Secrets and Desires
by Lolly4Holly
Summary: Trying to make a long lasting romantic relationship with a work colleague is never easy, especially one who is a sexually repressed, hot head, who only seems to think of himself. He should just give up and find someone who actually wants to be with him, but Greg likes a challenge... Nick/Greg Slash. M-Preg. 20 Chapters. COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1 - Hot Head

**Secrets and Desires**

 **1st in Series**

 **Author:** Lolly4Holly

 **Pairings:** Nick and Greg pre slash

 **Contains:** M-Preg, M/M slash, Heart Break

 **Summary:** Trying to make a long lasting romantic relationship with a work colleague is never easy, especially one who is a sexually repressed, hot head, who only seems to think of himself. He should just give up and find someone who actually wants to be with him, but Greg likes a challenge...

 **Author's Note:** Hi guys, this story has been in the works for a while now. I've finally completed it and I'm going to start to upload a new chapter hopefully once a week, after I've read and corrected it. Currently there are 20 chapters to this story, but I'm already working on a sequel. I don't want to give you too many spoilers, but I will have to state that this is an eventual M-preg. Not for a long time yet, but please be patient. Thanks for reading, I hope you enjoy it. Please remember to leave me a review if you did. Thank you!

~ Holly

* * *

 **Chapter One - Hot Head**

"What the hell do you think you're doin'?"

Despite the angry tone in the older man's voice, listening to him shook Greg in an unexpected way. He felt as though the whole lab had suddenly come to a standstill and they were the only two people alive. Even the anger in his delicious Texan voice made his spine tingle, touching his soul in ways no other man had. He looked like an angel. He had been quite short tempered and rude over the past few weeks, making him appear more like an archangel, but he was still the most beautiful man alive.

Warrick had warned him less than an hour ago that he was on the war path. He didn't know exactly how much trouble he would be in, until the Texan finally tracked him down to the break room. He didn't realise that he was still pouring himself a coffee, until the hot liquid pooled over the surface of his mug, scolding his fingers.

"Ow."

"We worked this case together." Nick presented him with the report he had found. "You completely took all the credit for it. You even closed it without tellin' me, now Grissom wants to send you on some conference. I knew you were selfish, Greg. I just never realised that you would do somethin' like this."

"I..." Greg tried to find the words to explain himself, but none of it made sense anymore. The truth was that Nick was nowhere to be seen during the last leg of their case. He ditched him for something more important to do, so he was forced to work the rest of the case alone. He couldn't very well sign Nick's name on the report when he closed it as that would have been illegal, so he didn't have any other choice but to close it himself.

"You sold me out, Greg." The disappointment on his face made Greg angry.

"I sold 'you' out?" He frowned at the older man. "You ditched me. I've only been a field CSI for the past six months. 'You' abandoned the case. 'You' jeopardised the whole thing for some personal matter that you won't even tell me about and you expect me to give you credit when all you did was process the primary crime scene with me. You don't deserve to go the conference."

"I don't deserve it?" Nick felt even more offended, giving the younger man a hard shove against the counter behind him. "You're not even a real CSI. You failed, remember. You're a joke."

Greg felt his heart pounding as Nick leant closer. He was close enough to smell the apple scented gel he used in his hair. So close that he could almost picture what it would be like to kiss him. But he could still feel his angry glare looking right through him. If only he could get out those three little words and tell him exactly how he felt about him. He might beat him to a bloody pulp or you never know, he might even share his feelings.

Deep... deep down.

He inhaled a deep breath, looking into the perfect chocolate brown eyes in front of him. "Says the CSI who takes personal time right in the middle of an important case. You didn't just let yourself down, Nick. You let down our victim." He felt his heart frantically racing as soon as he got the words out, worrying that the older man was going to hit him harder this time.

Nick stared him down for a little while longer, before he turned on his heels to leave.

"At least I don't sell out my friends." The Texan called back to him, shoving a lab technician out of his way.

The tech glared back at Nick, keeping out of his way as he stormed past him. "What's his deal?" He turned to look at the receptionist.

"I have no idea."

Greg rubbed his bruised hip as the hot headed Texan disappeared down the hallway, wondering when exactly would be a good time to tell him that he adored everything about him. He should probably wait until after the conference, when he would finally start to cool down a little, but the Texan could stay mad for a very long time.

So he could be waiting a lot longer than he wanted to.

Storming towards the parking lot of the lab, Nick tried to calm himself with a few deep breaths, but it wouldn't work this time. He turned towards his truck at the end, stopping beside one of the concrete support blocks. He knew it would hurt like hell, but it was the only way he knew how to release tension. His fist slammed straight into the concrete, practically shattering his knuckles back into his hand.

Despite the pain in his hand, he did it again and again, but it didn't make him feel any better.

"Hey, Nick. Nick! Nicky, stop. Stop it." His best friend struggled to restrain his arms at his sides, trying to stop him from hurting himself further. He could see the blood on the concrete block, worrying that he had broken something as the younger man flinched back from the restraint. "What the hell are you doing, man?"

"Get off me, Warrick." Nick pulled out of his arms, leaning against the concrete block with his arm cradled against his chest.

"Whatever it is, it ain't worth breaking your frigging hand over." He tried to turn him to inspect the damage, but he stubbornly pulled away from him.

"How would you know?"

"Don't be an idiot, Nick. You're bleeding." Warrick grabbed his arm this time, pulling it towards him to take a look. He couldn't tell if anything was broken with all the blood, but he thought it was better to be safe than sorry. "C'mon, I'll drive you to the emergency room. Get them to take a look at that hand."

Not taking no for an answer, he practically dragged the man over to his car, getting him into the passenger seat. He turned off his radio before he started up the car, taking off towards the hospital. He wanted to ask him what was going on in that head of his, but he didn't think he was ready yet.

The emergency room was practically empty, very unusual for a Friday night, but it meant that Nick could get his hand seen to within no time at all. He refused any treatment at first, but with some persuasion from his best friend, he reluctantly got his hand x-rayed. He was relieved to find out that he didn't have any broken bones, meaning he could get out of there quicker.

"Hold up, one sec." Warrick caught up to him outside of the hospital. "Nick, just talk to me for a moment. How do I know you're not gonna go back home and do the same thing to your other hand? You can't bottle stuff up like this." He grabbed hold of his good arm, stopping him from walking any further. "What's going on, man? You haven't been yourself for weeks."

"Greg..."

"It can't be all about what Greg did. That was yesterday, you've been off with everyone for weeks. I agree that Greg had it coming, but he's not the source of all of this anger you've got going on. What's going on?"

Giving out a sigh, Nick dropped to one of the benches near the taxi bay, ignoring the stench of stale cigarettes invading his nostrils. He cradled his sore hand against his chest, looking at the dried blood on his knuckles. He looked as though he wanted to say something, but he didn't quite know how to get the words out.

"Look whatever it is, Nick." Warrick took a seat beside him. "You can tell me. You don't have to go through whatever it is alone."

Nick remained silent for the longest time, starting to make Warrick lose his patience. He listened to the conversations of the paramedics behind him to pass the time, overhearing a doctor's instructions at the door, followed by the frantic yelling of a nurse from the blood loss.

"Nick, c'mon man."

"Do you remember, Grace?" The Texan finally spoke, leaning back against the rotting surface of the bench. "The girl I hooked up with at the end of last year. The red head waitress I met durin' that celebration dinner thing we had for Greg, passin' his CSI field exam. Barely." He tried to jog the man's memory. "Well she contacted me last month. She's pregnant... with my baby." He added, just in case that wasn't obvious to him.

"Pregnant." Warrick whistled, folding his arms across his chest. "What are you gonna do?"

"There's nothin' I can do." Nick tried to scratch off the dried blood from his hand. "The baby was born premature a few weeks ago. Twenty nine weeks gestation. A girl. One pound exactly. She's really tiny. She had an operation on her heart last week. It's why I skipped out on the case... and Greg. I'm not ready to be a Dad. I don't even know if I can love her. I only just found out about her."

"You're a Dad?" He smiled at the man beside him. "I thought you always kinda wanted to be a father."

"Yeah. But not like this. My first four weeks as a father, I've just been rushin' up the hospital every time there's a problem with her. I've got my Dad tellin' me to get a DNA test on this kid before I commit to anythin'. He thinks this woman is tryin' to saddle me with a sick kid that isn't even my own. My Mama thinks we should tell the doctors not to intervene any further and just let her die. And Grace, she wants to give her up for adoption. She keeps sayin' she's not ready to have a kid in her life, especially a sick one that's gonna weigh her down. What am I supposed to say to any of that?" He finally let it all out, giving out a heavy sigh. "She doesn't even have a name yet and everyone's already decidin' her fate."

Warrick saw the frustration on his face, realising what he had been dealing with over the past few weeks. "What do you want for her? C'mon, you should have a say. You're her father."

"I don't feel like her father." He jumped as his phone vibrated against his hip, struggling to pull his cell out with his other hand. "That's the hospital. I gotta go." He climbed to his feet, making his way back through the front doors of the hospital. He followed the familiar route towards the neonatal unit, standing at the doors a moment to watch the various doctors and nurses making their way in and out the double doors. He wasn't sure what he wanted. He knew he couldn't just let her die alone.

He may not love her like a father should yet, but he wasn't a monster.

"Want me to go in with you?" Warrick appeared beside him. "I'm not saying I'm gonna hold your hand or anything." He gave him a slight smile. "But I'm here for you. I meant it, you don't have to go through this alone."

"Thanks." Nick kept his focus on the doors, sucking in a sharp breath, before he took a step forwards. He made his way towards the front desk with Warrick at his side, catching the attention of the nurse he had been dealing with over the past few days. "How is she? What happened?"

"Oh, we weren't expecting you for a while yet, Mr Stokes. Follow me." She grabbed a file off her desk, ushering him towards another set of double doors. "We were just going to let you know that her infection has cleared up. The doctors will come and find you later to tell you more, but it seems like she's out of the woods for the moment. Is your friend coming in?" She paused outside the doors with the disinfectant hand wash, looking at Warrick beside him.

Warrick glanced at the younger man beside him, before he gave her a nod. "Sure, just for a few minutes." He rubbed the sticky disinfectant between his hands, reaching for Nick's good hand to help him out. He couldn't exactly rub it between his fingers with just the one hand, making him grateful for the company. "Which one is she?"

Nick followed the nurse towards the end of the room, stopping at one of the incubator's with the familiar looking baby inside. She was so tiny, but she was barely visible under the various tubes and wires covering her little body. He couldn't even see what she looked like because of the tape and breathing mask covering her face. He stepped up beside the incubator to take a look at her, looking for signs of life. Her tiny little fingers at her side twitched every so often, but she was so still it scared him a little. He wanted to reach out for her to wake her up, but the incubator was in the way and he wasn't allowed to open it for fear of further infection.

"She is tiny. She's barely as big as my hand." Warrick noticed her little legs the size of toothpicks, sticking out from beneath the huge diaper. "She looks kinda like you." He confessed, getting a peak at her features and the thick brown hair she had on her head. "I'm serious. She's a miniature you."

Nick gave him a slight smile, tilting his head to the side to try and see what Warrick saw. "I never knew how people could tell that. Babies all look the same."

"Babies don't look the same." Warrick chuckled softly. "She has your brow. Your hair. Those lips look pretty familiar too. Have you thought of any names for her?"

"Not really." He shrugged his shoulders together. "I don't know how you're supposed to name someone you've just met and don't know anythin' about. What if I pick somethin' that doesn't fit her?"

"Our parents probably figured the same thing when we were little. My Grandma chose my name, because my parents kept going back and forth between their decisions. What kinda names do you like?"

"I don't know." He placed his good hand on top of the incubator, looking down at his little girl. "My Grandma's name was Sadie. Her middle name was Ariel." He remembered the kind old lady from his childhood who always baked cinnamon cookies and first taught him how to play poker. She took care of him a lot while his parents were working, quickly becoming his best friend until she was taken away from him so abruptly.

"Like the mermaid?"

"Yeah, like the mermaid." He smiled back at his best friend. "My Grandma was named after the Shakespeare, Ariel though. Not the little mermaid. My great grandparents didn't agree on usin' it as her first name, so they settled for Ariel as her middle name."

"You could name her after your Grandmother then. Ariel or Sadie, that's cute. I don't think I've ever known a Sadie before." Warrick bent down to examine her little features, smiling at Nick on the other side. "Sadie would kinda suit her. Plus she's got big eyes, super long eyelashes, so she needs a girly name. And it will have more meaning to you than any other name you pick. Is that a birth mark on her leg?"

"Yeah... it's a little heart shape." Nick had spent most of his time at the hospital examining the fragile little being inside the incubator. He practically knew every part of her now, but he had no idea what her cries sounded like or the colour of her eyes. She had barely opened them over the past few weeks and her cries were limited by the tube down her throat to help her breathe. "I guess it kinda suits her."

"Do you have to run it by..." Warrick's mind went blank as he tried to think of the woman's name. He was about to say, Michelle, but that was over three years ago now. "The mother?" He simply stated, getting a smile out of the younger man.

"Grace." He reminded him. "No, she hasn't been by since the first week. I told you she doesn't wonna deal with a sick kid. She hasn't gone back to work yet though. She's stayin' with her Mom in Connecticut."

"She went home?" Warrick straightened up, cocking an eyebrow in the other man's direction. "And left her baby here." He couldn't believe that someone would do that, especially a new mother.

Nick shrugged his shoulders together, scratching his sore hand as it started to itch. "She was here with her for the first few days. It really upset her that she couldn't hold her."

"Don't make excuses for her, Nicky. She's run off back home and ditched the kid with you. She's your responsibility now. She's your little Stokes baby. Your baby Sadie. Or Ariel. Whatever you decide." He turned his wrist to look at the time, motioning over his shoulder towards the door. "I should head back to the lab before they notice I'm gone. I'm working a case with Catherine, so she's bound to notice I'm gone sooner or later. You gonna be alright here by yourself?"

"Yeah." The Texan gave him a nod, watching his daughter's fingers curling ever so slightly into her palm. "I'm not really by myself anymore." He waved his buddy off, keeping a close eye on his little girl as she slept. "Sadie." He thought it over, while he watched her. Her fingers twitched slightly when he mentioned it, putting a smile on his face. He glanced up as he caught the nurse staring him, stepping aside to let her through. "What's that for?"

"Oh it's her feed. She can't suckle yet, so it has to go through a feeding tube to her stomach." The woman explained, stepping around him to set it up. "Did they tell you that you can touch her today?" She popped open one of the side doors to the incubator, giving him a smile. "Her skin is still really fragile, but she's over her infection, so you can touch her if you want. Her stitches are all cleared up, so there's no risk of further infection."

Nick anxiously bit his bottom lip, looking through the open circular door at the delicate little baby inside. He wanted to so she would know that she wasn't completely alone in the world, but he didn't want to hurt her.

"What happened to your hand?" She noticed him cradling it against his chest.

"Oh..." He glanced back at the bandage wrapped tightly around his sore knuckles, starting to make them feel a lot worse. "It's a... long story." He lowered his hand to his side, noticing the card on the incubator that said 'Baby Girl Hannigan.' He didn't even know Grace's surname until now and she was nowhere to be seen during these first few stages of her little girl's life. "Um... can I change her name..." He motioned towards it. "Without the mother here, I mean."

"Are you the biological father?" She finished up with the feeding tube, filling out the chart resting on the top. "The biological mother has turned over all decision making to you until the adoption is sorted out, so I guess that includes changing her name. What are you gonna change it to?"

"I was thinkin' about namin' her after my grandmother." He placed his good hand on the opening of the incubator, watching her little chest arching up and down with each other. He knew it wasn't her that was taking those breaths, but it was still the most amazing thing he had ever seen.

"What's your Grandmother's name?" The nurse pulled out the card from the end of the crib, waiting for his response.

"Sadie. I'm gonna call her Sadie Stokes."

* * *

 **Thank you for reading, please review!**

 **~ Holly**


	2. Chapter 2 - Strong Desire

**Chapter Two - Strong Desire**

Watching the jury filing back into the room, Greg gulped softly, trying to figure out what they were going to say by the expressions on their faces. The one in front, making her way towards the first seat just looked bored out of her mind. She must have been in her late forties, a teacher or something by the attire. He guessed she was single and probably childless from the look in her eyes. She looked like she had seen it all though, so she might have been a foster carer of some sort. There was no way she was going to let this man walk free.

He wasn't too sure about the man beside her though. He had a fading tattoo on the side of his neck, more visible now that he had been fiddling with the collar of his shirt. He looked a little anxious compared to the others, but it might have just been the humidity in the room that was making his bald head look so moist.

"Hey," Sara returned from the hallway, taking her seat beside Greg in the back of the courtroom. "Am I late? Did I miss it?"

"Nope, not yet." He motioned towards the jury, bypassing the dirty blonde in her late thirties to examine the next woman. Now she looked like a mother. The expression in her eyes reminded him a lot of his own mother's. Her hair was neatly tied back into a bun and unlike the blonde beside her, the makeup on her face so subtle and complementary to her features. She clearly took pride in her appearance, everything was perfectly coordinated from the colour of her eye shadow, to the perfectly painted nail polish on her fingers and the clip used to fasten back her hair. She would never find a man like their suspect innocent.

"All rise."

Greg climbed to his feet, barely seeing the judge making her way back to the station with all the people stood in front of him. He took a seat as soon as everyone else had, hearing Sara's stomach growl beside him. He gave her a smile, before he turned his attention towards the front.

The court clerk rose from his desk, leaving the pencil he had been twiddling through his fingers behind. He cleared his throat, smoothing his hand down his creased jacket, before he spoke, "Have the jury reached a verdict upon which all of you are agreed?"

"We have." The man on the other end spoke.

He looked a little rough around the edges. His suit was crumpled and stained, telling him that he wasn't concerned about his appearance at all, especially with the clumpy beard hanging off his chin. But the wedding ring on his finger told him that he had a family to support. Probably with a few kids by the look of exhaustion on his face and the wrinkles gathering on his forehead, but it could have just been a nagging wife or mother in law that had done that to him over the years.

"On count one, do you find the defendant guilty or not guilty of murder in the first degree?" The clerk continued, straightening his suit for the second time. He was actually trying to hide the fact that he was desperately struggling with heart burn from the big lunch he had earlier with his mistress.

Greg turned his attention towards the jury, feeling Sara's hand lifting his own, grasping his fingers tightly. She wasn't even involved in the actual processing of this case, she just wanted to be there to support him when he had to give his evidence.

"Guilty." The member of the jury finally spoke.

The young lawyer from the district attorney's office seemed thrilled by the win, turning to look at the victim's family behind her. She had told them that she couldn't promise anything during this case, but they had every faith in her that she could nail the monster that murdered their sixteen year old daughter. She shook hands with the Detective and police officers from the case, letting out a sigh of relief as she watched the murderer finally being taken away.

"You did it, Greg. You won your first solo case." Sara congratulated him, helping him to his feet. His legs were still a bit wobbly after making his way to the witness stand earlier. He still felt a bit queasy, but it was starting to pass now that it was all over.

"Technically, this was my third solo case. It's just the first that I've seen all the way to the court room." He corrected her, pulling his hand away from the woman as the victim's family passed them. He thought they would look a little happier by the win, but then he realised that seeing a man put behind bars still wouldn't bring their daughter back.

Sara waited until the victim's family were out of earshot, before she turned to look at the younger man beside her. "You look like you could use a drink. C'mon, we'll head back to the lab and gather the guys for a little celebration drink."

"Seriously..." He couldn't say no right now, but he wasn't too sure if a drink was the right answer for something like this.

"C'mon, first rounds on me. Just don't tell, Catherine... or Warrick." She knew they would take advantage of her generous offer. "Probably not Nick either."

"I don't think you have to worry about me talking to Nick right now. He's still giving me the cold shoulder after that conference opportunity that Grissom gave me the other week. Maybe we just shouldn't invite him at all." He suggested, rubbing the bruise still on his hip from his forceful shove against the counter. "I doubt he would even come along if he knew I was there."

"It can't be that bad." Sara weaved through the press with Greg's hand in her own, making their way down the steps of the courthouse to safety. "I know Nick's a hot head, but he doesn't exactly hold grudges or hate anyone for doing something. He's one of the most forgiving people I know. Probably all that religious stuff."

"Nick's not religious." Greg stopped her there, leading the way back to his car. "His Mom was super religious growing up. Made them say their prays and go off to church every Sunday, but his Dad never bought into any of it. Nick doesn't even believe in God." He turned to look at her as he unlocked his car. "Did you just stereotype someone, Sara Sidle? I thought you hate it when people try to stereotype you?"

"I do." She climbed into the passenger seat, pulling her seatbelt straight on. "I just thought he was. He seems like the kinda guy who has faith in something. I know that Grissom believes in God. He just doesn't believe in Religion. He's really not?"

Greg shook his head, starting up the car. "We talked about it once on a case. The victim had a rosary wrapped around her neck. I just said looks like our vic was strangled with her own jewellery. He corrected me that it was a rosary and he told me about his Mom. She never goes anywhere with her rosary beads. She never believed in God before, she just sorta picked it up after her brother died."

"I never understood how people could do that." Sara gazed out the window at the late afternoon sky, hoping it would cool down this evening. She still couldn't get used to the blistering Las Vegas heat and it made her hair frizz which wasn't a very pretty sight. "I had a religious foster parent once. I think I was only there for a few months, but she seemed a little... crazy. Her husband was alright. He made sure that we said our prayers before bed and said grace at the dinner table, but the wife seemed like one of those scary serial killers you see in the movies. Like that movie... Carrie. Only the Mom, not the psycho kid with super powers."

"Because she was religious?" Greg raised an eyebrow in her direction.

"Maybe not just because of that. But she always had this weird look in her eyes when she told us off that reminded me of the Mom in Carrie." Sara shivered at the memory of the woman staring down at her, telling her that little girl's who didn't eat their vegetables would be sent straight to hell to eat with the devil. She smirked, wondering if the woman would be glad that she was a vegetarian herself now. "You're not... religious are you?"

"Not that I know of." He grinned round at her, turning off for their exit. "Why? Would that scare you if I was?"

"You... yes." She smiled back at him. "You wear lab gloves on your head and dance to Marilyn Manson in the lab halls. I'd be scared that you belonged to some kind of cult or something."

"I don't." Greg assured her, pulling his car into the lab parking lot. He immediately spotted Nick's truck in the usual spot, parking at least eight cars away from him, just so they wouldn't have to see each other. "I gotta go change. I'll meet you here in ten minutes. Better make it twenty." He realised that he needed a shower too from his nervousness at the court room.

"Okay, I'll round up the guys. The usual place?" She double checked, giving him a smile before she climbed out of the car. She wasn't normally the kind to throw a celebration drink after a solved case, but she sensed that the younger man needed it after the hard time he had been having lately.

Greg hurried straight up to the locker room, loosening his tie as he reached his locker. He hated the uncomfortable suit he had been forced to wear for the occasion, so he couldn't wait to take it off. He wrapped his towel tightly around his waist, slipping off his boxers, before he hurried through to the showers next door. The water was always freezing in the first one and the hose of the second one leaked, so he picked the third one down.

The stalls between them weren't exactly private, but they only ever came in one at a time, so it was actually the most privacy they had in the entire lab. Not that he had ever really taken advantage of that fact. He wouldn't dare to with Ecklie constantly patrolling the hallways.

After a few minutes, he stepped out of the shower, wrapping the towel tightly around his waist. He shook off the extra soapy bubbles from his arm, making his way back to the locker room. It was still empty, so he some time to change into his boxers and jeans, before his privacy was disturbed.

Of course, he was until the one person he didn't want to talk to walked in.

"Ouch." The Texan's attention was immediately drawn towards the scars that decorated the younger man's back. They were all there to witness the lab explosion, but it seemed to surprise them every time any one of them even caught sight of the evidence.

Greg quickly covered up with a t-shirt, avoiding any direct eye contact with the man. He wasn't sure if they were on good terms yet, but he felt as though he should make the first move. "Are you still pissed about the conference?" He still fancied the man after all, he didn't want to blow his chances with him completely, even though he knew it was a long shot that he would ever feel the same for him.

Nick simply decided to ignore him, going for his own locker beside him.

"Take that as a yes." He muttered softly, pulling his jacket back on. "You know what your problem is Nick." He couldn't hold his tongue any longer. He knew he'd regret it, but he had to get it out. "You're jealous. I didn't stab you in the back or anything to get this opportunity. I did it on my own and you're jealous. You're too big headed to realise that I could actually get something like this on my own, which is why you're still so pissed at me. You're just a stubborn, jealous... asshole."

"Name callin' now. Real mature." Nick rolled his eyes at him. "How could I be jealous of you? I worked hard to get where I am. If I had done what you did on your field exam, no one would have just handed me the promotion without a second thought. If Grissom really cared about this lab, he'd pull his head out of his ass and realise that you're just as reckless and immature as you were back in the lab. And I certainly wouldn't ever back stab any of my friends along the way. It's just a matter of time before you screw up again, Greg." He closed his locker, grinning smugly as he turned for the door.

"Dick." The younger man mumbled, feeling a chill running down his spine as he realised that Nick was still in the room when he said that. He immediately pictured the older man beating him to a bloody pulp, but instead he just remained by the door.

It was almost terrifying the way he just stood there.

"What is your problem with me?" He eventually turned to face him, charging towards him like a bull after a red target. "Why can't you just get off my case? So what, you got the conference. You didn't do anythin' to deserve it. Do you know how many conferences I've been to over the years?"

Greg knew that he probably shouldn't say anything at this point, especially not with his back to the lockers and the angry Texan stood in front of him. But he couldn't help himself. "The fact that you feel the need to tell me, only proves to me that you 'are' jealous."

The Texan clenched his fist at his side, feeling the pain returning from a couple of weeks ago. As much as he wanted to punch something, or someone right now to release the tension that was building up inside, he didn't really want to break his hand this time. "Do you get off on pissin' people off?"

"Only you." Greg rolled his eyes at himself, wishing he could just shut up. It was like a sickness though, he couldn't help himself. It was either the retaliation or leaning forwards and kissing the man he adored. He liked option one better at this point, even though both options could get him seriously injured.

"Why?" Nick's puzzled expression searched his face for answers. "What did I do to you that makes you wonna piss me off?"

"You're not exactly the innocent party here, Nick." He objected to him putting all the blame on him. "You were the one who ditched me on that case. You could have had your shot at that conference, but you blew with some personal matter that you thought was more important than our victim. I got that place fair and square. And you're jealous." He sounded a little bit like a child at this point, but he still couldn't stop himself.

His first impulse was to push him out of the way and get out of there before the Texan tried to punch him, but his second impulse was too strong to ignore. His lips were right there after all. He leant forwards to press his lips to Nick's, keeping his eyes on the older man's as he stole his first kiss from him.

The older man tried to open his mouth to protest it, but it didn't exactly work out how he planned. The simple movement allowed Greg to kiss him more tenderly. First with just his lips, merging them ever so passionately with his own. Moments later he felt his tongue flicker against his own. He playfully ran the tip of his tongue across Nick's teeth, enticing him to part his lips a little more. He sucked the Texan's delicious tongue into his mouth, keeping his eyes locked on Nick's the whole time.

The older man simply gazed back at him surprised for a moment, before he roughly pulled himself away. He almost toppled over the bench in the middle of the room during his haste to get away, but he couldn't simply turn and run after something like that.

He brought the back of his hand up to his mouth, wiping away any trace of the other man's lips. "What the hell was that?" He practically yelled at him.

"A kiss." Greg shrugged it off as if it was nothing.

"You freakin' pervert." Nick began roughly wiping his lips with the sleeve of his shirt this time, trying to scrub the memory from his mind more than he was his lips.

"Relax. I'm not infected with anything." He warned him, before he scrubbed his face raw.

"Yeah, like I'm gonna believe that. With my luck, I could catch some horrible STD off you. You look like the kinda person who would be intimate with anythin' that moves without even thinkin' about the consequences." Nick turned for the sinks, rinsing his mouth out with a handful of water. He glanced over his shoulder as Greg slammed his locker shut, relieved as he started walking away. He stopped rinsing his mouth out as soon as he was gone, lifting his eyes to the mirror to look back at his reflection.

How did he know?

How could he possibly know?

Did this mean that all of them knew?

Nick thought he had hidden it well. He hadn't acted on these stupid impulses ever since his father caught him that time as a teenager. He thought he was hiding it well then, but his father found him, took one look at him with the other boy, before he started to beat him to a bloody pulp. He wouldn't listen to a word he tried to plead between the blows to his ribs. He was just determined to beat the gay right out of his son. He had to lie to his family about the incident afterwards, telling them he came off a horse during a ride, rather than the painful truth.

Only he and his father ever knew the truth and his old man seemed to forget it all after a few years had gone by.

There was no way Greg could know any of that though.

If he did find out, it would have been the perfect way to toy with him. And it was working, because Nick could already feel those suppressed feelings returning. He had avoided any and every opportunity over the years, but his first kiss with his secret desire had awakened something in him that he didn't think he could control anymore.

* * *

 **Thank you janet1982, Marymel, Alisa123, dani-lyn and animelvr23 for your reviews on the last chapter. I hope you enjoyed this chapter just as much. It's not too angsty. I should hopefully have the 3rd chapter done this weekend. I don't have any other plans at the moment, so I might have some free time.**

 **Thank you for reading! Please review.**

 **~ Holly**


	3. Chapter 3 - Love Not War

**Chapter Three - Love Not War**

Being the last to arrive for their night out, Warrick thought he should get another round of drinks in, before he joined his colleagues in their usual spot. He stopped by the hospital after his shift was finally over, heading towards the NICU to see if Nick was around. The nurse he spoke to said that Nick hadn't stopped by yet, so he decided to wait around for him in case he did. He didn't show up though, even though his shift was over and he hadn't visited his daughter all day, so he assumed that he had gone to meet their colleagues for a celebration drink in Greg's honour.

But there was no sign of him there either.

"Hey, finally." Catherine greeted him with a sunny smile. "We were about to send out a search party for you."

"Yeah, sorry. I got held up. Congratulations, Greg." He handed him the first beer, waiting for Catherine to clear a spot on the table, so he could place the tray in the middle. "First case all the way to the court room. You really are one of us now." He pulled his jacket off, taking the seat between, Sara and Catherine. "Hey, where's Nick?"

"Haven't seen him." Sara shrugged her shoulders together, reaching for one of the glasses of wine off the tray.

"I mentioned it to him, but he said he had other stuff to do." Catherine reached for the second glass of wine, clearing the empty ones away. She totalled up how many she had actually drunk herself, realising this should be her last one unless she wanted to get tipsy and giggly again. "He might come by later though. Has he got a new woman in his life?"

"Do we have to talk about, Nick? He's not even here." Greg chugged back a few mouthfuls of his beer, ignoring the looks his colleagues were giving him. He couldn't stop thinking about what the older man had said to him. He thought the kiss was the perfect way to win him over, but instead he just thought he was some disgusting, STD ridden whore who slept with everything.

That was the farthest thing from the truth, but he couldn't stick around any longer to watch him scrubbing any trace of him off his face.

Sensing that there was still some bad blood between the two men, Warrick decided to change the subject, talking to his colleagues about the case he worked today with the dumbest criminal he had ever laid eyes on.

Greg blanked out their conversations after an hour or two, downing at least three more beers, before he found himself outside at the open door of a taxi. He would have bumped his head on the frame of the door, had it not been for Warrick beside him. He was going to ditch him in the cab and hope he found his way home like that, but he was practically asleep standing up.

Warrick reluctantly climbed into the cab with him, trying to get an address out of him, but the younger man couldn't remember it to save his life. He gave up as the drabble from the man's mouth started to make less and less sense, directing the driver to his own place. He never invited anyone back there, not even ladies after a date. He always opted to go to theirs. His house was his place of sanctuary, a way to put it all behind him and escape.

But he didn't really have any other choice.

"My sofa is leather. You throw up on it, you buy it." He eased the younger man onto it, keeping him upright so his sick covered t-shirt didn't touch his throw pillows. "Wait, wait..." He reached for the hem of the younger man's t-shirt, pulling it up and over his head in one clean sweep. He was lucky that most of it hit the side of the cab as they climbed out, but he still reeked of stale alcohol and vomit. He rolled up the t-shirt, stuffing it into the plastic carrier bag he had brought in with him, turning his attention back to Greg. "Before you lay down, are you gonna throw up again?"

"I..." Greg tilted his head back against the sofa, staring at the unusual coloured glass thing on the ceiling. It looked like a mirror, only it was coloured and the darker sections made his reflection more distorted. "Whoa..." He spoke softly to himself, widening his eyes to take in the full view of it. "It makes colours with the light." He sighed softly, feeling his back getting sticky against the leather. "Why's it all so white?" He turned his attention from wall to wall, followed by the white leather chair across from him and the white rug on the hardwood floor.

"You don't like my decorating now?" Warrick left him alone for a moment, grabbing a glass from the cupboard. He filled it with water from the sink in the kitchen, taking it back to Greg. "Drink this. Aye, c'mon." He lightly tapped his cheek. "Stay awake. I'm gonna go get an extra blanket and stuff from my room. Drink this."

"Don't sslaps." Greg slurred, taking the glass out of his hands. He touched his lips to the rim, but none of the liquid actually made it into his mouth. He received a scowl from the older man as the water spilled down his front, hitting the hardwood floor beneath him. "Whoops..."

"Yeah... thanks." He took the glass back, setting it on a coaster on the coffee table. He hurried to the kitchen for a towel, mopping the floor with it, leaving Greg's chest until last. He gave him another annoyed look as he returned to the kitchen, giving out a sigh to try and calm himself down. He should have just ditched him in that cab and hoped for the best.

"This is your place?" Greg studied the furniture around him.

"No, I broke in." Warrick sarcastically remarked, leaving him alone again to fetch a blanket and some pillows. He grabbed the empty waste basket from the bathroom, figuring it would work as a sick bucket. He thought he should find some kind of plastic sheet or something to protect his sofa or the floor, but he didn't have anything like that around the house. "Here." He passed him the pillow first, setting the bucket on the floor beside him. He considered rolling up the carpet to keep it well away from him, but he seemed a little more lucid than he did earlier. "Bathroom is right through there. Greg, right there." He pointed it out to him, making sure he saw it this time.

"I don't need to throw up." The younger man assured him, clutching the pillow tightly against his chest. "You hardly have any furniture." He spoke softly as if it was a secret, counting only three pieces in the front room. It was quite a large room, but it only had a coffee table, the sofa he was sitting on now and the single chair sat opposite him. "Where's your TV?"

"Bedroom. I don't need a lot of furniture. Aye, shoes." He quickly warned him, before he tried to put his feet up on his sofa. Warrick ditched the blanket beside him, kneeling down in front of him to assist him with his sneakers. He set them down beside the coffee table, noticing the younger man's scars as he straightened up. "Jeez, is that all from the lab explosion?"

"Don't sweat it." Greg lifted his legs, laying himself down against the sofa. "Some guys kinda like the battle scars look."

"Battle scars?" Warrick unravelled the blanket across him, slotting the pillow beneath his head. "You don't tell them what it's really from?"

"Well the first few times that I tried the lab explosion thing, they assumed I was a meth cook or something and I exploded my own lab. So now I just kinda let their minds run wild with imagination." He slid his arms beneath the blanket, looking up at the weird coloured glass thing on Warrick's ceiling again. "Why'd you buy that thing?"

"Does it really matter right now, Greg?" He moved the designated sick bucket closer to the sofa. "Hey, why you gotta give Nick such a hard time lately?"

"Me... give him a hard time?" The younger man sat straight up, offended by the accusation. "He's been on my case since I got promoted. The guy's an asshole. A selfish, sexually repressed, hot... hot head with a stick so far up his ass... he's jealous." He added, looking into the older man's eyes to explain his side. "He ditched me on that case. I got the opportunity fair and square and he's just pissed at me because he was busy with some personal matter. He should know that if you don't put the time in, you don't get squat. I did the work. I wrote the report and I solved the case. I did that all on my own, so I got the conference. If he wanted it so badly, he should have done something about it. Instead of throwing his weight around like a jealous... prick."

"He's got a lot going on in his life right now." Warrick knew he couldn't say anything about the baby, but he had to defend his best friend.

"So what? He's supposed to leave all that personal stuff behind. If the rest of us have to do it, then he should too. He said that I get everything handed to me, but he does. Everyone makes exceptions for that big headed, hot headed, dick. He could beat a guy to death and someone will pat him on the back and say good job. He's always breaking the rules, but he's still here. He even slept with someone from a case, then got framed for her murder. Oh but don't worry, it's poor little Nicky. We'll let him off this time because he didn't really mean it."

Warrick couldn't help but smile, rolling his eyes as he climbed to his feet. "You two sound exactly alike. I was with Nick the other day for drinks. He couldn't stop bitching about you either. Whatever it is between you two, you need to work it out. We're a team. We're supposed to work together and rely on each other with our lives. We can't have two people on our team that can't stand each other. You used to be tight."

"I used to be back in the lab. I told you..." Greg lay himself back against the sofa. "He's jealous."

"Okay, Greg. G'night." Warrick reached out for the light switch, giving the younger man a nod, before he clicked it off. He retired to his own bedroom at the end of the hall, giving the Texan's mobile a call to see where he was, but there was still no answer. He figured he must be up the hospital by now, checking on his daughter.

But that was the last place Nick wanted to be right now.

The Texan couldn't face it right now, but the alternative wasn't exactly the better option either. He escaped the shady gentleman's club he found himself in, not able to face another set of boobs in his face. He sucked in the cool night air, leaning back against the concrete wall that surround the club. He thought it would help to block out the memory of the very memorable kiss he had experienced earlier, but it was all he could think of in his own version of a nightmare realm. He had only been a few times with Warrick, focusing more on the conversation with his best friend than the women around him.

Now that it was just him, it all seemed so ridiculous. He couldn't even pretend that he belonged there anymore.

Greg.

It was all his fault. That stupid kiss from that selfish little asshole.

Because of him, his mind and feelings were all over the place. He didn't know what was more infuriating, the fact that he had allowed another man to kiss him or that he hadn't tried to fight it. He remembered it all so clearly. Not even the alcohol could blank out the moment the younger man's lips first touched his own. That spark. It warmed his whole body. He even saw his mouth closing in on his, but his desires stopped him from being able to move or stop him in anyway.

For the last twenty years, he had been able to resist the curiosity of knowing the taste of another man. Greg had broken all of that with just one kiss. How could he even know his innermost feelings? His weakness. His secret desire.

Was it that obvious?

"Are you alright, love?" A cowgirl approached him, a lit cigarette in one hand and a match in the other. She shook out the flame from the match, tossing it over her shoulder towards the curb. "A little too much woman for yah?" She grinned through the dark purple lipstick smudged across her lips. He couldn't really see anything flattering about her at the moment.

Maybe if she had a bulge between her legs or some facial hair, but he quickly shook that thought from his mind, trying to get past it.

She had quite attractive features, but the slutty makeup, low cut red flannel top and torn up jeans didn't really do anything for him. He had ignored his real type for so long, but all he could think about now was the strong muscles of a man. Greg wasn't even his type. He was way too dainty and average looking for him. Even seeing him with his shirt off did nothing for him, yet he still couldn't get him out of his mind.

"Hey." The cowgirl snapped her fingers together in front of his eyes. "Are you on something, sweetheart? Not that I mind." Her fingers found their way to his belt buckle. "No offence, but what's a guy like you doing in a dive like this? You could get a girl easy." Her palm found its way to the inside of his thigh. "What's the matter? Don't you like me. Are cowgirl's not your thing?"

"Get off me." Nick pried her hand away from him, fanning away the smoke from her cigarette. "I just wonna be left alone."

"Fine. Your loss." She turned on her heels, glancing back at him over her shoulder. "You know there's a boys club right around the corner. I'm sure a homo like you would fit right in."

"What'd you say to me?" Nick lunged forwards on impulse, grabbing her wrist. She dropped her cigarette during the lunge, but she didn't seem to care. "I'm not gay."

"Yeah, whatever you say, fairy." She cackled with laughter, only angering him even more. He gripped her arm tighter to try and get her to stop, shoving her against the brick wall he had been leaning against. "Ow, dick head."

"I'm not some... fairy. I've never even been with a man."

"So you're a repressed psycho that stalks women outside of gentleman's clubs then. Let go of me, dick." She shook her arm free from him, shoving him away with all her might. "Get out of here, psycho, before I set Bill on you. He'll smack your teeth down your throat so you choke to death." She threatened him, quickly hurrying away to the front entrance. She ran through the bar, fetching Bill from the back entrance to tell him about the psycho that jumped her outside.

Skylar had a tendency to overreact sometimes, but he thought he'd check it out anyway, finding no evidence of the fight she said had occurred or the psycho pervert that attacked her.

Nick made a run for it as soon as the woman had disappeared, not even worrying about his truck left behind in the parking lot. He couldn't exactly drive it back home in his current state, so he figured it would be safe until morning when he sobered up. He ran for a few blocks, until he found a familiar looking street. If he took it to the left, it would take him straight to the lab and a ride home, but the right took him to the hospital where his daughter was still waiting for him. She probably thought that she had been abandoned today as it was the first day in weeks that she hadn't had a visitor.

He thought about flipping a coin to make the decision, especially after standing still for just over five minutes. But then he felt his stomach rumble with hunger. The hospital served a lasagne dish he liked on Thursday nights. He could grab some food there to sober up, before he headed up to the neonatal unit to spend the night with his daughter.

It was better than returning to the lab with his tail between his legs, hoping someone could give him a ride and being with his daughter always made him forget about everything else. The insistent beeping and humming noises coming from the various machines helped with that.

Hospital it was.

Once his stomach was full of warm food, Nick made his way through to the ward, getting stopped by the regular doctor. She told him to wait there a second, leaving him out in the hall while she rushed in two of her nurses. It looked pretty serious from the speed, making him worry that something had happened to his daughter while he was gone. He stepped up to the window to spy in through the closed blinds, squinting his eyes together as he watched them trying to revive another baby. He had seen the parents stopping by every so often, but he didn't know if their baby happened to be a boy or a girl.

He felt a little ashamed as he sighed with relief, but he couldn't help but feel relieved that it wasn't his baby that was in trouble for once.

"What's going on?" A mother tried to punch the code into the outside door, but the nurse wouldn't allow her access. "I just went to get a coffee. Can I see my baby?" She motioned to a crib on the other side of the room. The babies over there weren't in full sized incubator tanks, but a few of them still had different breathing masks on their little faces. The baby she was pointing to just had the tubes going up her nostrils, along with a feeding tube plastered to the side of her little mouth.

Nick had been asking a million questions over the past few weeks, so he practically knew what every little piece of equipment did in his daughter's incubator.

"This is ridiculous." The woman threw her arms up in the air, pacing the hallway outside. "Is your baby in there?" She tried to make small talk with him, calming her anxious nerves.

"Yeah... I do." Nick pointed towards the opposite end.

"I got a daughter in there. Miley. She was born at thirty two weeks. She can breathe on her own now, she just has difficulty swallowing, so she has to stay here." She over shared with the stranger, expecting him to do the same, but he remained silent, trying to see what was going on through the blinds. "I don't see why they can't just let us in. It's not like we would get in the way or anything."

"They think it's too distressin' for other parents to watch." Nick finally spoke up, as it was already starting to worry him that the same could happen to his daughter. "It might be to protect the parents too. Would you want loads of people starin' at you durin' that?" He didn't even bother turning to look at her reaction, focusing his attention on the doctor as she did everything she could for the other baby. He eventually caught a smile exchanged between the nurses, trying to read their lips as they sealed up the incubator once again.

"Hey, what's going on?" The woman beside him caught the doctor as she came out of the double doors. "You can't keep me from my baby. This is ridiculous making us wait out in the hall. We're parents of babies in there."

"Mrs Burton, if you'd just give us one minute. You'll be back with your daughter before you know it." The doctor simply tried to calm her down, before she made her way towards the relatives room down the hall. Nick watched her go, spotting the parents of the other baby holding one another tightly inside. They looked so happy to see the doctor walking in, eager to hear exactly what had gone on with their baby.

"Why can't we go in?" Mrs Burton continued to complain, giving out a sigh as she paced the hallway again. "I bet she'd feel differently if she had a baby in there. But no, she has no idea what it's like to actually care for a child. She's probably one of those career first women or a lesbian. She looks like the sort, especially the hair. Stupid lesbian bitch, thinks she can keep me from my baby. Jealous, that's what she is. Jealous that I can actually get a man and have a baby, while she's stuck here..."

"Can you shut up?" Nick couldn't take it anymore, startling the woman by his gruff tone.

"How dare you." She waved her finger at him. "Security." She called over to the man as he passed by them. "Excuse me... you there." She pointed to him, ushering him over with her finger. "C'mon, this man just told me to shut up." She waved her accusing finger at Nick beside her.

The security guard looked at the woman a moment to make sure she was serious, before he turned his attention towards the accused. He recognised the man as a CSI who visited the hospital quite regularly during cases. He had seen a lot of him during the past few weeks, sensing it was more of a personal matter than a case. "Sir, maybe you should wait somewhere else for the moment."

"What?" Mrs Burton hissed at the man. "He's being rude, you should take him out of here. Escort him off the premises or something."

"With all due respect, ma'am, I can't escort someone out of the hospital for telling someone else to be quiet." He motioned to the sign above them that even requested silence in this part of the hospital.

"But that's not how he said it." She protested, raising her voice even more.

"It's fine." Nick raised his hands like the suspect she wanted him to be, taking a few steps away from the door. "I'll go." He figured the other parents would need some time alone to recover from the trauma they just went through, so he made his way back to the hospital cafeteria for a coffee. He hoped he could wait out Mrs Burton, but she was still there when he got back with her husband, happily at her daughter's side once again.

"Mr Stokes," A nurse finished up with the baby she was tending to, rubbing disinfectant between her fingers as she approached him. "Hi, I had a word with your baby's doctor today and she said it's okay for you to hold her now. She's gonna stop by later to talk to you." She followed him to his daughter's crib, pulling up a chair for him. "Don't worry, it's nothing serious. She just wants to see if your daughter, Sadie can breathe on her own now. She hasn't had any signs of infection in a while and she's a nice healthy size for a thirty four week old. Once she can breathe on her own, we can try feeding her through her a bottle."

Nick hadn't really heard anything past the point of being able to hold her now. He held her little foot in his palm for nearly two hours yesterday, but today he'd be able to hold her completely. He sat himself down on the chair, watching her opening up the side of the incubator. She looked like she had done this a few times as she managed to easily lift the baby out of the incubator, despite all of the things that were attached to her.

"Wait... won't it hurt her?"

"You won't hurt her. Don't worry about pulling anything out." She lay the tiny bundle against his forearm. "You're not going to hurt her by touching any of them. So don't worry about that either." She assured him, lifting his other arm from his side to support the little girl against his chest. "There you are, you're a natural."

He managed a slight smile, afraid to move his arms in case he hurt her.

"Will you be alright for a minute?"

Nick could only nod, keeping his eyes on the little girl in his arms. She felt surprisingly light. He was expecting to be holding a baby, but the youngest baby he had ever held was nearly one years old. She was still technically premature and barely weighed a thing though. He could only feel her against his arm because of the crinkly diaper and the heart monitors and things dangling over his arm. She was so delicate, he couldn't even feel the movements of her breathing. He could see her chest rising and falling, but the movement was as light as a feather.

"Hi, Nick." The doctor caught his attention, giving him a smile as he could barely lift his eyes from the beautiful little girl in his arms. "I can talk to you later if you want."

"No, it's okay." He assured her, brushing his thumb across the back of his daughter's tiny little hand.

"Well, this one's a little fighter isn't she? We thought we'd give her a shot at trying to breathe on her own soon. We'll see how she copes without the ventilator for a while. We'll switch her over to a nasal cannula, that's one of these." She reached for one off the side. "It's a little less invasive than the ventilator. It will feed her oxygen through her nostrils, rather than directly into her lungs. It allows her more freedom to get those little lungs working."

"How long after that before I can take her home?" He wasn't ready to have a baby at the house yet, but he couldn't wait to get her out of this place. He'd need a lot of time to prepare for her arrival at his house, so he needed to know how much time he had left to get everything ready.

"Well, once we get her started on breathing for herself, she has to learn how to suck, so she can feed without the tube into her stomach. After that, we'd like her to get to a healthy weight, before we send her home with you. Usually above four pounds, but it depends on what their original birth weight was. She'll have to be taken off the nasal cannula for a while before that, so we can make sure her stats stay at a normal level on her own. But I have high hopes for this little one."

"Thank you." He glanced up at the woman to give her a smile. "Hey, has there been any word from Grace, the birth mother?" He queried as he still couldn't get hold of her on any numbers she had left with him.

"Sorry, no." She shook her head, stuffing her hands into the pockets of her lab coat. "Can I give you some personal advice, Mr Stokes? If I were you, I would get yourself a lawyer. Someone with family law experience. The last time the birth mother was here, she spoke to someone about putting the baby up for adoption. They told her that she would need your permission as the birth father, so she asked them to take your name off the birth certificate. She made this big fuss about putting your name on it in the beginning, so it was a little suspicious that she'd suddenly change her mind and say the baby wasn't yours. We can DNA test her in here if you'd like. But you should definitely get yourself a lawyer in case she tries to cut you out again."

"O-kay." He gave her slight nod, trying to think of a family lawyer off the top of his head. He immediately thought of his sister's husband, wondering if he would even be willing to help him out. He couldn't even picture the possibility that Sadie wasn't his. He had fallen in love with her over the past few weeks and he wasn't ready to give her up for anything.

* * *

 **Thanks for reading, please review!**

 **~ Holly**


	4. Chapter 4 - Rock Bottom

**Chapter Four - Rock Bottom**

"Two years ago, a woman's body turned up in that same park with blunt force trauma to the head, defensive wounds to her wrists and arms. She was clearly bound and beaten prior to being killed and her clothes had been washed and folded, set on the ground beside her." Warrick slid the file across the conference table towards their supervisor, glancing at his partner beside him who looked half asleep. He continued with their findings on his own, figuring he'd step in if he had anything to add. "The case we were called to today, has the exact same MO. Right down to the fabric softener used on the clothes. The thing is, the suspect from the case two years ago is still behind bars. His name's Joseph Wright, he's serving life over at county."

Grissom pulled the first file closer, looking over the notes. "Sara worked the case? Have you spoken to her yet?"

"She's not in today." Warrick reminded the man. "She's got that thing with her Mom to deal with today. She did everything by the book though. She traced the original crime scene back to a closed down factory on the edge of town. Mr Wright's fingerprints were all over that place. He inherited the place from his late father and there were traces of the victim, along with a few others that were never found."

"I remember the case." The older man read through the report, flipping through the pages as Warrick continued to brief him on the details. He glanced up at Nick halfway through, narrowing his eyes on where the younger man was looking. He had his chin in his hand, resting his elbow against the table, staring at a fixed spot on the wall. He had been doing it for the past twenty minutes while they were talking, starting to make his eyes glaze over as he hadn't blinked once.

"San Francisco PD have been in touch, they had a similar case three years ago with the same MO. They had another one almost to the day the year before that. They never caught a suspect. I checked with other police departments and last year," Warrick shuffled through his findings, sliding the report towards his supervisor. "There was a murder just like this one in New York, while Mr Wright was still in jail. Sara always suspected that this guy had a partner..."

"So he might be the one moving around?" Grissom collected up the folders, sorting them into a pile. "I've got a meeting with the department supervisors in ten minutes. You wonna come up and present your case to them?" Before the man could accept the offer, he turned towards his dazed partner. "Nick, my office. Now." He instructed, exiting the room first.

"Hey," Warrick tapped his partner's shoulder, snapping him out of it. "Thanks for the backup." He sarcastically remarked. "Have you even slept in the past... week?"

"Not exactly." He climbed to his feet, grabbing his jacket off the back of the chair. "Sadie's been off the ventilator for two weeks. I've been goin' up there whenever I can to see her. I don't think I've actually been home for longer than five minute in weeks now." He closed his hand over his mouth to hide a yawn, feeling completely exhausted.

"Your baby isn't even home yet and you already look exhausted." He smirked, holding the door to the conference room open for him. "How long have you got before she comes home?"

"I don't know yet. I still don't have anythin' for her. She's just started feedin' for herself, so I guess it's just another few weeks." The man shrugged his shoulders, spotting Grissom tapping his watch at the end of the hall. "I gotta go." He gestured over his shoulder, lethargically making his way down the hall. He sensed it was something bad by the look on his face, but he figured he could deal with anything right now.

"Take a seat." Grissom motioned him towards one of the empty chairs, while he closed the door. He ditched the files from his hands on the edge of the desk, taking a seat on his chair. "Nick, you know I don't like to get myself involved in the personal lives of my team, but when it starts to affect your performance at work... I don't really have a choice." He gulped on the lump in his throat. "So I need to know what's going on."

"I... just haven't been gettin' a lot of sleep lately." He watched his supervisor sorting through his folders, pulling out a performance report. He thought now would be the perfect time to tell him, but then he noticed the complaint file with his name on it. "Someone complained? Who?"

"Ah..." The older man quickly pulled away the folder, before he could actually read it. "It's called an anonymous complaint for a reason, Nick. As your supervisor, I can't tell you about the complaint or who filed it, I just have to follow up with more reports that will be reviewed by someone else." He sighed heavily at the thought of having to review another employee and defend them in front of people who had never met them.

It was times like these that he realised why he never went for the supervisor position on his own. Someone just decided to hand it to him one day, forcing all the organisation and leadership down his throat.

"So you can't even tell me what kind of complaint was filed?" The man assumed, sighing himself as someone out there really had it in for him and he didn't even know who it was. "Look Griss...om," He leant forwards, watching his supervisor filling in the top part of the paper work. "I know I've been kinda out of it for a while, but I've been dealin' with a lot of personal stuff. My ex girlfriend showed up out of the blue..."

"We don't have a lot of time to get into it right now, Nick." His supervisor cut him off there, trying to remember the younger man's date of birth. "The department have advised me to make you speak to the department shrink."

"A shrink?"

"Mandatory." He quickly added, before the younger man tried to get out of it. "You and I will follow up with a performance review... at the end of the week. I'll leave your department shrink appointment dates with Judy at the front desk. Make sure you attend each of them." He gave him a quick warning, climbing to his feet to gather his things for his meeting.

"I have a seven week old daughter in the hospital." Nick continued his story, hoping he would give him the benefit of the doubt if he heard the truth. "My ex... not even a girlfriend really showed up and told me she was pregnant. She had our daughter prematurely at twenty nine weeks and she's been in the hospital ever since. I've been goin' up there every day to see her, which is why I've been so out of it lately. The baby, not the woman." He quickly clarified.

Grissom sighed, clutching the folders to his chest. "See, this is why I don't like to get involved in your personal lives. Do you know how much paper work this will involve?" He grabbed his glasses off the desk, slotting them into his shirt pocket. "You should have taken a leave of absence or some kind of maternity. Seven weeks?" He realised how old he said the child was. "You could be suspended for jeopardising any number of cases that you've been working."

"I didn't do anythin' wrong on my cases though." He protested. "I can't lose my job. I'm the primary care giver to a newborn."

"Attend the mandatory shrink meetings." Grissom gave him a plain and simple direction. "We'll deal with the rest after that. Judy has the appointment dates." He reminded him for the second time, before he slipped away to get to his meeting.

Sighing heavily, Nick stepped out of the man's office, making his way towards the front desk. "Hi," He gave Judy a slight smile. "Do you have some appointment dates for me?"

"I do." Judy searched through the things on her desk, handing him one of the message cards. "I wrote her number on there for you. Do you want directions to the office?"

"No it's okay." He shook his head, having been forced to go there before. He didn't want to, but they all thought he needed it after his home invasion. Having a psycho stalker wasn't exactly something that happened every day, but the last thing he wanted to do was talk about it after the man was dead and gone.

He stuffed the message card into the inside pocket of his jacket, making his way towards the locker room to pack up for the day. He still technically had twenty minutes left of his shift, but he needed to get to the hospital to see his daughter, Sadie before the visiting hours were over.

When he walked into the locker room, he immediately caught sight of the man he had been avoiding, considering turning on his heels to run for it, but then he remembered the complaint that had been filed against him. He didn't know anyone other than Greg who could possibly hold a grudge against him right now. He was probably mad that he turned him down after the kiss.

He had done this to get his own back on him.

"What's your problem with me?" He startled the younger man, keeping some distance between them, just in case he tried to attack him again.

"Go away, Nick. I don't have the time for this today." Greg pulled his jacket out of his locker, stuffing his phone into the back pocket of his jeans. He wiped the tears from his cheek while his back was still turned, before he turned to face the self obsessed asshole in front of him. "I don't have a problem with you. Can you move?"

"Really, because you not only took advantage of me, but now you're tryin' to ruin my career? That's low even for you, Greg."

"What?" He returned with a puzzled expression. "I haven't done anything to ruin your career, you're doing that all on your own. You know what," Greg threw his arms up in the air. "I don't even care anymore. Take your stupid sexually repressed drama to someone who gives a crap, because I certainly don't."

"If you don't care, then why did you file a complaint against me?"

"What?" He frowned at the older man. "I didn't do that."

"Yeah, and I'm supposed to believe that." Nick rolled his eyes, taking a dangerous step closer to him. "This is exactly the kind of thing that someone like you would do, especially if there was a career advancement in your favour."

Greg sighed, giving up on fighting it. "Think what you want, it wasn't me. And I'm sick of trying to explain myself to you all the time. I don't care what you think anymore." He closed up his locker, pulling his bag over his shoulder, before he turned to face the man again, "I would 'never' sell out my friends. No matter how much of an asshole he was."

The Texan roughly grabbed his arm, pushing him up against the locker. "Then you did it because I rejected you."

"Get over yourself, you're not even that good of a kisser." Instead of fighting to get free, Greg adjusted his back against the locker, looking at the delicious lips poised in front of him. He wouldn't dare to try and steal another, but his muscular body pressed up against his was enough to suffice his cravings for now. "Maybe our friendship isn't that important to you anymore, but to me our friendship matters a whole lot more than some stupid job."

Nick stared into his eyes as he said it, realising he was telling the truth. He also noticed that his eyes were slightly glazed as though he had been crying recently. He hadn't ever seen Greg cry. He didn't think he was that kind of guy.

"What's wrong?" Nick quickly changed the tone of his voice, giving him a concerned look rather than an angry one.

"Nothing." Placing his hands on Nick's chest, Greg pushed him away to give himself some breathing room. He peeled his back off the locker, feeling the ridges imprinted on his spine. "Do you really think that I would file a complaint against you? Yeah you're being a real asshole lately, especially towards me for some reason, but I wouldn't do that to one of my best friends. Me moving to the field had 'nothing' to do with you."

He made sure his locker was shut, taking a step around his colleague for the door.

"Well, it did actually," He corrected himself, turning to face the older man. "I was so sick of only seeing one side of a case. I only knew the victims or the cases by the case number or the DNA samples that came through my lab. Seeing you guys going back and forth between crime scenes, interrogations and all that, made me want to be able to see the whole case from start to finish. I didn't do it to get one over on you. I just... wanted to do what you do. I wouldn't ever do a thing to ruin that for you. And the fact that you think I would really hurts. I'm not some manipulative, deceitful person that you think I am. I'm the same guy you knew from the lab that you used to be friends with."

Greg turned for the door to slip away once again, before the Texan had time to think of a hurtful retaliation. He could have handled it on a normal day, but not on the day he found out that Papa Olaf's cancer had spread further, leaving him with even fewer options than before. He made it all the way to the elevator, alone, but Nick managed to slip through the doors before they closed.

"Oh, what?" The younger man leant back against the wall, openly showing his annoyance towards him.

"I'm not here to fight." Nick assured him, waiting for the doors to the elevator to close behind him. "I've got a lot of stuff on my mind lately."

"You think you're the only one?"

"No." He shook his head, stuffing his hands into his pockets. "I'm sorry I accused you of filin' a complaint against me. I've just been dealin' with a lot lately, now I have to go to this stupid shrink and my career is in jeopardy when I need it the most."

"I'm sorry." Greg spoke softly, quickly adding, "But I didn't do it."

Nick managed a slight smile, turning to lean against the wall beside, Greg. "I bet it was that technician in ballistics." He thought about it a little more. "She's had it in for me since I didn't call her back after our one night stand."

"Wasn't that three years ago?" He remembered the gossip. "You still don't know her name, do you?" He couldn't help but smile as the older man stared blankly at the elevator panel. "Why would she up and decide one day to file a complaint against you? She's dating one of the deputies. I'm pretty sure she hasn't given you a second thought."

"What is her name?" Nick tried to think of it, but his exhausted mind couldn't think straight.

"Cindy." Greg jogged his memory. "And I don't think she's your complainer. You might wonna keep digging a little deeper. How many people have you pissed off in the past few months?"

"Months? It's only been... a few weeks." He pushed himself to his feet as the doors slid open, beginning to think that they didn't even press any buttons. He turned to look at Greg beside him, anxiously biting his bottom lip. "I really am sorry, G." He used the familiar nickname that he hadn't heard in a while. "The stuff I've been dealin' with..." He thought he should know the truth after what he had put him through. "I have a newborn daughter. She's been in the hospital for the past seven weeks. I know it's no excuse for how I've treated you, but I've got a lot on my plate at the moment with the hospital, the baby, the birth mother skippin' out on me, my parents... the point is," He stopped himself from rambling in his exhaustion. "I'm sorry."

Instead of stepping forwards for a hug, Nick extended his hand towards him. The younger man couldn't help but smile again, extending his hand towards him. He still completely adored him, but a hand shake was enough for now. Considering how he took the kiss, it might be the only contact he ever got with the man, so it would have to do.

"Congratulations, I guess. A daughter." Greg whistled, stepping out of the elevator ahead of him. He felt a chill running down his spine as he did, not sure if it was the news or the parking garage that made him cold. "I gotta go. Try and get some sleep before your next shift." He stumbled back into one of the concrete pillars, making a hasty getaway towards his car. He knew he had no chance with him before, but the confirmation of him moving on with life in a completely different direction made the truth even harder to swallow.

He hurried home to his apartment, stumbling over the suitcase he had packed for his conference. He wasn't even sure if he wanted to go anymore. He couldn't move even further away from his Papa Olaf. It was already a four hour drive to get there, and that was already too long.

Greg ditched his backpack on route to his kitchen, grabbing one of the stale pizzas slices from the fridge. He had always hated cold pizza. It just wasn't the same as warm pizza with freshly melted cheese, but it was the only food he had left in the house. He tripped over his dropped backpack on his route through the apartment, kicking off his sneakers at the side of his bed.

His apartment was pretty much open planned. He was looking for a large studio apartment in the beginning, but he quickly decided that this one was his favourite. The kitchen was right at the door, partly separated by the rest of the house with the L shaped counters. Around the counters and down the single step was the open living room and dining room, with large windows across one wall. He hadn't really done much in the way of decoration, but the sofa and dining table complemented each other well.

A step up at the end of the dining room brought him into his bedroom. The window on the wall was a lot smaller, but still let in a fair amount of light. Unlike the rest of the house, it was the only room that had hardwood floors. The only furniture he had in there was the low king sized bed with a memory foam mattress and a single bedside table. He had a walk in wardrobe behind the first door and a decent sized bathroom behind the second. The place wasn't exactly big enough for more than one person, but he considered that as an advantage.

His mother certainly wouldn't want to stay over for one thing, giving him the space he had always craved as a teenager.

At times like this though, it felt more than a little lonely to live alone. He didn't even have any friends outside of work anymore. He hadn't spoken to any of his other friends in almost two years now. He lost touch with them all because they really didn't have anything in common anymore and none of them understood why he would want to progress his career to actually start dealing with the dead.

Greg dropped to the end of his bed with a sigh, pulling out his cell from his jeans. He scrolled through his phone book, anxiously biting his bottom lip as he passed so many names, trying to find anyone to talk to. His mother was the obvious choice, but she was going through a lot with her father at the moment, so he couldn't dump this all on her. His father always said he would be there to talk to him. He was a good listener, but not so good at the advice side of things.

"Sara." He sighed as he passed her name. She had her own mother to deal with at the moment, bringing him to Stuart's number still in his phone book.

His ex boyfriend used to be a good listener, but that was long before he cheated on him. He realised he had sunk to rock bottom as he hit dial, waiting for the call to go through to the man's cell. He started to hope that he had changed his number or something, but before he could hang up himself, Stuart answered.

"Hi," Greg threw himself back against the bed, giving out a soft sigh. "It's me... Greg. Are you busy?"

* * *

 **Thank you vegas nivel 3, Marymel, animelvr23 and guests for your reviews! Don't worry, it's not over yet. More on the way soon.**

 **Please review if you enjoyed it!**

 **~ Holly**


	5. Chapter 5 - Down Hill

**Chapter Five - Down Hill**

Seventeen minutes, thirty three seconds exactly, that's exactly how long Nick's obnoxious shrink had been making him wait this time. He didn't understand why she always booked his appointments at the top of the hour, to then make him wait for nearly twenty minutes every time. After nearly two weeks of this, it was starting to get ridiculous. She didn't even give him a full hours session once he was in there and he couldn't discuss anything serious as it could affect his entire career.

He made a mental note to ask her how much longer these two sessions a week would last before he was back on fulltime active duty at the lab. Working part time at the moment made it a little easier to visit his daughter in hospital whenever he wanted, but he wasn't around long enough at the lab to see a case right through to the end. He had no idea what he was going to do once she was finally able to come home.

Her doctors were still confident on the progress she was making, despite the infection she caught the other week and the total lack of a sucking or swallowing reflex. She was still on assisted oxygen, but he had actually witnessed her gasping in a few deep breaths for herself over the past few days.

"Mr... Stokes," The supposedly qualified, Doctor Marilyn Harper finally stepped out of her office, reading his name off her appointment book. She was in her late fifties or something with more greys in her hair than his father in his seventies. Her hair was cut short enough to pass for a man, especially with her very slender figure and total lack of curves. The only thing that really gave her away was the painted fingernails and the stench of her lavender perfume. "If you'd like to come on through." She directed him into the office.

Nick checked the clock on her desk before he sat down on the sofa, comparing the time with his watch. It was ten seconds ahead of his, so there was no excuse for her making him wait for so long.

"Alright," Doctor Harper fetched her notebook off her desk, taking a seat on the upright office chair in front of the sofa. She always read through their last sessions together to refresh her mind, infuriating him even more as she could have been doing all of this while he was forced to wait outside. "Last session, we were discussing your relationship with your colleagues."

He knew that. He could practically recall the whole conversation, but she paused to read through her notes again. He turned his wrist to look at the time after a moment a two, realising he had been in here four minutes already. She must have been a slow reader, but he didn't even have that much to say about his colleagues. He told her the basics of his relationship with each of them, but he didn't think their personal relationships was really any of her business.

"Okay." Marilyn crossed her legs, smoothing out a crease in her pant suit. "Today I'd like to discuss your personal life. Any relationships you have, friendships..."

"Why?" He stopped her there. "I thought this was about my performance at work? My personal life has nothin' to do with that."

"If that's the way you feel." She jotted down some notes, taking at least another two minutes, before she asked him another question. She wouldn't drop the subject of his personal life, so he talked about his family, giving her the most minor details to fill the thirty minutes they had left after her long pauses to write.

Before his hour session was up, she dismissed him, giving him the dates and times of next week's appointments.

"How much longer do I have to do these?" He asked, pocketing the appointment card.

"Um..." She reached for her appointment book, looking on ahead at the dates. "You are booked in for six weeks worth of sessions."

"Six weeks?" He looked at her wide eyed, realising he still had eight more sessions with her. That was at least twenty minutes of waiting each time and more discussions about things that had nothing to do with why he was so exhausted at work lately. "If I tell you that I'm just so exhausted at work because I have a baby in my life, can we cut those sessions down?"

"No, but..." She quickly reached for her notebook to add that little detail to this session's notes. "That would have been one relationship outside of work that we could have discussed today. I'm afraid we're out of time today though..."

"If I take a maternity leave of absence," He had actually been offered it by someone he spoke to at the lab. He just wasn't sure about taking it while Sadie was still in the hospital. "Do I still have to come to these sessions?"

"I'm afraid I don't know, and I couldn't tell you even if I did. These sessions have been arranged by your employer. I report back to them. Any queries should be discussed with them. I would however like to continue our sessions."

Nick rolled his eyes, thinking 'I bet you would'. He gave out a sigh, turning for the door to leave. He felt as though he was just being severely punished lately. Ever since Grace showed up with her surprise pregnancy, everything else in his life had just been going downhill on a fast moving train that he was powerless to stop.

"What's wrong? Is she okay?" Nick rushed to his daughter's side at the hospital, seeing two of the regular doctors and three nurses around her incubator. "What happened?"

"Mr Stokes," The nicer of the two doctor's gently guided him away from the incubator for a moment. "We've just done a lumbar puncher test. It's the needle that's inserted into the lower part of the spine." He nodded in understanding as she had been through it before. "We'll get back to you as soon as we have the results. Okay, try not to worry."

If everything was fine, he knew she would have said that, but she didn't, only making him worry more. Lumbar puncture tests were for serious conditions that affected the brain, spinal cord or nervous system. He immediately feared that she had caught a more serious infection than the last, one that her tiny body couldn't handle.

The nervous father anxiously waited for them to leave, before he could take his usual seat beside her incubator. He reached his hand in through the open side door, cautiously reaching his hand out for his sleeping baby. He brushed a fingertip across her tooth pick sized arm, lifting her tiny hand between his index finger and thumb. Her hand was still barely as big as the top of his finger, but he felt the strength of her grip as she instinctively clamped her fingers around his.

Her eyes had always been closed until now, but he caught a flicker of the whites in her eyes as she started to move. Her arms at first, reaching out for the air above her. It looked like a morning stretch to wake up her limbs, but she quickly fell back to sleep. He released her little hand once her grip had loosened, laying his hand flat against her to feel her every breath. She made the softest little murmur sound after a while, opening her eyes for a second time, only she opened them all the way this time.

Just as he pictured, she had the most beautiful eyes he had ever seen.

Her big chocolate brown iris lit up her whole eye. He caught a glimpse of gold flecks around the outside, before her heavy eyelids fluttered down to hide them away again. He waited patiently over the next few hours for them to open again, but she kept them closed the whole time he was sat there.

"Is she okay?" Warrick handed his colleague the extra coffee from his hands, hoping it would get him through his next shift at the lab. He didn't seem as exhausted as he did yesterday, but now he was even more stressed, waiting for the results from the last set of tests.

"I won't know for another few hours yet." Nick raided the fridge for some food, cringing as he came across one of Grissom's weird experiments. "Why? Why does he always have to do it around our food?" He complained, fetching a sandwich of his he had left in there the other day. "He's probably growin' some weird bacteria in there, right next to our lunch."

"Yeah, it's why I order out." Warrick smirked, grabbing the fridge door before he closed it to fetch the milk. "Hey did yah hear Greggo turned down that conference? Sara said he's gone back home to his folks instead."

"He turned it down?" The Texan rolled his eyes, taking a seat at the table with his coffee. "Typical, Greg move. He could have used this opportunity to advance his career, but he just throws it away as if it's nothin'." He returned to the paperwork he had been forced to do, practically jumping out of his seat as his cell vibrated against the middle of the table.

"That the hospital?" His friend watched him anxiously flicking through his phone, realising it can't have been when he set it back down. "It can't be anything serious, right? She's in a hospital."

"Exactly." Nick grabbed the rolling biro he had dropped. "Hospitals are full of infections and viruses. She could have caught anythin' from one of the other babies in the ward. She had that last infection right after the baby next to her did. The nurses said she couldn't have caught it off him, but how else could she have got it?" He jumped forwards for his phone again, reading through another text.

"Hospital?" Warrick pried once again.

"My sister, her husband's handlin' all the legal stuff for me. Grace wants to give up custody, but she wants to take my name off the birth certificate. She's mine." He quickly stopped the man's mind from wandering. "I got the results back two weeks ago. She can't take my name off the birth certificate because I am Sadie's birth father."

"Has she even been back to see her baby yet?"

"Nope. I tried callin' her again. I got her Mom instead. She said she wants nothin' to do with me or any of it." Nick made the cut throat signal, motioning towards the doors as Sara joined them. "Do you know where Greg is? Warrick said..."

"Oh yeah, he got some bad news." Sara made her way over to the coffee pot with a fresh mug. "His Papa Olaf is ill. He's gone back home to be with him for a while, and his Mom. I spoke to him this morning, he seemed pretty upset, but his Papa Olaf's still hanging in there."

"I thought the man was already gone, the way Greg talked about him all the time." Warrick confessed, taking his coffee with him out of the door.

"Where do Greg's folks live?" Nick curiously queried, watching her grabbing the milk from the fridge.

"California, Long Beach. He doesn't want to speak to you." Sara stopped him from getting any ideas. "Every time you talk to him lately, you always make it about your problems. He didn't go to that conference because you made him feel guilty about it."

"Me. What did I do?" He looked completely offended, forgetting all about what he did to him when he found out about the conference.

"You know exactly what you did. He was ready to go before. His Papa Olaf would have wanted him to, but you made sure that he'd change his mind. If you've got a problem with him joining the team, why don't you just say so instead of taking it out on him? He's been nothing but nice to you. You're on your way to being suspended. Greg's a bigger part of this team then you at the moment."

"I'm bein' suspended?" Nick frowned in her direction, feeling his heart racing inside his chest.

"Yeah, I heard it from Ecklie the other week." Sara made her way towards the door, getting stopped by Nick's hand forcing the door closed. She wasn't even aware he had stood up until then, startling her a little. "What?"

"Do you know who filed a complaint against me? Please, this is important." He tried to keep his temper at bay as he looked into her eyes.

"It sure as hell wasn't Greg."

"I didn't say that." He kept his hand firmly on the door. "Who was Ecklie talkin' to when they said I was goin' to be suspended?"

"Grissom." She told the truth, prying his hand off the door. "He defended you though. Apparently, Ecklie thinks you have some sort of post traumatic stress disorder. He thinks you're a liability to the lab and he wants you gone."

"That's why I have to see the shrink." Nick assumed, leaning back against the wall. "Post traumatic stress from what?"

"The stalker in your house." She reminded him, giving him a smile as he had completely forgotten. "The man stalked you, slept in your ceiling, spying on you, then tried to kill you. That would make a huge impact on most people's lives. I don't know who exactly filed a complaint, but it showed up on Grissom's desk after you worked that case with Ecklie. I believe it was the case you told him that he was proof evolution can reverse." She snickered slightly at the memory.

Nick smiled back at her, giving out a sigh. He thought that someone had been out to get him all this time, but he deserved everything he got. "It was true though. He was ignorin' every shred of evidence we scraped together. I can't stand that man." He glanced towards his phone as it vibrated, taking a moment, before he picked it up. "I gotta go."

"Where?" Sara watched him quickly packing up his things.

"Hospital." He didn't see any point in lying to any of them anymore. "I have a nine week old daughter. She's in the neonatal ward at Desert Palms. Her results are back from her latest infection, so I'm goin' up the hospital to talk to her doctors. Grissom knows. Warrick knows. And Greg."

"Wow." Sara whistled, holding the door open for him. "And I didn't even know you were pregnant."

"I hid it well." He grinned back at her, pulling his bag over his shoulder as he joined her by the door. "Hey, when you talk to Greg next. Can you tell him... tell him... that I'm thinkin' about him." He really had been thinking about him a lot lately. Thinking of him being in pain over his Papa Olaf made his heart ache for him. He wanted to be there for him to be the kind of friend he really needed right now, but he knew that he couldn't. "I didn't mean to screw up the conference thing for him. He deserved it."

"He was terrified." The woman confessed, feeling bad for making him feel guilty now. "Getting up in front of all those people to present his case. He kept worrying they would judge him or throw him out for being such a rookie."

"When was he supposed to present it?"

"Today." Sara put his dream of a rescue operation aside as it was almost the end of the current day. "Go on, go to the hospital. Be with your 'secret' daughter. Greg's better off with his family during this time anyway. Would you want to be anywhere else if you were losing someone close to you?"

Nick shook his head, giving her a slight smile, before he turned away. He hurried down to his truck in the parking lot, driving straight over to the hospital. He feared all kinds of results as he made his way up to the neonatal unit, finding one of the doctor's filing away some things at the nurses' station.

"Mr Stokes," She caught his attention, ushering him towards the other end of the nurses' station for some privacy. "We just got your daughter's results back from the lumbar puncture. Unfortunately it's positive for the infection of a bacteria called Group B Streptococcus. Meningitis." She confirmed one of his worst fears. "We've started her on intravenous antibiotics, that will take a few days to a few weeks to take effect. The general rule is that they get worse before they get better, so the next few days are gonna be pretty rough on the both of you."

Nick gulped hard on all the information she had just given him, focusing primarily on the word 'meningitis'. The same bacterial infection his parents had lost a child to, and that child was almost one years old. His little girl was barely nine weeks and weak enough as it was. He started to fear that the first time he saw her eyes open would be the last now.

"I got it." Greg called through the house, running for the ringing phone in his parents kitchen. He snatched his cell up from the counter before it stopped, breathing out a soft sigh of relief as he saw the familiar name flashing across the screen. "Hey, Sara."

"Hi, is everything going okay?"

"I think so." He took a seat at the counter, brushing the bread crumbs from earlier into a neat pile. "If okay means waiting around for hours on end for results from the hundreds of tests he's been put through. He was supposed to be able to come home today, but they changed their mind after another set of results got back. Because of the chemo, he's caught another cold that's got worse and it's probably gonna take him weeks to get over. The cancer hasn't spread to his brain, so I guess that's a good thing. He's still got it all the other places you don't want it, but not in the brain has gotta be a positive thing."

"Oh... I guess that is a good thing." She agreed with him. "What about you, are you doing okay?"

"Yeah." He said it with a sigh. "I'd like to talk about anything but hospitals or cancer at the moment."

"Okay." Sara quickly tried to think of something. "Oh, so Nick told me that he has a daughter today. It's hard to imagine that man with a child. Don't get me wrong, he seems kinda like the fatherly type, but he's so... emotional and too much of a ladies' man to think about a child."

Greg threw his head back with another sigh, listening to her complaining about the man he adored for the next few minutes. It was tough to hear his flaws from a trusted friend, even though he knew a few of them were true, but he still loved him in despite of his hot headed nature.

"Oh and he told me to tell you that he's thinking of you." He perked his ears up as soon as Sara said that. "He's sorry about screwing up the conference for you as well. He's right you know, you deserved to be noticed at one of those things. You're just as good if not better than the rest of us. They coulda learned a lot from you."

"I doubt it." He stopped sweeping crumbs with his fingers, turning towards the door as his Nana Olaf walked in to get herself another drink. He gave her a smile, still noticing the worry in her eyes from across the room. She wasn't that much of a drama queen like his mother, but she wasn't so great at hiding her emotions either. "I gotta go, Sara. I'll talk to you later."

"You didn't have to end your call with your friend on my account." His Nana watched him setting the phone down, brushing the sleep from his eyes. "Go to bed, sweetheart. The results won't be back until tomorrow. You don't even have to be here at the moment. He wouldn't want you missing out on work because of him. He's always been so proud of you for what you've achieved." She playfully ruffled her fingers through his hair, pecking a kiss to his forehead. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight." He waved her off, climbing to his feet just as his cell started to ring once again. He turned it over to see who it was, gritting his teeth together as it was the unwanted boyfriend he had been trying to get rid of. If he didn't answer, he'd only bombard his parents' phone with calls until he finally got to speak to him. "Stuart."

"Hey, I stopped by your apartment earlier, but you didn't answer the door. Where you at?"

Greg glanced around his parents house, quickly coming up with a lie. "Eh... work... long shift." He couldn't tolerate the man being around his parents. He couldn't even endure him around himself at the moment. It was hard enough to break up with him the first time, making him regret calling him during his time of need even more. "I probably won't get off for hours yet."

"Nice." The man chuckled at his use of words. "Call me when you're free then. I really need to see you."

"Yeah." Greg hung up on him, dropping his head to the counter. He slammed his fist against the counter beside him, feeling the vibrations running through his head. "Idiot." He muttered to himself, quickly spinning around as he heard someone clearing their throat. "Dad... hi."

"Hi." His father stepped around him, ditching his empty coffee mug beside the sink. He folded his arms across his chest, putting his back to the sink to look at his son. "So, what's going on?"

"Nothing." He sighed, knowing how uncomfortable his father was with boy talk. He had accepted the fact that his son would never be with a woman a long time ago, but he still wasn't used to hearing his only son lusting after a man. "I'm gonna turn in. Night, Dad."

"You can't avoid talking about what's bothering you forever, you know."

"I know." He stuffed his hands into his pockets. "But this problems not quite ready to be shared yet."

"Alright, well you know where I am. Goodnight." His father waved him off.

Greg hurried up the stairs to his old bedroom, crashing straight into bed. He managed to get a few hours of sleep, before the alarm on his phone went off. He forgot to turn it off while he wasn't currently working, but he figured he'd head into work then come back again to be with his Papa Olaf. It was a four hour drive each way, but the commute would give him plenty of time to think things over.

When he arrived back at his apartment, he was surprised to see the gorgeous Texan leant against the wall beside his door. He wasn't even aware that Nick knew where he lived, let alone the fact that he would be home soon. He had only told, Sara.

"What are you doing here?" He startled the man.

"I... needed to talk to you." Nick pushed himself to his feet, taking a step away from the younger man's front door. "I'm sorry about your, Papa Olaf. How's he holdin' up?"

"Okay." Greg shrugged his shoulders, unlocking the door to his apartment. He didn't have the energy to get rid of him, so he figured listening to his apologies for a few minutes wouldn't do any harm. "He was pretty pissed that he couldn't go home with us last night. All day the doctors had been saying he could, then they got back some results of a new infection and wanted him to stay in for a few more days. The chemo has weakened his immune system, so he catches something new every couple of weeks." He ditched his bags against the wall, stepping into the kitchen to switch on the coffee machine. "You want one?"

"No... thank you." Nick closed the front door behind him, giving the younger man some space to grab himself something to eat. "I... need to apologise to you, G. I'm not gonna make any excuses, because you didn't deserve anythin' I said... or did to you. I'm just hopin' that you can forgive me and we can be friends again." He awkwardly explained, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his jeans. "G, did you hear me?"

"I heard you." Grabbing his coffee mug, Greg stepped around the older man, making his way through to his bedroom. He left the mug on the dining table, kicking off his sneakers at the foot of his bed. "But it won't work." He finally turned to look at the other man. "There's just no way I can be your friend."

"Why?" Nick gave him a confused look, remaining put on the other side of the table. "I know I probably deserve it after everythin' I put you through, but if we're gonna work together at the lab, we need to have some kind of relationship." He didn't even know how much longer he had left at the lab with his current situation, but he couldn't lose an important friend like Greg.

"C'mere," Greg ushered him around the safety of the table, while he made his way into his wardrobe for some clothes for work. "I'm not turning down your friendship because I can't forgive you. I'm turning it down... because it's tough to be around you." He dropped a clean shirt and a pair of jeans onto the bed spread. "I'll work with you or do anything to help you while we're on a shift, but I will 'never' be able to be your friend."

"Why not?" He still didn't understand.

The younger man anxiously licked his bottom lip, taking a step closer towards the confused man. He was practically stood at the foot of his bed now, making his heart rapidly skip inside of his chest. He had never been this close to his desires before. It was a lot harder than he expected to keep himself from kissing him right there and then. He had successfully moved him into the right position, but he didn't feel brave enough to take advantage of him now.

"I can't 'just' be your friend." Greg simply stated.

"Give me one good reason why."

He gave the older man a sudden push, sending him toppling backwards onto his bed. Before he had time to recover from the jolt, Greg was on top of him, straddling his hips with his thighs. He reached out for the Texan's arms at his sides, pinning them to the mattress by his wrists so he was completely pinned beneath him.

"Because I want you like this." He finally explained his reason, looking down into the older man's wide eyes. "I want you so badly it hurts my chest being around you. Being so close to you, without being able to do anything... I can't do it anymore. So I can't be your friend." He released the man's wrists, sitting back on his thighs.

He expected him to push him away, punch him or run away, but he just remained put.

Nick gulped on the lump in his throat, finding it hard to ignore the heat of the younger man's body pressed against his own. The bed he was laying on completely filled his nostrils with his delicious scent, reawakening his desires. He lifted his head after a moment, propping himself up with his elbows.

"You like me?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Greg thought he could have figured that one out from what he had just said, but he still looked completely oblivious to his feelings for him. "I don't want to be 'just' your friend anymore, because I like you so much more than a friend is supposed to. Trying to be your friend is just so awkward and painful. It's hard and I can't do it anymore."

He found it hard to concentrate with Greg still perched on top of him, but he understood what he was saying to him now. He dropped back to the bed beneath him, feeling tingles running down his spine as the younger man's scent invaded his nostrils once again. He reached his hand up to run his fingers through his hair, desperately trying to block out the image of his father coming at him with a clenched fist.

"I'm sorry." Nick finally croaked, keeping his eyes fixed on the ceiling above him. "I can't." He shook his head, trying to sit himself up, which actually made the situation worse as their mouths were only a matter of inches apart now. It made it harder to resist him in this position, but he couldn't risk everyone finding out. "I can't. I'm not willin' to gamble my life away for this."

The Texan pushed him out of the way, practically running for the exit. He didn't know what he was more afraid of; himself or the young man who wanted to jump his bones.

Greg smiled a little once he was alone, relieved that he didn't say something horrible to him before he left. He also didn't deny that he could never be with a man because he wasn't gay. That had to be progress.

* * *

 **Hi everyone. Thank you for reading and reviewing so far! Hopefully I'll have another chapter ready tomorrow, Saturday. But it's my brother's 22nd Birthday, so I'm not making any promises. Thank you! Please review.**

 **~ Holly**


	6. Chapter 6 - My Little Girl

**Chapter Six - My Little Girl**

"Ohh, let me see," Catherine reached over her cooing colleagues, grabbing one of the spare photos of the little girl in question. She originally came in the break room for a coffee, but Nick had finally got some pictures together of his daughter, after the whole lab found out about his circumstances. Telling Judy at the front desk was his big mistake, she couldn't keep anything to herself. By the end of the day, everyone in the lab knew, even the entire sheriff's department knew and they all wanted to see pictures off the little angel that had entered his life so unexpectedly.

"Wow, she's so tiny." Mandy handed over the photos she had already looked at, picking up a few more off the counter. She examined her little features closely, glancing up at Nick in the middle of the crowd. "How old is she now?"

"She's... eleven weeks." The father answered, nervously smiling in the direction of the door as his supervisor stepped in.

The older man curiously looked between one lab technician to another, wondering what the gathering was all about. He caught a photo for himself as it was passed along, flipping it over to see what all the fuss was about. Adjusting the glasses on his face, he examined the baby in the picture closely, before he returned the picture to Nick's hands.

"I'm sorry, Griss. They wanted to see some pictures."

"Some people say that birthmarks are leftover from a past life." He noticed the birth mark on the baby's leg right away. "A birth mark on the thigh is supposed to bring luck. Anywhere on the leg also means they'll be very dependant." The man flinched as Catherine suddenly slapped his arm. He didn't realise that saying that would upset the other man. He had no idea that the baby in question was currently dependant on a lot of hospital equipment to help her survive. "A heart shape like that is said to mean they will have a full life of love." He tried a quick recovery attempt.

"Thanks." Nick gathered up the photos of his daughter, prying the last few out of Catherine's hands. "Grissom, can I talk to you for a few minutes?" He turned to look at his supervisor once again.

"Yeah, I have a few minutes before my meeting. Catherine," He caught the woman before she left. "I gave Greg your assignment already. He's filling up on supplies." He motioned over his shoulder, leaving just himself and Nick left in the room. "If this is about your last session with your shrink, my hands are tied. I can't do anything about it."

"No, it's not that." Nick sorted the stack of photos, trying to put them back into some kind of order. "I know who filed the complaint against me." He knew he still couldn't tell him, but he figured he hated Ecklie just as much as he did. "I'm not sufferin' from post traumatic stress or anythin'. Yeah that stalker stuff sucked, but I got new locks and a security system. I'm fine. I've been out of focus because of all this stuff at the hospital and with Sadie... and Grace."

"And?" Grissom fetched himself a clean coffee mug. "You know that once a complaint is filed, it has to be investigated and dealt with completely. Just finish up your sessions with the shrink and we'll see where it takes us from there. I've got your review meeting at the end of the week."

"I can't lose my job, but..." He abandoned his photo sorting, looking up at his supervisor. "My career means a lot to me. I just can't do it full time anymore. As soon as my daughter, Sadie is well enough to leave the hospital..." He gulped hard, feeling his hands shaking at his sides as he finally said it out loud to the man. "I'm movin' back to Texas to be with my family. My father's settin' me up with a job at the DA's office and my mother can help me out with the baby."

"Oh," Grissom thought he was about to fight for this job, but it appeared he was admitting defeat and moving away. "The DA's office?" He cocked an eyebrow in his direction. "That doesn't really seem like you."

"It's for her more than me." Nick collected up the pictures, stuffing them into his coat pocket. "I'm sorry, I feel like I let you down... but I guess this is me givin' you my notice. Sadie won't be well enough to leave for a while yet, so I'll keep workin' until then. The latest bacterial meningitis she had really set her back. She's doin' a lot better at the moment." He quickly assured him, seeing the worry in his eyes.

Everyone always assumed the worst when he said that, but his little girl wasn't giving up without a fight, so he wasn't either.

"I'm glad to hear it." Grissom gave him a smile. "It's going to be hard to see you go. Have you told the others?"

"No, and I'd appreciate it if you let me tell them in my own time." He immediately thought of Greg, wondering if it would be easier for the younger man to concentrate with him out of the way. "I don't want them to feel like I've let them down too."

"You off to the hospital?" He finally managed to pour some coffee into his mug, catching Nick packing up to leave.

"Yeah, is that okay? I've been here since five." He pointed out the time on his watch.

"It's fine." His supervisor quickly nodded, handing him a stray photo left on the counter. "Make sure you send her love from everyone at the lab." He immediately thought that they should have done something for him. He remembered signing a card once when one of the lab technician's had her baby, but so far, they hadn't done anything for Nick. He wasn't usually the type of person that thought of these things, mostly because he was socially awkward, but he didn't want Nick to feel as though he wasn't cared about. He was a valued member of the team and it broke his heart thinking of losing him for good.

Nick made his way to the locker room for his car keys, finding himself alone with Greg for the first time since he practically declared his undying love to him on his bed. A very small, deep down part of him wished he could have done the same for Greg, but he didn't understand how much harder it was for him to be open about his feelings. As a result, they were not friends, just colleagues. He guessed that small talk was out of the question, so he decided to just act as though he wasn't even there and make his way past him for his locker.

"Are you still pissed at me that I... 'attacked' you." Greg used his quotey fingers for the alleged assault that took place in his bedroom, looking at the older man beside him. The last time they spoke was less than a week ago now, when he accused him of assault. He wasn't completely cruel to him, but he did accuse him of attacking him to get what he wanted. He thought he was going to scream rape for a second, but the older man was completely lost for words after he said his piece. "I just wanted to show you why. You were pushing me for an answer."

"You said you don't wonna be my friend." Without looking up at him, Nick pointed out to him, "You can't have it both ways, G."

"I think I can." The younger man closed his locker, lifting his kit from the floor.

"You're the one who said that just bein' my friend was too hard." Nick turned to face him, looking back into those devilish eyes that had him pinned to a mattress less than two weeks ago. "Why did you say all that stuff if you want it now? You said you'd still work with me, but we would never be friends. Emphasis on the word never."

"I don't know." Greg confessed, not even sure what he wanted anymore. It really was hard to be around the object of his affection without doing the things he wanted to do to him, but he couldn't bear the thought of never being able to speak him to again either. "Maybe we'll never be really good friends, but we pretty much 'are' friends already. I still care about you and I know you care about me, even if you aren't willing to admit it."

"If I'm your friend, does that mean you'll drop all that stuff... about likin' me?" He whispered the last part, just in case anyone outside could hear them.

"At this point, I think that's pretty much impossible. My feelings for you aren't something I can just drop. I find something new that I like about you, every time I'm with you. That's why I suggested that we couldn't be friends. Can you just tell me something honestly?" Greg kept his eyes locked on his, taking his silence as a 'yes'. "Do you like men?"

"No." Nick almost immediately objected. A hesitation like that would have earned him a beating with his father, but his answer put a smile on the younger man's face. "Why are you smilin'? You can forget about anythin' ever happenin' between us. I'm not like you, I can't be with a man."

"Okay." He continued to grin, watching the blush creeping into the older man's cheeks. "That's just the answer I was looking for."

"Stop smilin', I mean it."

"And I said okay." Greg continued to smile, seeing a helpless look in the man's eyes.

"So does this mean you'll drop it and we'll just be friends?"

"Nope." Greg shook his head. "I told you I can't drop my feelings for you. And until you admit that you do like me, we can't be friends. You're only hurting yourself by keeping it all locked inside, Nicky. Just think how happy you'd be if you allowed yourself to be who you were born to be."

"I can't 'be' gay. I don't have that luxury." Nick simply answered, grabbing his keys from his locker. "Nobody is born to be somethin' anyway, we grow into it. You chose this."

"Hardly." He huffed. "You think I want to be the way I am?" He tried to keep his cool, rather than losing his temper with the annoying man again. "I didn't chose this, it just happens to be my personal preference. And I'm perfectly okay with it."

"You haven't exactly stopped yourself." Nick put the blame on him.

"Why should I? You think everyone should be as miserable and unhappy as you? I didn't chose this. It's the way I was born. And I'm perfectly happy. Unlike you, I don't want to just bottle it all up and lie to myself about who I am. It's like lying that you don't like chocolate or pizza. This is who I am. Liking men isn't some horrible, bad thing. I fall for the person, their body is just a bonus. Just like I fall for pizza because the delicious melted cheese and pineapple, chicken topping. Men are that delicious bonus to me. I can't just deny my feelings for them."

Nick blushed a little brighter, realising he was talking about him. "You think I'm..." He nervously cleared his throat. "A delicious pineapple, chicken toppin'?"

"Close enough." Greg shrugged his shoulders, taking a step backwards towards the locker room door. "Personally, I think you are my favourite deep pan pepperoni pizza, with spicy beef meatballs, crunchy ham, melted cheese and a mouth watering gooey spicy tomato centre." He subconsciously licked his lips, looking at the scrumptious man in front of him. "It's hard to resist your favourite pizza." He gave him a grin, finally pulling the door open behind him. "Stop thinking that this part of you is wrong. You wouldn't deny that you have an arm where your arm is, would you?"

"That's somethin'... completely different." The Texan couldn't help but smile, feeling his heart racing as the younger man disappeared. He took a seat on the bench in the middle of the room to steady his hands, noticing the familiar feeling of butterflies in his stomach that he hadn't felt in a while.

Did he like Greg?

It was so hard to tell. He hadn't felt this way for another person in a long time. He definitely felt something for him. He touched his fingers to his lips, remembering how amazing his first kiss with him felt. Despite his cocky attitude, Greg was actually quite adorable.

If his kiss was anything to go by, he was also quite the romantic.

Nick quickly straightened up, trying to shake the thought from his mind. He grabbed what he came in there for, taking the stairs down to the parking lot to get to the hospital. He tried to focus on the little girl in the incubator, but he couldn't stop thinking about the younger man who made him feel warm inside.

"Good Morning, you're here early." A nurse startled him out of his thoughts, checking up on the monitors, before she joined his side. "You're looking a little happier today." She noticed. "Did you get some sleep?"

"Eh... yeah, a little."

"Good, baby needs you well rested. The trick you learn early on with a baby to stay sane is to sleep when they sleep. Trust me when I say it's the only rest you'll ever get once you've got her full time." She smiled at him. "Did you know her due date is coming up? The day she was expected to be born is the end of next week."

"No, I never knew her due date." Nick confessed, placing his shaky hands in his lap so she wouldn't see. "Does that mean she'll be able to leave soon?"

"I don't know about that. Some doctors do say to aim for the due date, but she needs to put a lot of weight on first. Actually, I was just about to give her the bottle, do you want to?"

"Yeah... please." He immediately perked up. The older nurse that was usually on in the morning never let him anywhere near her feeding schedule. She wouldn't even let him hold her if she was having a bad day.

"Do you have anything ready at home yet?" She asked, making notes of the monitors on the baby's chart.

"Yeah, I got a car seat the other day. It's still in the box, but it's adjustable for when she grows. I was gonna put it in my truck over the weekend. I've got a crib and all the beddin' set up in my room, but I don't have any clothes yet. My Mama said she's gonna grow out of anythin' I buy, so I thought I'd wait until I know when she's actually comin' home." He sat back against the chair as the woman opened up the crib, carefully lifting out his sleeping baby to put her into his arms. She made the most adorable fussy noises at first, but quickly dozed off to sleep against her father's arm.

"My son just turned four and he's growing like a weed too. I buy two sizes bigger at the stores now. He was premature. He was in hospital for five weeks. He wasn't as premature as your little girl. He was allowed to go home as soon as he reached four pounds." She shook up the bottle in her hand, before she handed it over to him. He didn't need any instructions on how to do it now. He had been shown so many times it just came naturally to him now.

"How much does she weigh now?" He queried, watching her checking through his daughter's chart.

"Let me see, she was... three pounds and... seventy five ounces at her last weigh in. That was yesterday. It's still a little on the small side for a forty weeker, but the doctors aren't too concerned since she's still recovering from bacterial meningitis. So she's almost at four pounds. But they might want to keep her in a little longer just in case. You'll have to wait and see. I can bring it up for you, since her due date is approaching."

Nick kept his eyes on the baby in his arms, watching her lips moving as she started to drink from the bottle. "Do you think she's aware?" He queried, looking up at the nurse in front of him. "Of her surroundings and the people, I mean."

"I think baby's are aware of their surroundings. A lot of them seem to do better with their family around them a lot more. Not to say the others don't, but they just seem to settle a lot better, especially with a new nurse or doctor. Will you be alright for a few minutes?" She motioned over her shoulder towards one of the other incubators.

"Yeah, thank you." Nick gave her a nod, holding his daughter's little hand as she continued to drink from her bottle. She managed to open her eyes after a few more mouthfuls, staring up at her father above her. He wasn't sure how much she could see, but this was the first time she actually locked her eyes onto his. The look in her eyes was exactly the reassurance he needed to give up his life for her.

This little girl was completely dependent on him for everything. He would always be responsible for someone from now on. That thought alone used to scare him, but now he felt more than a little excited about it.

* * *

 **Thank you for reading, please review!**

 **Have a Great Weekend.**

 **~ Holly**


	7. Chapter 7 - Let Go

**Chapter Seven - Let Go**

Stepping through the doorway of the Texan's house, Greg felt a chill running down his spine. He had seen the outside a few times, along with photographs of the inside after his house was broken into, but he had never physically been inside before. He didn't think the first time would also be the last. He carried the empty cardboard boxes through to the front room, placing them down beside, Sara. She carefully wrapped a framed photo of his family in newspaper, giving Greg a smile as she placed it into the box beside her.

"Thanks for these, Greg. We were just starting to run out." Sara pulled one closer, taking out the bubble wrap from inside. "Who'd you nab them from?"

"Mandy's lab. She just topped up her supplies." Greg stuffed his hands in his pockets, looking around the empty room. His chest ached as he saw that the kitchen and dining room were practically empty, but the place still had the scent of the man he adored inside. "There's some more in the back of my car. Shall I go get them?"

"No, here." Sara climbed to her feet, handing him a fresh roll of tape. "Take these through to Nick. He's packing things up in his room. He could use a hand."

"When's he leaving?" He only just found out two days ago at work that he was leaving for Texas. He couldn't do anything about it at the time because Nick was off work on the count of his daughter finally being home from the hospital. He was happy for him, but it was going to be sad to see him go.

"Friday. Tomorrow." Sara realised, grabbing another photo off the wall. "It's gonna be weird without him around."

"Yeah." Greg agreed with her, slowly turning for the hallway behind him. He peered in the first room he came across, spotting Warrick taking apart the pool table in the middle of the room. "So you drew the short straw?" He stepped into the room, giving the man a smile as he tried to figure out which screwdriver head would fit the one in the table leg. "Is he taking that with him?"

"No, he's giving it to me. It just won't fit through the door as is. At this point, I'm considering sawing the legs off and just having it as a floor table."

"It would make a pretty cool coffee table." The younger man smirked, leaving him to struggle with the table leg. He bypassed the bathroom on the left, spotting Nick on his hands and knees in his bedroom. He smiled to himself as he reached out for the door, giving it a light knock, so he wouldn't startle him. "Hi."

"Hey." Nick smiled in his direction, sitting back on his heels. "Isn't this a friend thing to help out with, not a work colleague thing?"

"Sara called me." Greg confessed, remaining put by the door. "She told me to bring over some boxes. They're in my car if you want me to go get them." He extended his hand out in front of him, holding out the tape to him.

"You can come in." He pushed himself to his feet, stepping around the crib set up by his bed. He leant over the side to check on his little girl, smiling as she continued to sleep away now that it was day time. She kept him up all night with diaper changes, bottle feeds or just to be held, but she had no problem sleeping while he was awake. "I can't believe she's almost four months old. She still looks like a newborn."

"Well technically, she's only four weeks old, so that's probably normal, right?" Greg remembered him telling them his baby's due date was only a few weeks ago. He took a brave step into the room, standing at the foot of the crib opposite, Nick, so he could see the baby. He had only ever seen the baby in pictures. He was one of the few people from the lab who didn't go with him to the hospital once during the whole fourteen weeks she was in there. He felt a little guilty about it, but he had his reasons. "She okay?" He thought he should ask.

"Yeah, she's not drinkin' as much formula as she's supposed to, so I have to put this other stuff in to fatten her up a bit. She doesn't like lettin' me sleep at night either." He brushed his fingertips across her forehead, gently brushing down her static hair. She had only just started to grow a few patches of hair, but it was always sticking up in different directions. "Her feet are really sensitive too. She had the IV drip and that goin' through a vein in her foot when she in the hospital, so I guess it still kinda hurts."

"Are you..." Greg glanced up at him, "Okay, I mean."

"Yeah, I'm kinda excited. You wouldn't think I would be, movin' back in with my folks at thirty four with a baby, but it's just until she's a year old or somethin'. I might even start lookin' for a place quicker than that."

"So... you're not coming back," He tried to hide his disappointment, but it was obvious to the older man that he was upset. "You know tons of people do just fine raising a baby on their own in Las Vegas. Why can't you?"

"What would I do for money?"

Greg shrugged his shoulders together. "You can stay at the lab, with us. No one would mind you bringing a baby in with you every day. We can teach her the tricks of the trade. She can work her way up. Grissom would love to teach her. He tries to make people think that's he's socially awkward, when really he loves to teach."

"Greg..." Nick stepped around the crib, joining him at the other end. "I'll come back someday. I don't know when exactly, but I'm not givin' up my career forever. I'm still a CSI, that's never gonna change, but now, I'm a father." He turned to watch his little girl snoozing away. "I didn't think we had a future together when she was born, now we have this whole life together and I'm responsible to make sure she makes it. My folks can help me with that... and I want her to know them, because they're my family."

"What about... us." He made a move for the door as soon as the words came out of his mouth, realising this was a bad idea. "Never mind... here." He placed the tape in his hand, making his escape before his emotions got the better of him. "I gotta get going anyway. Sorry I can't stick around to help."

"Greg..." The older man threw the tape onto his bed spread, catching the younger man's arm in the hallway. He pulled him back towards him with a sudden jolt, almost crashing their body's into each other. "You think I'm abadonnin' you? I already had to deal with this from Catherine, I don't need it from you too. I can't raise a baby here on my own. I really am completely on my own here. I don't even have you as a friend anymore. You made that perfectly clear to me, because I can't be... pizza." He used the younger man's analogy from a few weeks ago. "How many more friends am I gonna lose not bein' able to cope with the baby and work?"

"And you certainly don't need pizza in your life. It would only add complication to your life. Just..." Greg sighed, releasing his arm from the older man's grip. "Do what you want I guess. None of my business." He turned to make a hasty getaway this time, rolling his eyes as the stupid boxes were still in his car. He reluctantly took them back to the house, leaving them just in the doorway so he wouldn't have to see him again.

"That went well." Sara smiled in Nick's direction, wrapping up the last picture from the wall. "Pizza?" She cocked an eyebrow in his direction.

"Don't ask." He shook his head.

"Well, he'll come around when he realises it's what's best for you and Sadie."

"I don't think so." Giving out a soft sigh, Nick turned on his heels, returning to his bedroom. He took a seat on the edge of the bed, reaching for the tape from the middle. He peeled off the folded corner, feeling his heart sinking as it was probably the last time he would see Greg again. It upset him more than he liked. He felt as though he was losing a part of himself by losing him. He realised now why he was so upset, because he still cared for him. He had pushed Greg away so many times, but he still had feelings for him and it hurt to lose him.

"Hey, the pictures and things from your front room are all boxed up." Sara appeared at the doorway, looking at Nick sprawled out across his bed, staring up at the ceiling above him. She took a few more steps into the room, leaning over the foot of the bed to see what he was looking at. "Something on your mind?"

Nick sighed, keeping his eyes on the ceiling. "Everythin'... so don't ask. I wouldn't know where to start."

"Try me." Sara perched herself on the bed beside him. "C'mon, this could be my last chance to have a heart to heart with you. Confide in me, who am I gonna tell?"

"Have you ever," He pushed himself to sit up, pursing his together as he looked at the woman beside him. "Have you ever had feelin's for someone that you couldn't explain? It's just kinda there in your stomach whenever you're around them. But no matter how you try to justify it... there's just no way that you can be with them."

"Who are you talking about here?" The woman gave him a curious look, sensing he didn't want her to know. She hadn't seen him looking at anyone in that way at the lab, so she figured it was no one that she knew. "No, I can't say I have had feelings like that. Why can't you be with them exactly?" She couldn't think of any reason why two people couldn't be together, other than an age gap. "Are they seriously old? Or a minor. Are you having feelings for a minor?"

"No." Nick climbed to his feet. "He... they're the same age as me. More or less."

"He?" Sara picked up on his choice of word, dropping her jaw as she figured it out. "Greg? You and Greg."

"Me and nobody. I'm not with him and it's not him. I'm not gay. Can you just forget I ever said anythin'?" He felt his hands shaking at his sides, worrying that she might spread this around and somehow word would get back to his father. He'd lose any ounce of respect anyone had for him and the trust between him and his father would be gone.

"Okay." The woman spoke softly, looking down at her hands in her lap. She lifted her head to look at Nick after a moment or two, realising how scared he was. "You've never had feelings like this for another man before?"

"Can you keep your voice down?" He hissed, running for the bedroom door to close it. Warrick was still in the house and he was well aware of his feelings towards gay men. "No. Not really. Sort of, but it's... a really long story."

"It's perfectly okay to have feelings like this for someone. You're not doing anything wrong and generally most of the time, feelings can't be stopped, no matter how hard you try." She tried to relate to him to make him feel a little more at ease. "I remember I had this huge crush on a boy back in Highschool. He was a total dick head and treated his girlfriends like crap, but I always got bubbles in my stomach whenever I was near him. I used to imagine going on a date with him or something and he'd always be the perfect gentleman. But in real life, he was the biggest jerk I had ever met. There was this college professor once too. He was married with four kids, but I just felt... completely helpless around him."

"But I can't." Nick slumped back to the floor, continuing to fold his clothes away into the boxes. "At least you had feelin's for the right people. What I'm feelin' is completely unnatural. I'm broken."

"How?"

"Because I'm not gay." He practically snapped at her, gritting his teeth together as Sadie started to stir. He crawled on his knees towards the side of her crib, watching her making the slightest movement, before she dozed off to sleep again. "What kind of life can I offer her with that hangin' over our heads?" He whispered, looking at the woman still perched on his bed. "I can't be... that. I just can't. I wouldn't wish somethin' like this on my worst enemy. It's wrong."

"How is falling in love so bad?" Sara rolled her eyes at him. "Greg's right, you really are sexually repressed, aren't you?"

"I have a baby." He motioned towards her. "You can't be... that, if you have one."

"Oh yes you can." She smiled back at him. "You've never had a problem with anyone who is gay at work, Nick. Why do you think it's so wrong for you? Greg's gay and you've accepted him. What's so wrong with just falling in love with someone? Greg's a great guy and you both care about each other."

"I can't do that with him." Nick picked at the dust on his jeans. "I could never offer him anythin'. He'd hate me before we ever got to the relationship stage."

"So you're just scared? Everyone gets scared, Nick. It's no reason to just hideaway and hope it disappears. How are you ever going to know if things work out between the two of you if you don't give it a chance? You don't have to label yourself as gay to be with him. You can just be in love. That can't do any harm to a child. She'll just grow up with even more people loving her. And what kind of message are you going to send to her if you reject your feelings just to stay what you think is right?"

Nick let out a slight snicker, rolling his eyes as he looked up at the woman. "You know I've been forced to see a shrink for the past six weeks and she never once listened to anythin' I said. Less than five minutes with you and you're already givin' me advise."

"Well you don't deserve to be unhappy, just because he's not your usual type. So what if he's a man. It doesn't make it wrong. You never know, he might be your one true love. His packaging is just a little different to what you're used to." Sara climbed to her feet, helping him up from the floor. "Do these feelings that you have for him feel wrong? Or do they feel like love."

"Love." Nick spoke without even thinking, shaking his head as he took a step away from her. "I can't do it though. I'm not... pizza. I can't be like that."

"Like what?" She frowned at him.

"Oh... it was just... somethin' that Greg said to me. He said that denyin' myself to feel what I feel is like denyin' that I like pizza." He let a small smile spread across his lips, quickly shaking it off as he looked up at Sara. "I can't be that though. I don't have that luxury."

"Can't be what? In love. How are you ever going to know unless you give it a try? This is practically your last night in Vegas. When or rather if you ever come back, Greg might not be around anymore. He could have moved on or found someone else."

Nick didn't want him to find someone else, but he couldn't face it. "Then I wish him all the best."

"Nick, wake up. This could be your chance at happiness and everyone knows that you need some of that right now. What have you got to lose by at least going on a date with him?"

"Whoa... I just said I had feelin's for him, I never said anythin' about datin' him."

Sara sighed, shaking her head at him. "You're going tomorrow. If you don't do something now, you're going to regret it for the rest of your life."

"I already do." He let it slip, returning to his packing. "I don't have time. Or a babysitter. And he wants a boyfriend. I can't do anythin' that he would want me to do. I don't even like the thought of it." He flat out lied to her as he had practically imagined it every night since his first kiss with Greg. "I'm not gay. It's just a crush with the wrong person."

"Are you seriously willing to throw it all away just because your fear of a word? No one's going to call you that just because you're following your heart. Why would it matter anyway? If you love someone, it doesn't matter what people think of you. Me, Warrick, even Catherine, we're not going to care if you follow your heart. You're our family." Sara took a step towards the crib, watching his daughter snoozing away. "What if your daughter came to you one day and told you that she was gay? Would you reject her, tell her it was wrong or to hide her feelings so no one would judge her."

"No." Nick put his back to the opposite wall. "You don't know what it's been like for me. I can't just forget everythin' that was done to me and be with him. It's not that simple."

"What are you talking about?" She stepped in front of him, looking into his eyes as they glazed over. "What was done to you?"

"I don't want to talk about it." He simply stated, looking up at the ceiling to try and control his tears. "Can you leave me alone for a minute?" He kept his eyes up, waiting for her to leave. He slid down the wall as soon as he heard the door close, pulling his knees close to chest to let out his tears. He must have cried for over ten minutes, before Sadie awoke from her nap, hungry for her next bottle.

Pulling the sleeve of his sweatshirt over his hand, Nick gave his face a quick wipe, quickly tending to his beautiful little girl. He gently scooped her out into his arms, lifting her high enough to kiss her little chin, before he hugged her softly against his shoulder. She was still so tiny, but she felt a little less fragile then she did back at the hospital. She had only been home for eight days now, but he wasn't willing to go back to how things were before for anything in the world.

He carried her through the house to the kitchen, holding her securely against his shoulder, while he prepared a bottle. He glanced round as he heard a sudden cheer erupting from his friends, making his way into the spare room. He spotted the pool table on the floor first, before he saw Warrick holding up the last leg.

"Finally." The man giggled with Sara, handing her the last leg. "Now I just need a bigger car to take it back to mine."

"You can take the rental truck." Nick suggested, pulling the keys out of his pocket. "There's only a few boxes in there at the moment, it should fit."

"Alright." Warrick hurried around the table, grabbing the keys out of his hand. "Hey Sara, you wonna help me fix it back together on the other end."

"I'd like to say no, but it's not like I've got anything better to do." The woman sighed, lifting two of the table legs into her arms. She followed the older man out to the truck, helping him to load everything inside, before they were off, leaving Nick alone with the baby. He sat with her on the sofa as soon as her bottle was ready, looking into her little eyes as she fed. He didn't want her to ever feel rejected by him, only making him think of Greg even more.

It still wasn't possible between them, there was just no way he could allow something to happen, but he couldn't leave things how they were on his last day.

Nick tried the younger man's cell a few times, before he figured that he was ignoring him. He loaded Sadie into the baby carrier, packing the diaper bag full of things she'd need for the afternoon. He still had a lot of packing to do, but he really needed to speak to him in person rather than leaving him a voicemail, so he decided to make his way over to his apartment. He'd have to let him in one way or another.

His daughter, Sadie might help with the other.

The drive over to his apartment only took a few minutes. He spotted the younger man's car right away in the parking lot, so he proceeded up the stairs, the baby carrier in one hand and the diaper bag in the other. He didn't think it was worth investing in a stroller at the moment, but at times like this it might have been ideal. Apart from all the stairs, he couldn't imagine climbing all of those stairs with a stroller.

Once he reached the right floor, he set down her carrier beside Greg's door, giving it a light knock. He heard movement inside, but he wasn't exactly eager to see who it was.

When he finally opened the door, he didn't look too happy to see Nick in the doorway, but he didn't shut it in his face like he was expecting. "What do you want? You realise that when someone ignores your calls, it means they don't want to talk to you. It doesn't mean that you should go over to their place to talk to them, expecting a different result from the phone."

"You're talkin' to me already." Nick tried to lighten the mood. "And what I have to say, can't exactly be said over the phone. It might be easier, but it wouldn't mean the same to me."

Greg glanced down at the baby at his feet, realising he didn't have any other choice. He took a step back from the doorway, extending his arm out to his side to usher him in. He remained put as Nick lifted the baby carrier, taking it through to the front room. He reluctantly closed the door behind them, making his way back to his spot on the sofa. He watched Nick gently brushing his fingers across his daughter's little head, straightening out a few stray hairs.

"I can never get her to sleep like this at night." He climbed to his feet, taking a seat on the chair opposite the younger man, rather than beside him. It would be too awkward with what he had to say to him, but the distance between them felt a little uncomfortable too. "I... I don't understand what's happened between us. I was fine just bein' your friend before, but then you kissed me... and I can't stop thinkin' about you. I haven't thought about anybody like this since I was sixteen."

"So you admit it?" Greg allowed a slight smile to spread across his lips.

"Yeah... okay, I admit it. But it's not... I just... I don't like men." He quickly tried to object, seeing the hurt look on Greg's face. He rested his hands against his knees, looking at the younger man in front of him, confessing, "I like you."

"Okay, breathe." Greg climbed off his seat, kneeling down beside the older man as he started to breathe heavily. He looked as though he was about to throw up, but he also looked as though a huge burden had been lifted from his shoulders. "Are you okay?"

"No..." He leant back in the chair, looking out the window beside him. "I've wasted... my entire life on this fear. I told you today and nothin' happened. I'm actually quite disappointed."

"What did you think would happen?" Greg couldn't help but smile at him.

"I don't know... somethin'." He turned his head to look at Greg in front of him. "When you've been told that somethin' is bad your whole life, you kind of expect somethin' to happen to you if you take part in it. But it didn't. It just felt... normal."

"That's how it's supposed to feel, because it is a normal thing to do."

"I do like pizza." He continued with Greg's explanation of how he felt, giving him a smile. "I've been denyin' myself pizza since I was a teenager." He thought he should let go of just one more secret. "I've had relationships, but they were never real. I've been with guys." He confessed, anxiously clasping his hands together in his lap. "Before... I never thought it was a bad thing. I was brave enough and I went after this guy I liked."

"You did?"

Nick nodded, looking down at his hands in his lap. "I'd give anythin' to be that man again. I'm too scared to do anythin' about how I feel now though. I'm leavin' tomorrow and I just thought you should know that I... really like you. I can't tell you how many times I've wanted you to grab me and kiss me like you did that other time."

"Really?" Greg sat back on his heels, recalling the kiss for himself. "You acted like I had given you some sort of disease after that kiss."

"I know." Nick shamefully dropped his head into his hands, anxiously combing his fingers through his hair. "I hate myself for what I did." He stopped when he felt Greg's hand on his own, feeling a tremble down his spine from his gentle touch. "I haven't been able to stop thinkin' about the kiss." He lifted his head after a moment, meeting Greg's eyes in front of him. "Can you ever forgive me?"

"I already did." He shrugged his shoulders together, smiling widely as he looked back into the man's adorable eyes. "You really did just stop by to tell me you liked me, didn't you?"

"Not... only." The last word came out as a whisper, causing blush to creep into his cheeks. He glanced at Greg's lips, gulping softly as he realised he was so inexperienced. He had been with plenty of women over the years and they never complained, but with Greg, he felt like a complete nervous virgin again. "I... don't know how to... go about... it's all new to me."

"Not really." Greg shook his head, pushing himself to his feet. "I have the same body as you. Think about what you like. You've had sex before, right? You must have. She wouldn't be here otherwise." He motioned to the sleeping baby beside him, perching himself on the edge of the coffee table in front of Nick. "You probably know more about pleasuring a man than you think. I have the same parts, pleasure buttons..." He smiled as the older man trembled in his seat. "Do you really think I'd sleep with you before our first date anyway? I'm not easy."

"No, I never thought that you..." Nick realised he was joking as a grin spread across his lips once again. "Honestly, I didn't think guys actually went out on dates." He confessed. "I never thought there was any feelin's involved either. I thought it was just..."

"What?" He gave him a curious look. "C'mon, what did you think it was about?"

"You know..." He didn't want to say it out loud, but Greg continued to give him a curious look. "That TV show always has... sex in it. Sometimes they don't even know the guys name before they're... you know. I thought it was like that in real life."

"You watch that?" Greg gave him a surprised look. "I don't even watch that show. My Mom tells me about it often enough. She always has fears that I'm doing what they're doing. She rings me after practically every episode. I have to try and explain to her that not everyone is like that, just like not everyone is like Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and the city."

"I only caught a few episodes. So you do? Go out on dates." He quickly tried to change the subject. "It's not all like... so, could I...?"

The younger man smiled, tilting his head to the side as he looked into the other man's gorgeous eyes. He was still nervous and looked completely out of place, but at least he was trying this time. "Are you trying to ask me out on a date, Nicholas Stokes?"

"Yeah." He breathed out, his cheeks growing brighter with blush. "Is that okay if I did? I mean, that's what I usually do when I like someone. I didn't even ask if you were single though." He showed obvious signs of disappointment, even though he hadn't even answered the question yet. "I... I just can't stop thinkin' about you and I feel as though I owe it to you or I have to do somethin' about these feelin's I have for you, before I go... if I go."

"You mean... you're not going?" Greg slid to the edge of the table, looking into the man's eyes.

He shrugged his shoulders, looking at the sleeping baby beside him. "I'm not sure if I want to. I know it will be the right thing for her, but I'm not sure if it will be the right thing for me. Now that the date I'm leavin' is actually tomorrow, I'm scared that I'll lose this feelin' that I have for you, without really knowin' if I even like it. I haven't felt anythin' like this in a long time."

"What does it feel like?" He asked him out of curiosity, wondering if he really felt the same way he felt for him.

"Like my favourite kind of pizza." Nick couldn't resist saying it, placing his hands over his stomach as he looked at Greg. "I get nervous when you're around. Even when you're mad at me, I feel these bubbles in my stomach. Tingles down my spine. My hands sweat." He lifted them off his stomach to show him. "I haven't felt like this about a guy since I was sixteen. It kinda feels like I'm a teenager again. And I still can't believe that I'm even tellin' you all of this."

"I'm glad you are." He climbed to his feet off the table, reaching his hand out for Nick. He grinned as the man recoiled back a little, looking even more terrified by his sudden advance. "I'm not going to jump you. Not unless you ask me to. I just wanted to take your hand."

Nick stared at his open palm for a moment, before he lifted his own hand from his lap. He felt electricity spark through his fingers the second they touched, gently brushing his fingers across the length of Greg's fingers, before he reached his palm. It was such an innocent touch, but he felt bubbles in his stomach as their hands grasped one another tightly.

In one swift move, Greg easily pulled the man to his feet, crashing his body against his own for just a moment. He grinned examining his startled expression, keeping his hands to himself in the process, so he wouldn't scare him off too soon.

"I'm not going to hurt you." He assured the older man, looking at his lips poised in front of him. "I would never hurt you or push you into anything that you didn't want to do. I just wanted you to be honest with yourself all this time. Honest with me. You're the only man I've ever fallen in love with, without actually being with first." Greg slowly reached his free hand out, brushing his thumb across the prominent jaw line he had admired from afar for so long. "Close your eyes." He felt him shaking against him, despite the small gap between them. "C'mon, trust me. Let go of everything you're holding onto. Close em."

The Texan anxiously looked between Greg's eyes in front of him, before he let his lids fall closed. He tried to sense what the younger man was doing from the sounds in the room, but other than the delicate sound of his daughter's nose whistling as she slept, he couldn't hear a thing.

After a moment, he felt soft lips against his chin. He squeezed his eyes a little tighter, feeling Greg's teeth grazing against his skin. He felt the tip of the younger man's tongue scoring a line up his chin, before his lips merged with his own. He wasn't sure what to do at first, but the kiss was so brief, he barely had time to feel it before it was over.

"You're too tense." Greg breathed across his lips, sliding his hands beneath the older man's jacket. He swept it off his shoulders, feeling him shaking as he slid it down his arms. Greg dropped it to the chair behind him, placing his hands on Nick's hips. "Just let go, Nicky." He whispered, playfully nipping at his lips. "Nothing bad is going to happen to you."

Nick let out a breath he didn't realise he was holding in, letting go of everything he was holding onto the second the younger man's lips merged with his own. His only thought was on the man who was kissing him. He felt the bubbles and tingles rising from his stomach, filling his whole body with a feeling he had never felt for anyone before.

Greg was the one.

* * *

 **Thank you for reading! Please review. I hope you have a happy Halloween.**

 **~ Holly**


	8. Chapter 8 - Change of Heart

**Chapter Eight - Change of Heart**

Exactly seven minutes after the truck was packed up with his things, Nick felt as though he was about to have a heart attack. He thought he would feel excited about the big move away with his newborn daughter, but instead his chest felt tight, his palms started to sweat and he felt himself becoming short of breath. He returned to the empty house behind him before anyone saw him, sliding down the bare wall of his old front room to take a seat on the floor.

The only things left in his house now were his carryon luggage for the flight, along with the mountain of things he needed for the baby, making his chest feel even tighter.

He desperately tried to calm his breathing, but he started to feel dizzy and light headed. He held his chest, feeling his heart pounding heavily against the surface of his chest. He flinched back as the door beside him suddenly popped open, meaning he hadn't even locked it during his haste to get inside.

He searched around for something to defend himself with, but he could barely see through his blurred vision.

"Nick..." The adorable young man finally stepped through his front door, searching the empty place for the man. He heard whistled breathing coming from across the room, turning to see Nick sat against the wall, barely able to catch his breath. "Nicky..." He knelt down beside him. "Are you okay?"

Nick felt a little calmer the moment he looked into Greg's eyes, recalling their kiss that happened over four hours ago. "Not really." He lowered his knees to the floor, tilting his head back against the wall as he tried to steady his breathing. "I feel sick."

"Sick, sick. Or just the feeling?" Greg tried to clarify, before he sat down beside him against the wall. "It's a big move, maybe it's just regular nerves. Like the home sick feeling. You have lived here a long time. You're giving it all up now to move back to your parents house. I remember when I finished college and had to move back in with my folks. I was terrified. I never wanted to move away from them in the first place and going back after all that felt like I was taking a step back or something. I never went back in the end."

"What did you do instead?"

"Oh, I went travelling. I ditched all my stuff with them then started my travels in France. I didn't stay long. I went to Rome in Italy after that, before I went to Australia. My Nana was already there. I stayed there the longest, but I hated all the bugs and the heat, so I took a quick flight back for that year I spent in New York. I was gonna move to San Francisco after that for my first big job opportunity in some top notch research lab, but I got an interview here in Las Vegas, one of my favourite cities, so I accepted." He gave the man in front of him a smile. "Worked out pretty well in the end."

Nick smiled back at him, realising his breathing had calmed down while he was listening to the adorable man beside him ramble. "I never thought you would have been the travellin' type."

"I'm not, really. I just wanted the freedom to, but I never really liked it. My parents took me places when I was a kid, but I never really felt any freedom going places with them." He glanced around as he heard a murmuring sound, spotting a little arm stretching out of the baby carrier across the room. "I don't really get the whole protective parent thing, but I get why you're going back to your folks. It's for her benefit, so she isn't raised by a nanny or someone that's being paid to care for her. You want her to grow up with a family around her. I get that, but if you don't want to go... why go? It's not like you don't have family here. Because you do."

"Really?"

"Yeah, we're your family."

"Is that why you came? You want me to stay." He admitted that he wouldn't mind staying himself to explore their relationship a little more, but it terrified him more than the thought of moving away to become a full time father.

"I don't want you to leave and forget all about me and what you feel for me, but it's your decision to make, not mine. It's probably better if you do go though."

"Better for who? You just said that I could stay, now you want me to go again." He reached his hand out for Greg's, feeling the familiar spark of electricity as their fingers touched. "I'm not gonna forget about you or how I feel for you. I've tried to hide it all before, but it's impossible. And it's only hurtin' me. If I could... I'd be with you right now, but I'm not strong enough to take that step yet."

"If you're not strong enough now, I highly doubt you leaving will make it any easier. You could retreat back into the cold hard shell that you used to be. Completely ignoring me."

"Okay, I'm confused." Nick pulled his hand away from him. "You want me to go, but you don't really want me to go. Which is it?"

"Of course I don't want you to go, I'm not an idiot. I freaking adore you and you've finally noticed me. This is what I want, you and me together. But I don't want to be the reason that your little girl doesn't get this life that you're planning for her. For my best interests though, I want you to stay here... and be with me. It's probably in your best interest that you stay too, because I can make you happy and I'm patient. I would never do a thing to hurt you, ever. I can wait as long as you need before we get... physical." He gulped after his own explanation, leaning across his partner in front of him. He looked into his eyes for a moment, before he pressed his lips to Nick's for a brief kiss. "I don't think going back home is in your best interest."

"Oh," Nick tilted his head back against the wall, giving Greg a slight smile. "I'm homeless then. This place has already been sold. I have to be out by tonight, so the new people can move in."

"You're staying then?" He tried to hide his excitement.

"I don't want to go, not really. You want me to stay. I want to be with you. Movin' back in with my folks now feels kinda humiliating and I just know they're goin' to be so controllin' over how I raise, Sadie. I might as well take the back seat in parentin' her over there." He glanced over at her carrier, making sure she was still sleeping. She was fussy earlier while they were sealing up the boxes, but he managed to settle her after a diaper change and a stroll round the garden. If he had been back home in Texas, his mother would have taken the baby out of his arms the second she started crying, making him feel like a failure.

"Well, I have a really dumb idea," Pushing himself to his feet, Greg reached his hand out for the older man's, helping him to stand. "You can live with me. I can sleep on the couch." He quickly added, seeing the fear in his eyes. "It's not a huge place, but you can stay with me until you find a new place or something. I wouldn't mind the baby being around either. I'm a really heavy sleeper, so I doubt I would even notice. But I can help you out with her. I've never exactly taken care of a baby before, but I can learn."

"I... don't think that's such a good idea."

"Why?" Greg gently pushed him back against the wall, keeping just a few inches between them. "It won't be awkward or anything. It'll just be like... roommates or something. And we'll get to see each other whenever we want. I can be your free babysitter with a hotline to the woman who has researched practically every symptom known to man. My Mom can tell you what's wrong with her before a doctor even gets a look at her. Would you prefer to be homeless with a newborn?"

"I can't kick you out of your own bed though." He pointed out to him, considering the crazy idea for a moment. It was better than moving his whole life back to Texas, but he knew his father was going to pissed about the sudden change of plans. "And I'll have to pay my way. Utilities and all that. I'll start lookin' for a new place right away, so you won't have to put up with us for too long."

"I wouldn't mind though. If it gets too awkward, you know I'd tell you, because I don't hold anything back." He said with a grin.

"You held back tellin' me that you liked me." Nick decided to correct him.

"So did you." Greg smirked, playfully poking his side. "And I never held it back completely. I always dropped you hints. That kiss in the locker room was my last ditch attempt. I never expected you to take it like that, but it turns out it's exactly what you needed."

"What I needed?"

"Yeah, I set you free." He smiled, looking at his lips in front of him. "Like a fairytale or something, all you needed was a kiss to set you free. I'm your prince charming in this scenario."

Nick grinned back at his prince charming. "Does that make me the frog or sleepin' beauty?"

"Judging by your behaviour over the last few weeks, I'd say I tamed the angry Texan." He giggled softly, leaning back slightly to give the man some space. "Are you sure about being with me? Because once I have you, I gotta warn you that I won't want to let you go."

"As sure as I'll ever be." He placed his hands on Greg's hips, giving him a gentle push away from him. "I'm not ready for that though. You're startin' to make me hyperventilate again."

"It's cool, we can take it your pace." He stuffed his hands into his pockets, taking a few more steps away from the man. "So, you wonna see your new digs?"

Nick knew this wasn't going to be a very good idea, but he collected up his daughter and their things he was supposed to take on the plane with them, so they could make their way over to Greg's apartment. He felt a whole mixture of emotions as he climbed the stairs of his apartment building, finding his way into the home of the man he was falling for. He never realised it before, but the whole place smelled just like him. He didn't wear any cologne, it was just his natural musky, fine coffee beans scent.

Looking around the place, he realised they would have no privacy from each other. They'd be practically on top of each other the whole time, probably getting on each other's nerves before he even felt remotely comfortable being romantically involved with him. But he bit his tongue and accepted the gracious offer, feeling completely helpless to say no at this point.

"It'll just be for a few days." He set the baby carrier on the floor of the front room, looking round at Greg with his bags. "I should be able to find an apartment for just the two of us in no time. I found that place of mine in only a few days of lookin' when I first came to Vegas."

"What about your job at the lab?" Greg ditched them against the wall, handing the baby's diaper bag over to Nick.

"Grissom said I could take as much time as I needed off and my job would always be open to me." He unbuckled the straps holding his daughter in the carrier, lifting her out onto the change mat on Greg's floor. "I guess it's kinda like a maternity leave. I don't think Ecklie will be too happy about it, but I don't even know how much time I would even need to take off. I've never done somethin' like this before. When do you decide that it's okay for her be on her own with some stranger?"

"I don't know." Greg took a seat on the sofa, watching Nick expertly changing her diaper, while she curiously looked around at her new surroundings. He thought she would be much louder than she was, but she had barely made any noises. He could hear her nose whistling back in the car as she slept and she made the odd grunting sound every now and now, but he hadn't heard the deafening scream that he thought accompanied all babies.

"Does it bother you?" He glanced up at Greg, watching him turning his nose up at the sight of the dirty diaper. "It gets much worse than this, so you should speak up before we officially move in. She's on a liquid diet, so it pretty much comes out the same way. First day I got her home, her diaper completely exploded up her back. I had to learn how to do her first bath straight after that."

"Ew," Greg squirmed in his seat.

"I told you, baby's are messy. They smell, they're loud and completely dependent on adults to do everythin' for them." He explained to him, buttoning his daughter back into her onesie. "I told you this was a bad idea. This is my mess, you don't need to burdened with it."

"I'll be okay with it." He tried to assure the man, pulling his sneakers off. "I don't consider you a burden. Are you sure you don't need anything else from the truck for her?"

"No, she can sleep in the basket thing tonight. I got plenty of diapers and stuff in the bag. I didn't know how much I'd need for the flight, so I over packed a little. I'm actually kinda glad that I don't have to take her on a plane for the first time before her first birthday." Nick gently slid his hands beneath her, lifting her against his shoulder. He pressed a kiss to her cheek, holding her securely against him as he packed away the things in front of him. "So, are you sure you want us here?"

"Oh yeah," Greg pulled his feet up onto the sofa. "I'm good with it. So... what do you want to eat? I'm not exactly a chef, so it's kind of order in or nothing. Pizza?" He gave the older man a cheeky grin, getting a slight nod out of him. "You like anything on your pizza, right?"

"Anythin' but anchovies."

"Dito." He grinned back, grabbing the phone beside him to order from his usual place, leaving Nick to have a proper look around his new surroundings.

Nick stepped up to the large windows with his daughter, pointing her attention out to the city beneath them. He had seen many views of the city over the years from the various hotels and casinos that they had processed. He thought that this particular view of Las Vegas was special though as he was sharing it with his own flesh and blood.

Once he got his daughter settled after her bottle, Nick thought he should give his parents a call to let them know that he had changed his plans. He couldn't tell them the truth or the real reason why he was staying, so he just told them that he was nervous about flying with the baby while she was still so young. It wasn't a complete lie, but he still felt bad about it as he had never really lied to them before.

He returned to the apartment, expecting Greg to be freaking out during the ten minutes he was alone with the baby, but he seemed completely at ease around her.

"She sleeps a lot." Greg noticed him returning from outside.

He smiled back, closing the door behind him. "Not at night she doesn't. She's up every hour or so. She's not even hungry or wet half the time. I don't think she's used to the dark. Back in the hospital the lights were on day and night. They were dim, but it was still light. At night I have all the lights off at home, so I guess she's scared of the dark and it wakes her up."

"My closet has a light." The younger man jumped up from the sofa, stumbling over his discarded sneakers on his way through to his bedroom. He pulled open the closet door to turn the light on, closing the door slightly to show him the soft glow. "See, you can put her basket thing here. It shouldn't be too bright that it keeps her awake, but it'll be a little brighter too, so she's not scared." He looked round at Nick, seeing a smile plastered across his lips. "I love seeing that smile."

"My smile?" Nick remained put in the front room.

"Yeah, it lights up your whole face. When your mouth smiles and you really mean it, I can see it in your eyes." He made his way through to the front room, stuffing his hands into his pockets to keep his hands to himself. "So... you can have the bed." He motioned to it over his shoulder. "You wonna use the bathroom first?"

"It's a big bed." Nick let the words out, unable to stop himself from saying more. "You don't have to sleep on the sofa."

"You mean, share it?" Greg leant on the back of the chair, shaking his head as he saw the look on Nick's face. "I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable. You can have it."

"It's your bed." He practically insisted, still unable to stop himself. "I can't let you sleep on the sofa in your own house. I won't sleep there if you don't." He thought it would be awkward to share a bed with a man, especially one he had strong feelings for, but it would feel more awkward to have him sleeping across the room from him at this point. "C'mon, it's big enough for both of us."

"Okay... if you're sure. You better not hog the covers." Greg gave the man a cheeky grin. "I call dibs on the bathroom first. Oh and my side of the bed is the right." He motioned to the side closest to the window. "You'll have to fight me for it if you want it."

"You can have it." He insisted, giving him a smile. "I'd never fight you for it."

"Okay, I'll be back in a minute." Greg slipped away into the bathroom, pinching himself to make sure this was really happening. It was real alright, but he could already hear that voice in the back of his head, sounding vaguely like his mother, telling him that this was a terrible idea that would only end in tears.

Nick unbuckled his daughter from her carrier, lifting the sleeping infant against his shoulder. He lifted the Moses basket off the floor, taking it through to the bedroom to find a suitable spot for her to sleep in. Not that either of them did a lot of sleeping these days. She was up half the night in tears for multiple reasons, while he was up keeping a constant eye on her to make sure she was still breathing. He almost missed the constant beeping sound from the hospital, letting him know that her little heart was still pounding away in her chest.

Now he had to physically check her every few minutes, accidentally waking her a few times with his worry. He knew he would drive her crazy with it eventually, but he couldn't help but worry about the little life that was completely dependent on him for everything at the moment.

In the bathroom beside him, Greg had his own worries to deal with. He anxiously turned to look at his reflection in the mirror, closely examining the thick mesh of scars that covered his back. He knew that Nick had already seen them before, but they weren't exactly intimate then. People he wanted to date tended to avoid him the second they saw his scars. He thought they would just ask questions about it, but instead they went running in the other direction as though they were scared it was contagious.

He gave out a grunt of frustration, reaching for the matching pyjama top to hide it away. He buttoned it all the way up to the top, giving out a soft sigh before he pulled the door open. He never wore full pyjamas in his own home, but he couldn't give Nick a reason to leave him before they had even begun to get to know each other.

"Nice." Nick noticed his pyjamas right away. "I don't think I've actually owned pyjamas since I was about fifteen."

"I get a new pair every year from my Mom. I usually sleep in just the bottoms, but I didn't want to make you uncomfortable." He stepped around the older man, dropping down on his side of the bed. He watched the man making sure his daughter was comfortable, smiling as he glanced up at him from time to time.

"Do I have somethin' on my face or somethin'?" He eventually acknowledged the fact that Greg was staring at him.

"Nope." Greg shook his head, leaning back on his elbows against his bed. "I was just admiring you." He grinned as the older man immediately blushed. "Do you snore?"

"I don't know." He shrugged his shoulders together. "I don't exactly sleep when I'm with other people. So I've never had anyone in the position to tell me if I do. Why, do you?"

"Someone told me I wheeze, like really loudly from my nose. It used to piss him off, but I only snore if I'm really tired. Not that loudly I don't think. You've seriously never just slept beside someone?" Greg pulled his legs towards him, letting the older man sit down in front of him. "Like never? Not even once."

"No." He shook his head, pulling his leg onto the bed to face the younger man. "It's always just been me in my bed. I shared a room with my brother when I was kid, but I haven't shared a room or a bed with anyone since I was about twelve. I had my own room at the fraternity house."

"Wow." Greg whistled, resting his chin on his knee. "So tonight is your first experience?"

"Yeah, I guess it is." The Texan shyly smiled in his direction, feeling his heart racing.

"Don't look so nervous. I can still sleep on the couch if you're unsure about this." He assured him, scooting a little closer to gently place his hand on the older man's knee. "I told you, we would go at your pace. I won't do anything that you don't want to do."

"That might mean that we don't do anythin' for a long time." He felt obligated to warn him, feeling as though he should sleep in the bathroom tonight with the door locked.

"I can be patient." Greg held onto his legs as he sat cross legged beside him. "Out of curiosity, what would you normally be doing with me right now... if I were a woman?"

"You'd probably be drunk and half naked by now." He decided not to sugar coat it for him. He gulped softly, looking up into the younger man's eyes. "I lied to you a little."

"About what? The naked part or the drunk part."

"No, not that." Nick smirked, "Before." He brushed his fingers across Greg's, looking down at their hands to explain. "About never bein' with a man."

"You told me you had... sort of."

"I have... all the way." He clarified. "I was still just a kid when I was. Sixteen to be exact. He kissed me first round the back of our old school gym. He was seventeen. He had just been playin' football and caught me watchin'. He asked if I was watchin' him or the game. The second I said him, he pushed me up against the wall and he kissed me." He smiled as he recalled the memory. "It was my first kiss with anyone. He told me to meet him there after school. I was completely brickin' it the whole day, but I showed up."

Greg noticed that his smile spread a little wider. "Dare I ask. First, second..."

"No... it was just... kissin' then." He nervously smiled back at him. "He had me pinned to that wall for so long I could feel the bricks imprinted on my back when he finally let me go. I couldn't go home right away because my lips were so swollen. It was the weekend right after that, so I had to wait until Monday to see him again. Longest weekend of my life." He licked his lips, lifting his head to look up at Greg. "By Monday, he had already moved onto someone else. I found him in the same spot with another boy. I was so upset, I went to see my brother at his fraternity house after school. He was out, but one of his roommates were there. Lucas. I had seen him a few times before, but we had never really talked. He was twenty three. He offered me a beer while we waited for my brother. I took it. After one I was already dizzy. I sat down on my brother's bed... before I knew it he was on the bed with me."

"He was older than you?"

Nick nodded slightly. "At least seven years, but... he was... you know, nice. He wasn't like the football player. His kiss was... different. He was more passionate. The football guy's kiss felt like more of a hunger."

"I know the type." Greg smiled at him, sensing he was nervous about telling him the rest. The images in his mind were enough to suffice his own cravings, but he still wanted to know what really happened. "So, on your brother's bed..." He urged for the story to continue, trying to hide the obvious tent in the front of his pyjamas. "What happened?"

"He... kissed a trail down my neck." He continued with a wide grin on his face. He could barely remember anything at the time, but he could practically recall every moment of it now. "Pulled my sweatshirt off and kissed a line down my chest. I tried to stop him as he reached my jeans, but he had this sorta charm in his voice that kinda made my knees buckle." Before things got too intense and before he tore through his own jeans, Nick decided to conclude his story, saving the details for another time. "I had my first time on my brother's bed, about five minutes before he finally showed up. I thought for sure he would notice. I barely had enough time to grab my clothes, before he was through the door."

"You really went all the way at sixteen?" Greg felt a little envious of his experience. He didn't get the chance until he was twenty two to even kiss a guy. "Why..." He removed his hand from his knee, giving him a confused look. "If you went through all that so young, why did you shut it out and lock yourself back in the closet for all these years?"

"My eh... my father." He placed his hands on the bed to steady them, deciding to let Greg know something he had never shared with anyone before. "After Lucas and I were together, we sorta dated for the rest of the year. Secretly. He didn't want his friends to know and I didn't want my family to know, so we had to keep it really hidden. The day after I turned seventeen, my folks were supposed to be out all night at this dinner party thing. My sisters were at some party, so I had the place to myself. I invited Lucas over. We were in my room."

Greg placed his hand on Nick's beside him, noticing the increased anxiety in his voice.

"My father came home early. I had music on in my room, while we were..." He squeezed Greg's hand for support, gulping hard on the lump in his throat. "He hated music loud enough that you could hear it through the whole house. He practically kicked my bedroom door in to turn it off or yell at me for it bein' too loud. But then he saw... Lucas and me. Together." He breathed in a deep breath. "I froze. Completely. I couldn't... I couldn't move at all. My Dad grabbed Lucas' arm, threw him against the wall so hard I thought he had killed him. He grabbed me next, kicked me in the ribs so hard I couldn't breathe. My head hit the cabinet beside my bed..." He touched his head, feeling the scar in his hairline. "I had blood pourin' down the side of my face. He was... he was just so angry. I had never seen him like that before... I thought he was goin' to kill me."

He suddenly pulled away from Greg, climbing off the bed to pace the floor in front of him as the painful memories came flooding back into his mind. He flinched back as the younger man tried to reach out for him, showing similar signs of the panic attack he had experienced earlier that day.

"It's okay, you don't have to tell me anymore." Greg spoke softly, patting the bed beside him. "Just sit down and take a few breaths or something."

Nick eventually stopped pacing, stopping to put his back to the wall beside the bathroom door. He tried to steady his breathing on his own, sliding down the wall behind him to sit himself on the floor. "I was terrified of my own father." His voice croaked with emotion, prompting Greg to kneel down beside him to try and comfort him. "My Mama was right outside talkin' to one of the neighbours the whole time. He dragged me outside and told me to say I fell off a horse. I felt like my arm was broken. I couldn't see with the blood in my face and I could barely breathe... but I had to tell her that I fell off a horse and sound convincin'. I had never fallen off a horse before in my life... with my father right beside me, she seemed to believe every word I said. He drove me to the hospital like nothin' had happened."

"Nick..."

"After that, he gave me a choice. In the hospital." He continued, tilting his head back against the wall. "Option one, he kicked me out. Told everyone what I was and I would never be allowed to go home again. Or option two..." He turned his head to look at Greg, feeling ashamed of his choice. "It was... kinda like a mental institution or a hospital. He said he wouldn't tell anyone about me and I'd be allowed back home if I served my time there to get it out of my system. He told them I hurt myself. He managed to convince them that I was crazy or somethin'. Delusional. No matter what I told them, they never believed me."

The man paused to breathe heavily, realising he shouldn't be laying this much information on a potential boyfriend, but he had more trust in Greg than anyone he had ever met.

"My first night there I was strapped down to the bed. Sedated. They were convinced I was goin' to do somethin' horrible to myself. They were constantly supervisin' me and treatin' me as if I was... crazy. I started to believe that I was. I don't think I slept at all the first week. The rest of my family thought I was at camp or somethin'. When my father was finally convinced that I wasn't... gay anymore, he let me come home. I had to act as though I had been at this brilliant camp... when really I had been livin' my nightmare. He threatened to send me back for longer if I ever did it again, so I guess my fear just kinda blocked it all to the back of my mind."

"I didn't know they could do that." Greg spoke softly, lifting Nick's hand from his side to hold in his own. He started to understand him a little more, even though he couldn't imagine how it must have been for him.

"When I got home, I did what he wanted me to. He always threatened to send me back if I didn't. I thought I just had to hold on until I left for college, but I was... I was too terrified to even think about a man in case he found out." He gripped Greg's hand tightly, tilting his head back to look at the ceiling once again. "And I hadn't... not really. My fear of bein' back there made it... forbidden, too scary to even think about. I moved here to Las Vegas to put some distance between us. I tried to... let it go. I have these panic attacks... like clockwork whenever I even thought about bein' with someone I wanted. That day you kissed me, my panic attack was so bad I imagined myself back there. Trapped. No one listenin' to me. I have this fear that if he wanted, he could have me locked in there for the rest of life. Who's goin' to contend a Judge?"

"Me." The younger man spoke softly, gently brushing his thumb across the man's hand to sooth him. "You don't belong in one of those places, Nicky. Not for this." He cautiously reached his hand out for him, turning Nick's head so he could look into his eyes. "You're not going back there. You're safe with me. I'll never let him hurt you."

Nick kept his eyes on the younger man for a moment, feeling his breathing beginning to calm on its own once again. It usually took him at least an hour to completely calm himself down, but with Greg, he started to feel safer and more relaxed in less than a few minutes.

He lowered his knees in front of him, bravely reaching forwards to pull the younger man a little closer. He examined the golden flecks in his eyes, before he initiated his first kiss with the man.

It didn't last as long as Greg would have liked, but it definitely left him hungry for more.

* * *

 **Thanks to one of my fans who contacted me last night after having her second child in hospital, letting me know that she loved the name Sadie from my story so much that she's decided to name her little girl, Sadie. Congratulations. I wish you both well. Enjoy your little Halloween treat.**

 **Thank you for reading. Please review. Hope you all have a great weekend.**

 **~ Holly**


	9. Chapter 9 - A Little Closer

**Chapter Nine - A Little Closer**

"Nineteen weeks," Nick stated his daughter's age to the second curious woman at the grocery store. He was used to the attention she brought now, but it wasn't exactly welcomed. He had been staying with Greg for the past four weeks now and things were still slow and slightly awkward. The last thing he wanted was female attention to add to the confusion of his life. "She was premature, that's why she's so small."

"She's beautiful." The woman leant a little closer, looking at the beautiful little girl asleep in the carrier on his shopping cart. "What's her name?"

"Sadie." He got a funny look from the first woman, but this one seemed to like the name. "I named her after my grandmother."

"I think it's a beautiful name. A beautiful name for a beautiful little girl. She's gonna get spoiled by you." She grinned at the man in front of her.

A smile that used to give him a clear sign that she was interested in him, but he had no interest in living the lie any longer. He found a polite way to put her off any further interest in him, so he could return to his shopping trip. He was only halfway through his list and his daughter was due her next bottle any minute now. She seemed content at the moment, but he didn't want to take any chances and wait for the meltdown.

He took what he had to the checkout, biting his bottom lip as Sadie started to fuss. She wouldn't take her pacifier and her cries only got louder as he packed away the groceries. He quickly pulled his wallet out to pay for it, avoiding the looks the other customers were giving him as he made his way out of the store.

When he reached his truck outside, he realised the reason why she had been so upset. Her diaper had completely exploded up her back, causing an obvious discomfort. He had to stay put in the parking lot for a while longer, completely changing his daughter out of her messy clothes, before he tried to clean the carrier with nothing but a few baby wipes.

"Thanks for that one, baby girl." He smiled at her, lifting her back into her clean carrier. "Oh you're gonna go to sleep now are you. Don't let me disturb you." He loaded her back into the car, making his way back to Greg's apartment. He thought the horrible day was finally over, but one of his grocery bags split on the stairs, sending the baby formula and diapers rolling down the stairs behind him.

Nick gave out a sigh of relief once he was inside, crashing against the sofa with his daughter and her bottle, feeling completely exhausted. He barely slept a wink last night. Greg was out all night on shift, so it was just him and the constant cries of his little girl. He was out of the house before Greg got home for a doctor's appointment with Sadie's paediatrician, followed by a lunch date with his sister to meet his daughter for the first time and then the dreaded shopping trip that took much longer than expected.

About five minutes into Sadie's bottle feed, Greg's landline started to ring. He generally ignored it as no one actually knew he was living here, letting the machine get it instead. After three long drawn out rings, the call went straight through to the robotic female voice of Greg's answer machine.

"Please leave your message after the tone."

"Hi Greg, it's Stuart. You know, your boyfriend." The man on the machine immediately caught Nick's attention. "I haven't heard from you since your Papa Olaf came out of hospital. I hope he's okay. Can you give me a call back? I'm worried about you. Okay... bye."

Nick tilted his head back against the sofa cushions, feeling his heart aching inside of his chest. He felt betrayed, angry even. Greg had lied to him. He had been sharing a bed with a man who had been sleeping around with someone else the whole time.

Worst of all, he had trusted him. He let him kiss him. He had never put that kind of trust in someone before. To have it betrayed like that felt like his heart had been ripped out of his chest.

He decided that this was exactly the motivation he needed to move on from Greg's apartment and find his own place, where he could properly raise his daughter. As soon as she was down for her nap, he started searching the local listings, finding one in the exact same building he was staying in right now. It would have been easier, but he didn't think he could bear to be that close to someone who had betrayed his trust.

An hour later, Nick had narrowed his choices down to three places that were in his price range. He was dying to get his things out of storage, so he chose the unfurnished open house to take a look at that afternoon. It wasn't as grand as the paper described and the second bedroom was practically a cupboard, but it was in a nice enough location.

"Mr Stokes," The realtor finally said goodbye to the couple she had been showing around, turning her attention towards the man holding his daughter by the window. "Have you had a chance to look around? Did you see the kitchen?" She motioned over her shoulder. "All new fittings. The carpets in here are only a few months old and the bathroom was refurbished about six months ago."

"Yeah." Nick nodded slightly, patting his daughter's back as she made soft grunting sounds against his shoulder. "There's no garden?"

"The garden is all out the front of the house. The previous owners laid the concrete for the driveway, but there's still some room for a garden out there."

The Texan turned away from her to examine the rest of the house, rolling his eyes as the front garden was right next to the busy main road. There was no way it would serve as a safe place for his daughter to play once she was a little older. It wasn't fenced in and the concrete drive took up most of the space. "I'm lookin' for more of a family home. And fast. I've gotta move out of my current livin' situation pretty quickly."

"I have plenty of full sized family homes available. What's your price range?"

"Somethin' along the lines of this." He confessed, watching the realtor sucking in a sharp breath through her clenched teeth. "I shoulda left when I had the chance, but I can't go back now." He didn't make much sense to her, but Texas was completely out of the question now. His parents were too mad at him to even answer the phone after he changed his plans and his feelings for Greg were too out in the open to hide anything from his father anymore.

Ditching his escape plan, Nick reluctantly returned to the betrayers apartment, hearing the shower running as he stepped inside. He set his daughter down in her crib, taking a seat on the edge of the bed to wait for Greg to finish up. The longer he waited, the more annoyed and wound up he started to get. He felt as though he was going to put his fist through a wall at one point, then he stepped out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist, water drops still running down his chest.

He was so gorgeous.

"Oh, hi." Greg greeted him with his familiar sunny smile. "I thought you were out."

"I was."

Greg sensed some hostility, but he needed to get his clothes off the bed beside him. He held the towel tightly in place, keeping his back out of the man's sight to grab the fresh clothes he had laid out for himself. "So eh... how was your day?" He made awkward small talk, stepping backwards with his clothes in his arms.

"Rubbish." Nick leant back on his hands, feeling his emotions running wild as he looked Greg up and down. "Yours?"

"I drew the short straw with Sara. I had to trudge through a drainage vent thing to search for our vic's missing jewellery." He backed up towards the bathroom door, unable to hold his tongue any longer. "Did I do something? I haven't seen you awake in nearly two days now, so it can't have been something that I said."

"You got a message, on your machine." He pointed over to it.

"I did?" Greg had walked straight past it on his way in, so he didn't even notice. He feared it was some embarrassing message that his mother had left, but she always rang his cell now and by the expression on Nick's face, it was a lot more serious than something his mother could come up with. "Who from?" He knew he probably shouldn't ask, but he just couldn't stop himself.

"Your boyfriend... Stuart. When exactly were you goin' to tell me that you sleepin' around with some guy?" He gave him an accusing look. "You never told me that you were involved with someone."

"Did he say that? Because he's lying if he did. I haven't slept with him in months. I broke up with him... last year."

"He knows that your Papa Olaf is out of hospital. That was two weeks ago. I've been here for four weeks." The Texan put all the evidence together for him, catching the younger man gulping as he took a step towards him.

"I'm not lying about this, Nick. You have to believe me. I haven't slept with him since last year. He was... is my ex boyfriend. He cheated on me, so I broke up with him. I called him when I needed somebody to talk to with all this stuff going on with my Papa Olaf, when you and I weren't exactly talking, but we haven't been physical since... last year." Greg desperately tried to explain to him. He ditched the pile of clothes in his arms on the floor, holding the towel in place as he sat beside Nick on the bed. "We're not dating anymore though."

"Why would he think that you were then?" Nick turned his head to the side to look at him.

"Because... that's what he does. Nothing would convince me to take him back, so he has to lie about it. He lied to me all the time. He was sleeping around behind my back for months before I even found out. He's an asshole, but he was always a good listener. He was my friend long before we ever dated. I knew what he was like then, but I liked him. I've only been in touch with him since Papa Olaf went into hospital. We just talk." He looked the man in the eyes as he said it, slowly reaching out for the man's hand on the bed. "I swear, nothing has happened between us in months. I don't even talk to him in person. It's only over the phone."

"You talk to him? Only talk." Nick found that hard to believe as any guy would be lucky to be that close to Greg. "Why can't you talk to me? Is this still about the friend thing? You still don't want to be my friend because you have feelin's for me?"

"You have enough going on lately." He pointed towards the crib beside the bed. "You don't need my drama added to that. If I could get rid of him. I would. Stuart's the kinda guy who doesn't understand the word no. It took me long enough to get him out of my life the first time, now he's back and he thinks I just need time to get used to the idea. I just needed somebody to talk to and I stupidly picked him. He doesn't mean anything to me now. I swear. And you already 'are' my friend. I can't just cut that part of our relationship out."

"I'm not the jealous boyfriend type. But hearin' that message really hurt."

"Boyfriend?" Greg picked up on the word he used. "You consider yourself my boyfriend?"

Nick let a slight smile spread across his lips as he gave him a nod. "What would you call it? I've been sleepin' beside you for the past four weeks. Sharin' your apartment. Kissin' you. Call me old fashioned, but I consider that some kind of commitment to each other. I can't do all those other things that you do with him, but I'm tryin'."

"I don't do anything with him." Greg tried to assure him again. "Besides talk. I can pull my phone records if you want. You can see the four or five minute phone conversations we have maybe once a week in black and white, if that makes you believe me. You and I have longer conversations than that over breakfast. Besides, when would I have the time to cheat on you?"

"Not helpin' your case, G."

"I'm serious. When I'm not in the apartment with you, I'm at the lab working. You know where I am twenty four seven. I wouldn't have any time to do something with another man."

"How long did you date him?" He lifted his eyes to look into Greg's once again. He was hoping to catch him out on a lie, giving him a reason to move out.

"About... a year. Last year. We broke up a few times before, so it wasn't a whole year. He was really possessive and got annoying, but he always managed to charm his way back. After I caught him with someone else in the act though, that was it. I don't even have feelings for him anymore. Except for a seething hatred, I guess."

"I hate this." Nick suddenly pulled away from him, climbing off the bed. "I can't even stay mad at you anymore. You lied to me. You've been hidin' this huge thing from me, but I can't... all I can think about is kissin' you and you lookin' like that isn't helpin'." He tried to look away from the water droplets running down his chest, but it was too much to bear.

"Maybe that's a good thing." Greg tried to suppress his grin. "It must mean you like me and you trust me or you'd still be mad at me. You can trust me, you know." He assured him, extending his hand out to the older man. He waited for him to take it, before he gently pulled him back to the bed to sit him down beside him. "I would never purposely do anything to jeopardise our relationship. You have no idea how long I've waited to be this close to you." He brushed his thumb across his partner's hand, looking into his eyes. "I wouldn't do anything to intentionally hurt you. I want to protect your heart, not break it."

Nick smiled back at him, bravely putting his arm around the younger man's body. He leant forwards to capture his lips for a kiss, sliding his hand round to the small of his partner's slippery back. He held him close as he took control of the kiss, feeling brave enough to take their relationship one step further. He slid his arm further around Greg's back, sliding him further towards the middle of the bed.

"Ah... my leg." Greg squirmed to free his trapped leg, smiling against the older man's lips. "Don't worry about it."

"Sorry, I usually..." Nick moved his legs to straddle the younger man's hips, realising how different things were already. He tried not to let it get to him, but after a while, it started to feel unnatural. "I can't..." He pulled back from his lips. "Can you move your legs?" He climbed off him, motioning for Greg to separate his legs. "I can't do it the other way. It feels weird."

"That's fine." The younger man loosened the towel around his waist, spreading his legs so his partner could resume his role as the dominant top. He grasped the man's belt buckle to pull him closer, letting him take control from there. He still wanted to do a million things to the gorgeous body on top of him, but he promised that he would go at his pace. Even if it was painfully slow, he suspected that Nick was well worth the wait.

A moment later, he felt the older man's hand sliding up his thigh. He didn't quite make it all the way up, but he pulled his thigh tightly against his own hip, grinding their hips together for the first time. The belt buckle between them pinched a little, but he wasn't about to complain. He could practically feel him completely for the first time and nothing could take that away from him.

Except... the crying baby.

Greg refused to let him go at first, pulling him in for another kiss, before the man pulled away to check on his daughter. He scooped her out to change her diaper, getting her changed as quickly as he could, leaving the younger man patiently waiting on the bed the whole time.

"I hope you washed your hands." Greg grinned up at him, feeling his heart racing as the older man returned to his position between his thighs.

"I did." He rested on his hands either side of Greg's head, looking down into his eyes. "I almost moved out today." He confessed, seeing the surprise in his eyes. "I thought you were cheatin' on me, before we had even been... together. I took a look around this horrible little house with Sadie. She didn't seem too fussed about it, but it was smaller than this place."

"What made you change your mind?"

"You." He lowered himself to his elbows, bringing their mouths closer together for a brief kiss. "I suddenly couldn't bear the thought of bein' away from you. I thought that this arrangement we have would be really awkward and end up drivin' us apart, but I'm fallin' for you." He pressed his lips to Greg's, breathing in his delicious scent. "I can still look for a place if you've had enough of us."

"No, I love having you here. Both of you. You can stay as long as you like." He tilted his head back as the older man kissed him again, feeling the full weight of his body as he finally relaxed on top of him. "So far, the whole boyfriend, roommate experience has been pretty good. You don't take too much time in the bathroom, you always clean up after yourself in the kitchen and you make the bed every morning, do my laundry at the same time as yours." He playfully bit the older man's bottom lip, pulling him in for a kiss. "I could definitely get used to this."

"Me too." Nick nervously circled his fingertip across the younger man's bare shoulder. "I think we should go on a date."

"A date?" He shivered as Nick's finger traced a path down his arm. "Me and you, in public."

"You don't think I'm ready? I haven't had a... thing in almost three weeks now."

"By a thing, I assume you mean a panic attack. We haven't done anything to bring one on." Greg pointed out to him, wondering why he was trying to dissuade the man from actually dating him. "This is the closest we've been in... since we started dating... or living together anyway. I don't want to scare you off by going out in public too soon. You're okay when it's just us."

"I think we can handle dinner or somethin'. I just," Nick paused a moment, looking into the younger man's eyes. "I don't want to sleep with you before we've been on a date. I've had more one night stands than I can remember. I don't want what I have with you to end how they ended. We don't have to go public... I just want to go on a date with you. I can't sleep with you until I've wined and dined you. My Mama taught me manners. She taught me how to cook too, if you dare to try my food." He smiled against his lips, feeling comfortable enough to move his hand towards his bed mate's hip. "I can pretty much make you anythin' you want. I can't do anythin' fancy though."

"A boyfriend who cooks. Mom would be proud." Greg smirked, hooking his thumbs into the belt loops of Nick's jeans. "I eat anything, so I'd be happy whatever you serve me. I don't think I've ever had anyone cook for me, besides family."

"I can cook for you. Every day if you want. Stop you eatin' those disturbin' lookin' microwave meals."

"They taste better than they look."

"I doubt that." He chuckled softly, brushing his nose against the side of Greg's, before he pulled him in for another kiss. It felt completely natural to kiss him now. It still gave him butterflies, but it felt like more of a happy feeling then one of nervousness. He pulled back slightly to look into his eyes, whispering, "So, is that a yes?"

"Okay." Greg smiled up at him.

"Good. How about tomorrow night? I'll cook you dinner. Catherine said she'd be willin' to babysit for me whenever, so I can leave Sadie with her for a few hours. We'll be alone that way with no interruptions." He felt bubbles of excitement stirring in his stomach. "Okay, tomorrow night. It's a date." He sealed a quick to his partner's lips. "I should get Sadie's bottle ready. Are you ever gonna put some clothes on?"

"I thought you like looking at me like this?" Greg teased, capturing the older man's lips for one final kiss. He was relieved that Nick didn't have a panic attack once during their time together, but it was still a little disappointing that it was over so soon.

* * *

 **Thank you for reading! Please review.**

 **~ Holly**


	10. Chapter 10 - Relatable Incidents

**Chapter Ten - Relatable Incidents**

Gritting his teeth together as he stepped into the conference room, Greg gave his supervisor a nervous smile, before he slipped into one of the seats at the back. He was nearly an hour and thirty minutes late for work, so he knew there was going to be hell to pay, but he couldn't give the real excuse of the baby keeping him up all day as no one besides Catherine even knew that Nick was still in Las Vegas, let alone staying with him. He finally managed to get some sleep after Nick left the apartment with the baby, but he slept straight through his alarm, making him late for one of the most important days of work.

"Okay, that's it everyone. Greg..." Grissom called him out, ushering him towards the front as everyone filed out of the room, taking a suspect sketch each from Sara at the door. "Where have you been? You were over an hour late. We're on an amber alert."

"I figured." Greg spoke softly, gritting his teeth together again as the man glanced up at him. "I'm sorry I'm late, I slept straight through my alarm... but I'll make up the time."

Grissom gave him the death stare for a moment, before he handed him the notes from the table in front of him. "I assume you missed most of it, so look through this to catch up. Once you've finished with that, you can meet Warrick at the primary scene. There's not much of a scene, so I need your A game today to gather any available evidence we can find."

"On it." He nodded, taking a step back to give the man some room to clear away his things. "I know this is probably a bad time to ask, but can I have a few days off next week? For my Papa Olaf, he's going back into hospital for an operation..."

"Greg, why are you still here?" He interrupted the younger man. "Ask me again next week, this is more important at the moment." He lifted his suitcase from the table, cocking his head to one side as he smelt something familiar. He turned to Greg to sniff him, giving him a curious look. "Have you seen Nick?"

"No..." Greg felt his cheeks flush as he sniffed himself. He couldn't smell anything, but his supervisor always did have a heightened sense of smell. "Why?"

"No reason." He shrugged his shoulders together, making his way over to Sara at the door. "You and I should head over to the house, speak to the parents. I'll resupply my kit then meet you by the car."

"Okay." Sara smiled at him, turning to give Greg one of the mug shots that were sketched by the parents description of the kidnapper. "You look exhausted."

"Duly noted." He turned the sketch to take a look at it. "Great... normal, plain, unrecognisable."

"Did you hear how it happened? The parents left the stroller by the car to have an argument over money. They just walked off and left their child alone and unattended. When they came back, the stroller was empty and they started yelling at each other. A passerby called the police for a domestic disturbance."

"How'd they come up with this then?" Greg glanced up at her.

"First officer on scene asked them if they saw anyone suspicious when they arrived at the park. The father said he didn't see anything, but the mother worked with our sketch artist and came up with this. He was wearing his hood up, hanging around beside the ice cream stall. I already sent one over to Warrick, he confirmed that the guy at the ice cream stand saw the same guy. He didn't see the actual kidnapping though. No one seemed to see anything other than the parents arguing."

He suddenly felt slightly more sympathetic towards these kinds of cases after living with a baby for four weeks. This was one case that he really didn't want to get stuck into after spending time with a young baby. "How old is the child?" He queried.

"Ten months."

"So a baby?" Greg clutched the file in his hands tightly against his chest, trying to put Nick and his baby to the back of his mind for this case. It was a lot harder than he thought it would be though. He found himself a little choked up when he arrived at the scene, seeing the empty stroller in the middle of the sectioned off area. He grabbed his kit from the seat beside him, gulping hard before he made his way over to Warrick. "Hey."

"Hi." Warrick continued dusting the stroller for prints. "I haven't searched the car yet. It's doubtful you'll find anything, but it's worth a shot. Grissom wants it checked here, before we take it back to the lab for processing."

"Okay." He carefully stepped around the stroller, going for the passenger side door of the parents car. He pulled his camera out of his kit first, taking a few pictures of the front, before he started looking around. "There's a ton of final demands in the glove compartment." He held them up to his partner outside the car.

"Parents story was that they were fighting over money. This was supposed to be the father's day to take care of the baby. Court recommended they meet somewhere public after all the domestic disturbance calls to their old residence. I guess it didn't work out this way either." He climbed to his feet with a sigh, looking at the dozens of partials he managed to pull off the stroller. "These will take hours to process."

"Hey, look at these." Greg pulled out a set of surveillance photos from the glove compartment. "Is that the Mom?" He held them up to the older man.

"No..." Warrick leant a little closer. "This is the Mom's car. Looks like she's been keeping tabs on her ex husband and his new girlfriend, maybe? I'll make sure Brass gets a look at these. See if we can track this woman down. Good work, Greggo."

"Thanks." Greg moved to the back of the car, snapping a few pictures of the car seat still strapped in and the few toys that were left on the other seat. "Hey, there's no diaper bag." He turned towards the stroller, realising it wasn't on there either.

"Kidnapper must have took it." Warrick assumed, watching the younger man curiously as he scanned the area. He followed his gaze across the park, towards the multi coloured picket fence posts in the distance. "What are you thinking?"

"I don't know yet." Greg handed his camera over to the man, leaving the scene to check something out. As he suspected, the brightly coloured fence surrounded a kindergarten. He peered around the side at the car park, before he glanced back at Warrick in the park. It would have been an easy getaway for someone carrying a baby, especially with the parents arguing the other side of the park. "Excuse me." He caught the attention of the woman taking the trash out. "Hi, I'm Greg with the Las Vegas crime lab." He motioned over his shoulder towards the police surrounding the park. "Does that camera work?" He pointed to the camera on the outside of their building.

"Yes, it does." She nodded, putting a smile on his face. "It's all backed up on the office computer. We have another one watching the car park." She led him round to the main door, taking him through to their office computer. He found the approximate time frame of the kidnapping, realising Grissom was going to love him.

It didn't have a great view of the park, but he could easily see the woman from the surveillance photos carrying away the ten month old baby and diaper bag to her car.

He took it back to the lab to have Archie analyse and enhance it a little more, while he tried to find an ID on the mystery woman. Grissom wasn't as impressed as he hoped he would be with the CCTV footage, only making him more determined to crack the case.

"Got her." Warrick startled him, bringing a file into the lab Greg was sat in. "Her partial prints were on the stroller. Mandy just finished going through them and managed to match a few to this woman." He opened up the file in front of the younger man. "Francesca Hart. She's got priors for larceny."

"That's her." Greg compared her mug shot with the surveillance photos from the mother's car.

"I've sent it to Brass already, see if he can pick her up. Griss is back and he wants to see you in his office." He quickly added, lifting the file from in front of him. "Hey, have you heard from Nick?"

"Nope." He continued the lie, feeling bad as he reluctantly climbed to his feet. "He's probably really busy with the baby or something." If Nick was happy to let him tell them the truth, he would, but his boyfriend wanted their relationship and situation to remain safely just between them, so that's what he did. "Grissom." He knocked on his supervisor's door, before he stepped inside. "You wanted to see me?"

"Yes." The man retrieved a form off the top of his desk, handing it over to Greg. "Fill out the dates you need to take off next week. Give it back to me whenever."

"Thank you." He looked at him surprised. "It should only be two or three days."

"Take as long as you need. With Nick away, Ecklie is looking to hire a temporary replacement that might become part of the team someday anyway. Nick will always have a place here, but we're going to need someone to pick up the slack while he's away." Grissom grabbed his car keys off the desk, picking up his kit from beside it. "I'll take a look at that security footage you found when I get back. I'm meeting Sara to search the father's house. Judge put a warrant through after you found out that his girlfriend was the one with the baby."

"Oh, Mandy managed to get an ID on her from the partial prints on the stroller. We should be able to get an address on her soon. From the footage, she doesn't look like she wants to harm the baby. She might just be trying to get her boyfriend more access to his child. He has her one day a month at the moment. I'd say that's a pretty good motive for kidnapping."

"Let's hope you're right." The man grabbed his jacket on the way out the door. He stopped at the doorway, turning back to look at the youngest member of their team. "Good work, Greg." He gave him some recognition for his efforts.

Greg didn't have to wait too long before Warrick found them an address, giving them the opportunity to head out into the field once again. He felt both anxious and excited about the search of the girlfriend's house. He was hoping they would find the baby, but he had to keep his expectations realistic on this job.

He stared up at the house as the deputies cleared the house, trying to picture what kind of person she was by the wallpaper and curtains that he could see through the windows. Downstairs on the left was a deep red. He guessed it was the front room, but he wasn't close enough to see the furniture inside. On the right was a lot lighter. One wall looked pale blue, while the other was tiled at least halfway. He noticed some movement in one of the upstairs windows, followed by the continuous sound of the deputies giving the all clear for all the rooms.

"Our turn." Warrick picked up his kit, leading the way inside. He scanned the front room first, before he made his way through to the kitchen to look around. "Today's date, a time and the park written on the fridge." He pointed it out to Greg to photograph. "Nothing is ever that easy."

"Could be." Greg snapped a few pictures of it, feeling his phone vibrating against his hip.

He waited until he was alone to retrieve it, reading the latest update from his mother on his Papa Olaf. He had been taken back into hospital again, but she told him not to worry three or four times in the long message, promising to keep him updated if anything changed.

"Hey," He found Warrick in the other room. "I found an invoice for a rental truck that she hired yesterday. It doesn't look as though any of her furniture has been moved out... or in recently."

"Maybe it was for the boyfriend's house. They could be moving in together. Seems a little too soon, especially with a kidnapped baby, but couples always do crazy things."

"Says the man who had an overnight wedding without telling anyone about it." Greg felt a little hypocritical as the sentence came out of his mouth, realising he had done exactly the same thing with Nick. Less than five minutes after finding out that a relationship between them could have been a possibility, he was inviting him to move in with him and become his live in boyfriend.

"I hope Griss and Sara are having better luck than us." The man sighed, pushing another drawer shut. "Where would you take a baby that you kidnapped for your boyfriend?"

"I don't know." Greg shrugged his shoulders together, thinking of the first thing that Nick wanted to do once his daughter was out of the hospital. "Home to Mom? Maybe she didn't know that it would be reported as a kidnapping if she did it for her boyfriend. She looked as though she really cared about the baby on the footage, not like most kidnappers."

"If he did ask her, why would he get the police involved and play dumb? She could have been working alone. She wanted the baby that the other woman had to tie down the guy. We've seen it happen before. C'mon, let's head back to the lab." He grabbed for his kit, leading the way back to his car outside. He was disappointed that they hadn't really made a dent in the case, but at least they had narrowed down the list of places the baby had been taken.

Greg reached for the door handle as soon as they arrived back at the lab, spotting his boyfriend's truck parked in the distance. "You go ahead... I'll catch up." He left Warrick to carry the box of evidence upstairs, worrying that something was wrong as he weaved through the cars, towards where Nick was parked. "Hey," Greg climbed in the passenger side, checking on his daughter fast asleep in the back. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, your Mom called your apartment. I wanted to see if you were okay. Catherine said you were out, so I thought we'd wait until you got back."

"Did she leave a message or did you talk to her?"

"I spoke to her. How does she know I even live there?" He gave him a curious look.

"Because I told her." Greg grinned through his teeth. "Sorry, but she's my Mom. I can't lie to her. I let it slip that my roommate was making sure I ate three meals a day. She asked how I managed to find the space for a roommate and I sorta said that we share the bed, which only peaked her interest even more. So I told her about you. Is that okay?"

"Yeah." Nick gave him a slight smile, reaching his hand across to him. "You must think it's pretty serious between us if you're already tellin' your folks."

"I must." He smiled back at him, reaching for his phone off his hip as it started to vibrate. "Sara... they've found the baby." He gave out a sigh of relief, before he leant forwards to press his lips to Nick's. "I better go. Grissom's already mad at me because I was late."

"We still on for tonight?"

"Of course," Leaning closer, Greg brushed their noses together, before he sealed his lips over Nick's once more. "You don't even flinch when I do that anymore." He whispered against his lips, playfully sucking on his bottom lip, teasing him into another kiss. "I gotta go."

"Okay." Nick licked his lips, "Did I really flinch?"

"Only a little." Greg nodded, shrugging his shoulders together. "It didn't bother me. I knew that you'd need time from the beginning. I actually thought it would take you longer than five weeks to trust me like you do. I guess the live in boyfriend idea wasn't such a bad one after all, huh?"

"I guess not." He smiled back at him. "I'll see you later."

"Yeah you will." Reaching for the door behind him, Greg gave him a smile, checking on Sadie in the back before he climbed out. He waved goodbye to him as he hurried towards the elevator, relieved that Warrick really had gone on ahead or he would have seen him kissing his best friend. "Hey, Sara." He caught up to her on the lab floor. "So you found the baby?"

"No, the woman, Frankie turned herself in." Sara sighed, sounding slightly disappointed. "She got scared when she saw the report on TV of the kidnapped baby in her possession. She said her boyfriend wasn't worth going to jail. He just told her to pick up the baby and meet her at her mother's in an hour. He never said anything about involving the police though."

"So he tried to set her up?" Greg followed her through to the empty break room, leaning against the counter while she grabbed herself a coffee. "Do we charge anyone with anything in a case like this?"

"How about wasting our time? He knew where his daughter was all along, but he went along with the whole investigation without telling anyone that it was just a dumb plan to get more custody. I guess his visitation rights are completely gone too. He might be charged with the attempt to kidnap. I doubt he's going to be able to see his daughter for a long time either. It's the mother I feel most sorry for. She really thought her baby had been abducted."

"Is she with her now?"

"Yeah, Brass reunited them in the station. Grissom's still down there. You want one?" She held up an extra mug, knowing the answer already as he loved his coffee. "Warrick was pretty pissed when he arrived. I hadn't even told him the baby had been found yet. Did something happen on your scene?"

"No." Greg felt the blood draining from his face, realising the last place they were was in the parking lt. He was sure he had already gone when he first kissed his boyfriend, but maybe he had seen the whole thing. "I'll be right back." He quickly slipped away, making a quick search of the lab for the man. He stopped by the locker room hearing the loud slam of a metal door, feeling a chill running down his spine as it was him. "Warrick."

"Don't even come near me." He gave him a stern warning without looking round at him.

Keeping his back to the locker room door, Greg inhaled a deep breath, trying to think of a way to explain it to him. "If you saw... what I think you saw, then I think I need to explain something to you. It's not what you think. I know you're angry or upset..."

"Why would I be angry that you've both lied to me?" Warrick sarcastically remarked, keeping his head turned away from the younger man. "You even lied to me about Nick leaving. He hasn't gone anywhere. Was it all just a big lie?" He finally turned towards him. "I asked you today if you had heard from him and you lied again. You're off having this secret life with him."

"It wasn't like that. We just... he didn't want to go back to Texas with his tail between his legs, so I said that he should stay. He didn't have anywhere to stay, so I suggested my apartment for a while. I didn't plan anything. Neither of us did."

"But he's not..." Warrick shook off the thought of his best friend being into men. "Can you just get out of my way?" He motioned towards the door.

The last thing he wanted to do was have a conversation about what he had just seen. He didn't look the younger man in the eyes as he stepped away from the door, storming away before he could say another word to him. He refused to believe it even though he had seen it right in front of him, but he didn't believe that someone could keep up a lie like that for the past six years or so that he had known him.

With Warrick gone, Greg dropped heavily to the bench in the middle of the locker room, anxiously running his finger through his hair. If Nick found out that Warrick had seen them, he could quite possibly go into a full blown panic attack.

He nervously made his way back to the apartment as soon as his shift was over, inhaling a deep breath before he unlocked the front door. His nostrils were immediately invaded by a delicious scent, but he couldn't put his finger on what it was. There was no sign of Nick in the kitchen, so he removed his jacket and sneakers, taking a few steps into the kitchen to see what was cooking.

"Be ready in about fifteen minutes." Nick startled him, giving him a smile as he turned to look at him. "I hope you're hungry."

"Starving."

"Good. There's been a slight change of plans about tonight though." He reached for Greg's hand, leading him around the counter to point out the little girl in the bouncer on the floor. She had a pacifier in her mouth, barely able to keep her eyes open. "Catherine has a cold. I didn't want to leave her there in case..."

"It's okay. I don't mind her being here." He smiled round at him. "I'm gonna grab a quick shower."

"Hey," Nick grabbed his wrist, pulling him back towards him. "Is everythin' okay? You seem oddly quiet, for you anyway." He placed his hand on his hip, looking into his eyes. "Did somethin' happen? Did I do somethin'?" With his free hand, he gently brushed his fingertips across the younger man's forehead, wondering what was going on in his head. "You know you're supposed to talk to me if this relationship is gonna work."

As much as he wanted to tell him, he knew he couldn't as the consequences could impact everything going on in his life at the moment. "I'm fine, just tired." He leant forwards, sealing a quick kiss to his lips. "I'll hurry." Greg smiled at him, making his way into the bathroom. He stepped over the change mat left on the floor, pulling his t-shirt off as he stepped up to the sink. He fished out the rubber duck and rattle from the sink, before he could brush his teeth. He stumbled on a soft jelly teething ring as he turned towards the shower, where his nostrils were immediately invaded with the scent of baby shampoo. She didn't have a lot of hair, but Nick left the top of the bottle, filling the whole shower with the soothing scent.

After a few minutes in the bathroom, he made his way into the bedroom with a towel around his waist, grabbing himself some clothes to wear. Nick was preoccupied in the kitchen, so he didn't have to worry about him seeing his scars or his naked body. He felt nervous about the clothes he had picked out, but he didn't have time to change them as the older man was already serving their food. He quickly ran his fingers through his wet hair, wishing he had time to gel or dry it, but it would have to do for now.

"Mmm, smells good." He slid into his seat, hearing Sadie making her usual whimpering sound, right before she started to cry. "I'll get her." He practically leapt out of his seat, kneeling down in front of the bouncer. He scooped her out of the elastic support, lifting her against his chest. "Did you feed her already?"

"Yeah, she's probably tired." Nick set the plates from his hands on the table, smiling as he looked up at the beautiful young man holding his daughter. He hadn't had much hands on experience since they arrived, but he looked like a natural holding her against his chest. "Here, I'll put her down. She should fall right to sleep about now." He gently scooped her out of the younger man's arms, taking her over to her crib by the bed. She whimpered about being put down at first, but soon settled with her blanket and the familiar scent of sleep.

Nick quickly made his way back to the table, serving up the mouth watering pot roast he had made, before Greg helped himself. He smiled as he saw the look on the younger man's face, adoring him even more. He took his seat opposite him, pouring him a glass of the bottle of wine that was on the table. He would have preferred a beer himself, but tonight was all about Greg and keeping a level head.

"Dig in."

"You don't say grace?" Greg gave him a curious look. He had never said it before at the dinners or restaurants they had been to, but he thought for sure he was the kind of guy to say it at home.

"Not since I was about... eleven or somethin'." He shrugged his shoulders. "My father didn't wonna hear it anymore. It was more my Mama's thing growin' up. I can't remember what happened then, but somethin' tipped him over the edge. He didn't wonna go to church with us anymore. And he stopped makin' us say our prayers before bed. Do you want to?"

"I wouldn't know how to." He smiled back at him, lifting his glass of wine off the table. "My Mom taught me basic table manners, but she never believed in saying grace. I think my Dad's folks used to make him go to church with them when he was little, but they let him make up his own mind once he was older. My Nana taught me to only eat when the host starts and to always toast the host before you've tasted anything. So," Greg looked into the older man's eyes, holding his glass of wine a little higher. "To the gorgeous Texan host, who makes food smell good."

Nick couldn't help but smile, lifting his glass of wine from the table. "All your food could smell good if you didn't nuke it in the microwave before you ate it." He clinked their glasses together, giving him a grin as he took a sip. "Is it okay for you? I'm not really a wine drinker."

"I like it."

"Why do you look more nervous than me?" Nick set his glass down, giving him a curious look. He noticed how much paler he looked than normal and how much quieter he was, feeling as though his stomach was in knots. "Did I do somethin' wrong? Is this not what you wanted?"

"It's exactly what I wanted." Greg set the glass down, placing his hands in his lap. He was contemplating whether to tell him about Warrick knowing or not, but he decided not as he looked at the delicious meal laid out in front of him. "I've just had one of those days. I'm sorry. Let's eat, I'm starving."

"Okay." The older man reached for his cutlery, glancing up at Greg for a moment, before he cut into the slab of beef on his plate. He was starting to wish that he had carved the slices a little thinner as the dull blade of Greg's cutlery wouldn't go through it, but the taste was so similar to his mother's home roast that it felt as though he was back on the ranch again.

As far as first dates went, everything went to plan, but his date seemed as though he had other things on his mind the whole time.

Greg carried their finished plates over to the sink once they were done, feeling Nick's hands brush past his hips. He took a moment to build up his courage, before he firmly placed his hands on his hips, breathing in the delicious scent of his shower gel. "You don't have dessert?" The younger man tilted his head back against him, feeling the older man's firm chest against his back.

"I didn't know what you liked. And I've never exactly made any kind of dessert other than ice cream scoops. Sorry. If you tell me what you like, I can remember it for next time." He took a slight step closer, smiling as the younger man leant back into his embrace. He moved his left hand a little higher against his hip, slipping his fingers beneath his t-shirt to feel the soft skin beneath. "Did you like everythin'?"

"I loved it. I could definitely get used to more of your cooking." He placed his hand over Nick's, feeling goose bumps shivering their way down his spine from his touch. "Nick, you know that you don't have to do anything that you don't want to."

"What if I want to, though. Would that be alright with you?"

"Are you kidding?" Greg turned around, putting his back to the sink. He felt Nick's hand sweep itself around to his back as he spun, worrying that he would feel his scars beneath his t-shirt and put him off. He looked up into his eyes, giving him a smile. "This is exactly what I have always wanted. I never thought in a million years that it would actually happen, especially not to me. It kinda feels a little like a fairytale. I feel like I need to pinch myself to make sure it's really happening, so I don't want you to rush a moment of it, just because you think I want it to happen. I do, but I want this to go at your pace."

"My pace is usually a lot quicker than this, so I don't exactly know what I want. I feel comfortable with this." He leant a little closer, aligning his hips with Greg's. "It's been almost five weeks. We haven't exactly been datin' in the normal sense of the word, but it's still kinda the same as datin'. I want to be able to do the normal things that I would do in a relationship. I've never had these kinds of feelin's for someone and not been able to express them. It's kinda frustratin' not knowin' what to do around you to show you that I care."

"I'd say this is a good start." He smiled up at him, feeling his fingers tingling his spine. "I just don't want to... push you over the edge so to speak. You haven't had a panic attack in a while, but you still won't take my advice and see someone about them."

"I talk to you. I don't want to talk to some stranger who has to read last sessions notes to remember who I am." He spoke from his previous experience with the shrink.

"That was just a department shrink. A real one on your dime would actually care."

"I don't want to talk to someone I don't know. I trust you and I know you. I feel safe tellin' you things. You actually listen and care about me. I've never had that in a relationship... ever. I want to show you that I care about you too, without flinchin' away every time you try to get close to me."

"You don't flinch anymore though."

"I know and I feel ready to be closer to you." Nick slid his flattened palm up his partner's back, smiling as he felt his body shivering against him. "I at least want to see you naked. See if you live up to my fantasies."

"You fantasise about me?" A grin immediately spread across Greg's lips. "Well, I guess it's only fair, especially since I saw you naked the other day."

"You did not." He felt the blood draining from his face. "When?"

"You thought I was sleeping. You forgot your towel. I didn't see much, but you really shouldn't bend over at the foot of the bed to put your boxers on again." He teased him, giggling as the man playfully jabbed him in the sides. "It was bound to happen sometime. And I have to say that you certainly exceed my own fantasies."

"Oh, really." Nick leant a little closer, sealing his lips to Greg's. He pulled him in for a long passionate kiss, slowly guiding him away from the sink. He pulled back for a breath as they passed the dining table, feeling a mixture of nervousness and excitement as they made it to the bed. He brushed his hand across the younger man's cheek as he broke the kiss, looking into the soul of his eyes. "How do we..."

"Depends if you..." Greg copied him, giving him a grin before he took a step back from him. He reached for the hem of his own t-shirt, pulling it up and over his head. He ditched it on the floor beside him, popping open the button of his jeans as he looked up at Nick. "Your turn."

"Okay," Anxiously licking his lips, Nick pulled his shirt out from his jeans, fiddling with the buttons for a few minutes, before he dropped it to the floor beside him. He watched the younger man loosening the fly to his jeans, slipping his thumbs into the waistband as he slid them down over his boxers. He let them fall to the floor around his ankles, easily stepping out of them without using his hands. "How do you make the simplest things look so sexy?"

"Maybe because you think I'm sexy . . . so everything I do is sexy to you." He grinned back at him. "Your turn again."

Nick grabbed for the buckle of his belt, fumbling with it for a seconds, before he got it loose. He couldn't do the same as Greg did with his jeans, making him feel a little embarrassed trying to get them free from his ankles. "You made it look easy." He smirked, finally getting his left foot free. He hooked his thumbs into his own boxers, looking at Greg in front of him. "So... after three?"

"I think I did this with my cousin once." Greg had a sudden déjà vu. "When we were little, she wanted to see what a boy looked like naked. She counted down to three. I never showed her though. Good thing too because my Mom walked in like a second later and yelled at my cousin. I think she was two years older than me, so she got into big trouble for that."

"Nice thought." Nick smiled back at him, relieved to see a little more of the familiar Greg. "No goin' back now." He inhaled a deep breath, slipping his boxers down his thighs. He managed to step out of them once they hit the floor, practically straining his neck not to look as the younger man did the same.

"Just look." He giggled, reaching out for Nick's hands to pull him closer. "You're gonna hurt yourself if you don't." The older man finally allowed himself to look down for just a moment, getting a brief glimpse of the forbidden fruit that he been denying himself all these years. "Hasn't changed your mind has it?"

"No... you're everythin' I've ever wanted... and more." Letting his natural instincts kick in, Nick gave him a gentle push back against the bed, scrambling on top of him a second later. He bravely ground their naked hips together for the first time, sliding his hands across the younger man's thighs as he assaulted his mouth. He groaned in unison with the younger man, crushing his body between himself and his mattress.

Other than their first kiss, this felt like one of the most intense kisses he had ever experienced. The heat from it alone was almost suffocating. His partner's warm hands practically melted his skin with each touch, knowing exactly where to apply pressure, sending jolts of pleasure throughout his body.

Nick felt completely in his element once they got started, knowing exactly what to do to make the younger man's body spasm beneath him. It felt more real than any of the women he had been with, feeling as though he knew him inside and out completely as he was just the same as him.

He had finally found the right fit.

* * *

 **Thank you for reading! Please review.**

 **~ Holly**


	11. Chapter 11 - Not What I Had In Mind

**Chapter Eleven - Not What I Had In Mind**

Lifting his arm from over his eyes, Nick squinted in the direction of the sun pouring in through the window, giving out a sigh as it was really morning. He heard the familiar morning cry of his little girl, surprised that she hadn't woken him sooner as he saw the six on the clock. "I'm comin'." He struggled to sit up, realising he was pinned by his boyfriend's arm. He rolled his head to the side to look at him, smiling to himself as he was still just as beautiful as last night. He couldn't get up the courage to go all the way with him after their first date, but it still felt like the fairytale relationship he had always dreamed of.

"You're staring." Greg breathed softly, keeping his eyes tightly sealed. "Baby's crying."

"I know. I got distracted by you." He leant forwards to press a kiss to his forehead, before he pried his arm off his chest to get up. He slipped on a fresh pair of boxers and a t-shirt, before he scooped out his little girl from her crib. "Good Mornin'." He pressed a kiss to her sleepy little cheek, holding her against his chest while he grabbed a fresh diaper from the bag beside her crib. "Did you sleep well?" He lay her down on his side of the bed, smiling as she immediately tilted her head back to look at Greg. "You must have done if you're wakin' up an hour later than usual."

"You hoping she'll talk back?" Greg opened one eye, watching him changing her diaper.

"She will. Someday. The books say the more you talk around the baby, the quicker they learn how to talk. She'll also recognise the sound of my voice. They normally get used to the sound of your voice from inside the womb, but I wasn't exactly there, so I've been talkin' to her since so she knows me. The books also say if you talk to them enough, they'll gurgle or coo in response." He slid a fresh diaper beneath her, looking down into her little eyes.

"It'd be cute if she ends up with a Texan accent like you." He brushed the sleep from his eyes, propping himself up on his elbow to watch Nick.

"I guess if she doesn't respond or look at me when I'm talkin', I'll know if the meningitis affected her hearin'."

"She does look at you though." He had seen them together enough, feeling a little envious of the close bond the two of them had during feeding or bath times. He reached for her little hand as she continued to look up at him, smiling as she gave out a soft gurgling sound.

"She likes you. I'm the one who feeds her, changes her diapers, baths her... and she likes you."

"Maybe she just has good taste, like her Daddy." Greg smiled at the man, trying to pull back his hand from the baby, but she had enveloped her fingers around his. "I could help you out more, if you wanted. I know you let me hold bottles for her or fetch a towel or something every now and then, but I can help a little more if you needed it."

"I didn't want to burden you with raisin' a baby too."

"If we're in this for real. Our relationship I mean, then it's not really a burden. It's just a part of being together. Kinda like a family." Greg tried to explain to him, hoping he didn't sound too full on after their first real night together. He could see himself with the older man for a long time, but the feelings might not be mutual if the man wanted to play the field a bit to see what he had been missing out on all these years. "I know she's part of the package deal and I'm okay with that because she's a part of you."

"Okay." Nick gave him a smile, buttoning his daughter back into her onesie. He patted her stomach as she continued to gaze up at Greg, smiling to himself at her sudden fascinated with the man he adored. "You know she's gonna be five months old next week."

"Is five months a big one?"

"It's about the time that they start sittin' up for themselves. And I never thought she'd make it out of the hospital, so I think it's a big one." He slid his hands beneath her, lifting her against his chest. She could hold her head up by herself now, but she always toppled over whenever he tried to sit her up right. He propped her up with a pillows to try and keep her sitting up, but she somehow managed to slip into a laying down position every time he tried. "You want some breakfast?"

"You cook breakfast too?" Greg struggled to sit up, catching the covers before they slid down his waist. "You are probably the best boyfriend ever." He wanted to lean forwards to catch a kiss from him, but he could smell his own breath and he didn't want to put him off. Morning breath was definitely a mood killer, but so was the scheduled call from his mother. "Yes, please." He smiled at Nick, before he grabbed for his phone off the night stand. "Good Morning, Mom."

Nick turned for the kitchen, leaving Greg to it while he prepared a bottle for his daughter. She curiously watched his every movement from his shoulder, only starting to whimper when the process took too long for her hungry tummy. "It's comin', it's comin'. You just have to wait a little bit longer."

She didn't want to wait though, so her whimpers soon turned to tears of frustration. He gently patted her back to try and settle her, turning to look round at Greg as he heard a tone in his voice that he hadn't heard before.

With his daughter securely against his chest, Nick slowly made his way back to the bedroom, trying to settle Sadie as they approached the younger man. He looked as though he had seen a ghost, not speaking a word as his mother tried to explain whatever it was to him.

"Okay..." Greg sniffled, inhaling a deep breath. "I know." He licked his lips, looking up at Nick as the baby gave out a frustrated cry. "I will. I love you too. Bye." He snapped his cell shut in his hand, trying to hold onto his tears long enough to explain what was going on. "That was my Mom." He wiped his hands across his eyes, explaining, "My Papa Olaf... he died last night."

"Oh," The older man perched himself on the bed beside him, reaching his free arm out for him. He pulled him close against his chest, pressing his lips to his forehead in an attempt to comfort him.

He hadn't lost anyone close to him since he was a child, but he remembered what it was like to lose his grandmother. She looked after him when he was a baby, keeping him occupied while his parents went to work, before she started babysitting the whole lot of them after school to give their parents a few extra hours at work. He knew how close Greg was to his own grandparents, but he couldn't pretend to understand how he was feeling right now.

"I'm sorry, baby." He spoke softly, holding him tightly as he started to cry into his t-shirt. He didn't know what else to say to make it any better, so he tried to comfort him for as long as he could, before he had to tend to the growling stomach of his little girl. He returned to him as soon as she was fed, laying himself down beside him, looking into his beautifully glazed eyes. "Can I get you anythin'?"

Greg breathed in deep as though he was thinking of something, but no sound came out of his mouth. He wasn't even sure if he believed everything he was told over the phone. It was hard to picture the man as gone. He had been far away from him for the past few years, but he had never just been gone.

He remained put on the bed for another hour or so, before the call of nature grew too strong. He managed to pry himself out of bed to use the bathroom, moving himself to the sofa once he was done, watching Sadie in her bouncer.

"My Mom..." He finally spoke, perking the older man's ears up from the kitchen. "She wants me to go over there. I was supposed to go next week. He had an appointment at the hospital..." He couldn't even remember what the appointment was for, but he couldn't help but think that if it had been sooner, he might still be alive. "Can you come?" He turned his head to the side, watching Nick drying the last bottle he had just washed up. "You don't have to. I just thought..."

"I'll come." Nick nodded, setting the bottle on the side. "I can drive you. When do you wonna head out?"

"I'll call Grissom. He was gonna let me take some time off next week. I guess he won't mind me taking time off a little earlier." Greg picked at a loose thread on the cushion beside him, dropping his head back to the cushion beside him. He forgot about it all for a brief moment, but he was right back to feeling a whole mixture of emotions, none of which he could explain. "I wish I could go back to last night."

"There was probably nothin' you could have done to save him. He had all kinds of cancer..."

"I didn't mean that part." Greg stopped him there, thinking more about the happiest moment of his life with Nick. He could still feel the weight of his body on top of him, the gentle caress of his hands and the moment he looked into his eyes, seeing the depths of his soul as they came together. "This wasn't exactly the plan I had for the morning after our first time together. Now I feel bad thinking about it when he's just... gone."

"Before my Grandma died," Nick joined him on the sofa, thinking back to when he was a child. "She was sick for a long time. She had problems with her heart at first, goin' in for operations and stuff all the time. But she always told us not to think of the bad times if she passed. She didn't want to be remembered for the pain she was in. At first, it was all I could think about. Durin' the readin' of her will, we all got these letters that she had written for us while she was stuck in hospital. Mine told me not to dwell on the last few moments of her life that she was in pain. She didn't want her passin' to affect how I lived my life. My point is... it's okay to think about your life at a time like this. Your Papa Olaf loved you. He wouldn't want his passin' to affect how you lived your life."

Greg gave him a slight smile, turning his head to look at the baby as she gurgled. "I think Papa Olaf would have liked you. I wish you coulda met him."

"He'll live on through you and your folks." Nick leant forwards to press a kiss to his forehead, wrapping his arms tightly around him.

There was no doubt in his mind anymore, he was falling for Greg and he believed that he really could be with him. He didn't have time to worry about the consequences at the moment, he wasn't even worried about them while he was with him. He calmed his fears just by being around him, so he was happy to be there for him too.

"When do you wonna head out?" He spoke softly, gently running his fingers through the younger man's lusciously thick hair. From his current position, he could see the younger man's dark roots growing back in. He still didn't know what colour was his natural colour, but he loved the way his hair felt through his fingers, no matter what colour it was.

"This afternoon?" Greg tilted his head back, smiling slightly as he caught the older man breathing in the scent of his hair. He leant forwards to capture his lips between his own, pulling back a moment later to look into his eyes. "How long do you need to get some things together for Sadie?"

"Uh... we might need some diapers for the trip. I was gonna do some laundry today and I'll have to make up a few bottles of formula for the drive. How long does it normally take you to get there?"

"About four hours, depending on traffic. It's usually faster driving up there at night." He dropped his head to the man's shoulder, putting his arm around him. "We can go whenever you're ready. I don't need to be there right away." He reached for the man's hand on his side, entwining their fingers together. "Do you want me to help with anything? I can help." He insisted, lifting his head to look into the man's eyes. "I'm not useless. Besides, it'll keep me busy."

"Okay," Nick tried to think of some light duties he could do. "You wonna watch Sadie while I go do some laundry? She should go down for her nap in a few minutes. She usually sleeps about an hour or so, before she's hungry again." He smiled as the younger man didn't look terrified at the thought of taking care of a baby. "It shouldn't take me too long to get her laundry done. You got anythin'?"

"First night together and you wonna start doing my laundry already?" He smiled up at him. "I'm good. Thank you." He sat up straight to let the older man up, remaining put on the sofa while Nick sorted out what needed to be washed of his daughter's things. He usually took her down there with him, meaning he would have to pack the diaper bag and things too, but with the lightened load of just the laundry bag, his arms felt a little empty.

"C'mere, sweetie." Nick scooped out his daughter from the bouncer, lifting her against his chest. He checked her diaper on his way through to the bedroom, laying her down in her crib. He felt bad about leaving her behind for the first time, but he trusted Greg more than anyone else to keep her safe. "If she cries, just leave her for a few minutes and she'll fall right to sleep. If she cries for longer then it's probably her diaper."

"What if it's not?"

"Then you can call me on my cell." He grabbed it off the bedside table, unplugging the charger from the bottom. "I shouldn't be too long." Nick stuffed his cell into his back pocket, grabbing the laundry bag as he made his way over to Greg. He leant forwards to press a kiss to his forehead, giving him a slight smile. "Are you okay?"

"I think so." Greg sighed softly, giving him a nod. "I'll be okay. Go on, go. We'll be okay without you for a few minutes." He assured him, pulling his legs up on the sofa. There was something about the expression on the younger man's face that just made him look so venerable. He didn't want to leave him either, but he knew he'd have to eventually. He pressed another kiss to his forehead, breathing in a deep breath as he got up the courage to walk out the door.

After a few minutes alone with the baby, Greg heard her starting to fuss. He pushed himself up from the sofa, treading softly across the floor towards her crib. Sadie let out a soft sigh, before she started to cry once again. She paused to see if anyone was listening, giving out a cry of desperation that pulled at Greg's heart strings. He couldn't wait any longer to see if she settled on her own. He leant over the side of the crib, sliding his hands beneath the little bundle to scoop her out.

"Hi... what's the matter?" He adjusted her against his chest, trying to find a comfortable position to hold her. She stopped her tears to study his face, curiously studying every feature with her big brown eyes. "I guess you're kinda wondering who I am,"

Greg glanced over his shoulder, before taking a seat on the bed behind him. He lay her down against his thighs, holding her in place with his hands.

"Maybe not. You're probably just thinking about your next bottle." He smiled at her as she gave out a gurgle. "You should probably know that I'm not your Mom. Your Daddy will explain all that to you one day. But I'm in no relation to your Mom whatsoever." He adjusted her as she started to wriggle. "I love your Daddy though. It's early days, but I think he likes me too. So I guess that means that the two of us are going to be spending a lot more time together."

Sadie gave out a excited gurgle this time, kicking her legs against his stomach. He smiled back at her, sliding his hands beneath her to lift her back into her crib. He stayed close by in case she started to cry once again, but she fell right to sleep after some reassurance that she wasn't alone.

When Nick returned to the apartment with his fresh pile of laundry, he found Greg fast asleep on the edge of the bed with his feet still firmly planted on the floor. He ditched his fresh laundry on the floor, gently lifting Greg's feet off the floor. He tucked him back into bed, leaving him to sleep while he started packing up some things for the trip to California.

Greg rolled himself over as he heard movement, wiping the dry tear streaks off his cheek as he tried to see what the older man was doing. "What are you writing?" He startled him, propping himself up on his elbow as Nick climbed up from the floor, joining him on the bed beside him. "A card." He noticed it in his hands.

"Yeah, I can't just show up empty handed. I know I didn't really know him, but I'd feel bad if I just showed up without anythin'."

Greg gave out a sigh, giving the man a smile. "My Mom's gonna love you." He opened the card to read what he put inside, falling even more in love with the adorable man in front of him. "You don't have to worry about trying to please my parents. They'll practically welcome you into the family the moment you walk through the door."

"I wish I could say the same." Nick slid closer, reaching for the younger man's hand to entwine their fingers together. "My folks will reject you... and me the second they find out we're in a relationship. They've rejected Sadie already because she was born out of wedlock. My mother doesn't believe in this artificial preservation thing either. She thinks keepin' someone alive who can't do it by themselves should be with God, because that's his will."

"You mean the incubator and things?" Greg brushed his thumb across the back of Nick's hand, looking into his beautiful eyes. He didn't want to say anything to offend his mother, so he kept his mouth shut. She sounded like a Royal Bitch, but he feared for their relationship if he actually said anything bad towards her. "You'll both always have me."

"You tryin' to tell me you're warmin' up to the baby?"

"What's not to like?" He reached his other hand out for Nick, brushing his thumb across his prominent jaw line. "I want to be with you, no matter what. I know she's part of the package and it doesn't really scare me, because I care about her too."

Nick gave him a smile, leaning a little closer. He brushed his nose against Greg's, bringing their lips together for a brief kiss. "You know I had a crush on you when I first met you." He confessed, brushing his fingers across his bed mates arm. "I can still picture you that first day you walked into the lab. You had bleached spikes of hair stickin' out all over the place. You looked like you were fresh out of Highschool with your baby smooth skin. I completely adored these little clusters of moles." He reached his fingers up to his cheek, brushing his thumb across a small cluster of them. "I've never thought a guy was cute before I laid my eyes on you."

"You think I'm cute?"

"Adorable." The Texan grinned against his lips, smoothing his hand towards his hip. "A part of me wishes I could go back to that moment and tell you then how I felt, but I feel as though I really fell for you by gettin' to know the kind of person you are. I wouldn't have seen all of that if we had been together that soon."

"And you were still firmly in your closet with the door barricaded, so it wouldn't have worked out."

Nick smiled back at him, wondering how he ever managed to keep that door sealed for so long. "I know this sounds stupid, but it doesn't feel as though I was that guy. Like I've kinda been takin' a back seat in my life so far, runnin' on auto pilot or somethin'. I don't ever want to go back to how I was."

"Really? I've completely converted you in less than six weeks."

"I wouldn't say that. I just know that everythin' is okay when I'm with you." He brushed his nose against Greg's again, looking at his lips poised in front of him. "I've never felt this comfortable in a relationship before. You give me a sense of security that I've never felt with anyone. I know I can trust you. You didn't even have to tell me that, I just feel it when I'm with you."

"Papa Olaf would have definitely liked you." He closed the gap between them for the kiss, before he wrapped his arms tightly around his boyfriend to hug him close. "I trust you too, you know." He spoke softly, nestling close against his chest.

He wiped his eyes before any tears rolled down his cheek, feeling as though Nick being here had softened the blow a little. He knew he'd be a complete wreck once he got home to his parents, but for now he was safe in the arms of his boyfriend.

* * *

 **Thank you for reading and reviewing so far. I'll update when I can.**

 **Hope you have a great weekend.**

 **~ Holly**


	12. Chapter 12 - Family

**Chapter Twelve - Family**

"Look at that." Pointing out across the horizon, Nick held his little girl close as she watched the ocean crawling up the sand for the first time. He smiled at the expression she had on her face, pressing a kiss to her forehead. She titled her head back to look at him, pulling her sticky fingers out of her mouth as he smiled back at her. "I don't want em." He grinned back, turning his head as he heard the stones crunching behind him. He was hoping that it would be Greg this time, but it was just another dog walker. He didn't think it would be right if he just showed up out of the blue at the house of his new boyfriend on the day after his Papa Olaf had died, so he decided to take Sadie to the beach for the first time.

He didn't get to see the ocean until he was nearly twelve years old and he knew she wouldn't really remember it, but he'd always have the memory of the first time his daughter saw it. He only wished that it was under different circumstances as his mind kept wandering to how Greg was doing. He thought he seemed alright on the drive over to California, but Greg was sitting next to Sadie in the back of the truck the whole drive, making sure she was alright for the four hour drive, before they arrived.

"Oh... nice." He adjusted his daughter against his side, realising she had just thrown up down the front of his shirt. His bags were back in the car, but he couldn't go back in case he missed Greg, so he was stuck with the baby vomit stained shirt. He moved her to rest against his other shoulder, while he tried to scrub down the wet patch, not noticing the stones crunching behind him, until Greg's hand was on his shoulder. "Oh, hey... you frightened the life out of me."

"Sorry." Greg pulled out a packed of Kleenex from his pocket, handing the man one of the tissues. "Here, let me." He slid his hands beneath Sadie's arms, lifting her against his chest to free up the man's arms.

"How was it?" Nick wiped down his shirt.

The younger man shrugged his shoulders together, giving Sadie a smile as she curiously studied his face. "You know my Mom was kinda disappointed that I didn't show up with you. You coulda come inside with me. They wouldn't have minded."

"It didn't feel right. You needed some time alone with your family. And I didn't want to be the boyfriend that was introduced while they were grievin' the loss of a family member. I've never met the parents of a... relationship partner before. But I want them to like me and have the time to get to know me and accept me as your boyfriend." He pocketed the tissue, taking a step closer to Greg. "I feel like I'm bein' kinda selfish even suggestin' this to you. I want to be there for you, but I don't want to interfere with this personal family thing when they've never even met me."

"I get it." Greg gave him a slight smile, gently smoothing his hand up and down baby Sadie's back. "But my parents will love you no matter the circumstances. I don't want to push you into it, but you have no reason to feel as though you're interfering. And I want the two of you close. My Mom's set up a room for you at the house. I think she'd be offended if you turned her down."

Nick gave out a soft sigh, unable to resist the younger man's charm. "Okay." He pursed his lips together, taking another step towards him. "You're not pushin' me into anythin'. I wanted to be here for you. I just don't want to be in the way of anythin'."

"You won't be. It's just my parents back at the house. Nana Olaf is staying with them, but she won't mind you being there." He passed the baby from his arms back to her father, almost stumbling backwards as the older man caught him off guard with a kiss in public. "Your bravery is starting to scare me."

"Why?"

"Because you're becoming braver than me." Greg smiled back at him, getting a smile out of the man. "You wonna come back to the house with me?"

"Okay." He motioned down towards his shirt. "But I need to change first."

"Your bags are still in the car." Greg pulled out his keys from his jeans pocket, holding them out to the man. "I didn't get a scratch on your baby. I didn't move the seat and I went easy on the breaks."

"I'm not that bad." Nick pocketed his keys, smoothing his hand up and down his daughter's back as she started to get sleepy. "Are you okay?" He had been told off for asking too many times back in the car, but he thought now would be a better time as he had just been home to see his folks.

"Yeah." He shrugged his shoulders together, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his jeans. "I'm not okay, okay. But I'm dealing. I thought it would hit me harder once I got home, but I'm sorta..." He shrugged his shoulders again, giving Nick a slight smile. "I'm okay though, you don't have to worry about me. C'mon, let's go back and get you some food. I know you haven't eaten yet."

Nick reluctantly followed his boyfriend back to the car, realising he was pretty hungry, even if he didn't want to intrude on the private family matter. He changed his shirt before he climbed back into the car, feeling butterflies in his stomach as he drove his car back in the direction of Greg's parents house. He locked up his car once they were in the driveway, clutching his sleeping daughter tightly as they approached the front door.

"Relax." Greg spoke softly, slipping his hand into the older man's halfway up the drive. He gave it a gentle squeeze as they approached the door, deciding to ring the bell rather than using his keys, so they could meet the man properly for the first time. He glanced at Sadie sleeping peacefully against the man's chest, smiling to himself before he turned to look at the door. He gulped himself as the door opened up, giving his father a slight smile. "Hi Dad, this is Nick."

"Hi, Nick." The man leant through the doorway, offering the man his hand. He smiled slightly as he caught Nick tearing his hand away from his son's in order to accept it. "I'm Daniel, Greg's father. Jean's inside somewhere, you're welcome to come inside though." He opened the door a little wider, ushering the two of them inside. "Greg told us about your daughter. How old is she now?"

"Thank you. She's twenty one weeks... nearly five months." Nick stepped into the entrance of the house, looking at the huge stairs leading up to the second floor. He glanced up at the glass chandelier hanging in the middle of the room, before he turned his head to look at the paintings. He didn't recognise the painter, but he remembered Greg saying that his mother did a bit of painting now and then.

"Really, she's tiny for five months. I guess that comes with being premature. Greg came a day before his due date. I think his birth weight was around about eight pounds." Daniel led them through to the next room, surprising Nick even more as it opened up to a large kitchen. The wall at the other end was completely covered with windows, giving them a full view of the garden outside.

"Sadie was one pound when she was born. Last check up she was ten pounds, eight ounces." Nick brushed his hand across the smooth marble counter top, admiring the family sized breakfast bar on the other end. He always imagined having a family home of his own one day, but a place like this seemed too big for just the one child. "You have an amazin' home, Mr Sanders."

"Thank you." He smiled round at his son. "I'll be back in a minute." Daniel left them in the kitchen, spotting his wife out in the garden. She had been sorting things in the house all morning to try and take her mind off the recent death of her father. Now she had turned her attention to the garden while the sun was still up in the sky.

"This place is amazin'." Nick glanced back at his boyfriend, circling the island to look at the leather seated stools at the counter.

"My Dad designed it." The younger man sat himself on one of the stools. "My Mom did a lot of the decor design inside, but my Dad designed the building. He had it built when I was fourteen. We lived in San Francisco before we moved here. Our place there was a lot smaller than this. It was all one floor, just the two bedrooms and one bathroom. Drove my Mom crazy, so Dad gave her a top floor with three bathrooms, four bedrooms and the summer house where she could paint to her heart's content." He pointed towards it at the foot of the garden.

It needed a lick of paint, but it looked like a nice escape.

"Hi Nick, I'm sorry I was touching up the borders in my garden." The woman removed the gardening gloves from her hands, extending her hand towards the man to greet him. He could definitely see the family resemblance now that he had seen both Greg's parents. He got his features from his mother, but he was exactly the same height and build as his father. He noticed that his mother didn't have a blemish or a mole in sight though, while his father had the similar clusters of little moles dotted around his face.

"It's nice to meet you. You have a lovely home, Mrs Sanders." He remembered the manners his mother had drilled into his head. He never thought he'd be using them to meet the boyfriend's parents, but he felt oddly comfortable being in their home, knowing that they were accepting of their situation.

"Thank you. I have to say that you're not exactly what I pictured when Greg said he's got a new boyfriend. I mean no offence." She quickly assured him. "They're usually covered in tattoos or full of holes."

"She means the piercing kind of holes." Greg filled him in, pulling his mother away from his new boyfriend to hug her. "Only the one had a piercing anyway."

"Right through his lip." Jean pinched her own lip as she looked at Nick beside her. "It looked horrible. I can't stand things like that. I haven't even got my ears pierced. Where are my manners, can I get you anything?" She motioned towards the kitchen, grabbing a glass for herself. "Water, coffee... there's a pitcher of ice tea still in the fridge."

"No thank you, ma'am. I'm alright for now. I'll need some hot water for her formula in a few minutes if that's alright." He motioned towards the baby in his arms.

"Of course, help yourself to anything you need. When I heard you were coming, I set up one of the guest bedrooms for you with Greg's old crib. It barely got used when he was a baby. He was a little wriggler as a baby. He used to roll all night long. He'd wake up every few minutes banging his head on the bars of the crib, so we used one of those softer travel cot's for the night."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome." She gave him a smile, filling her glass with water. "Help yourself to any towels, food or anything you need. Let me know if there's anything else you'll need. I'm sorry I've got to meet and run like this, but we've got some funeral prep to do. I'll have to meet your adorable little girl when she's awake." The woman gently patted the sleeping baby on the back, before she turned to look at her son behind her. "Your Nana insisted on picking out a suit by herself, so she should be back any minute. Can you let her in when she gets here and make sure she hangs the suit up?"

"Okay." Greg nodded, following them towards the door.

"Give Nick the tour." His father stepped around him, grabbing his and his wife's jacket from by the door. "You alright?" He gave his son a curious look. Greg gave him a slight nod, stepping aside so his mother could change her shoes. "We won't be long. We have to go to the office of the funeral director."

"Already?" He had never been to a funeral before, but he thought it was still a little soon to be arranging that sort of thing.

"Papa Olaf made the plans himself." Jean held onto her son's shoulder for support as she slipped her left foot into her other shoe. "Your Nana didn't want to come along. She thought it would be too upsetting for her. We just have to go over the plans that he made. It shouldn't take too long." She assured him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders as he had the little lost boy look in his eyes. She gently smoothed her hand up and down his back, gritting her teeth together as she held back her tears. "Make sure Nick gets settled in, okay?"

"I will." Greg brushed his hands across his eyes to keep away the tears threatening to spill, getting the front door for his parents. Seeing how upset he was, Daniel threw his arms around his son like he used to when he was a child, hugging him tightly in his arms for a moment. "I'm okay." He assured his father, but the man held on just a little longer to make sure.

"Oh Nick, you're not allergic to cats are you?" His mother stopped at the doorway. "We have three. They don't go upstairs very often, but you might want to close your bedroom door at night with the baby. They're very friendly though."

"Thank you." He waved them off, putting his arm around Greg once they were gone. He still didn't let out the tears he was holding in, but he was starting to appreciate the fact that his boyfriend was a hugger.

He had never experienced that in a man before, making him adore the Texan even more.

"And this..." Greg opened the last bedroom door in the hallway. "Used to be my room." He clicked on the light, smiling as the older man hesitantly made his way inside. "I guess this concludes our tour." He went to pull the door closed.

"Wait, I wonna see." Nick quickly slipped inside, adjusting his daughter in his arms as he looked around the room. "Your parents kept everythin'? My room was converted into a nursery for the grandchildren as soon as I left for college." He picked up a little plastic action figure off the shelf, giving Greg a smile. "Honestly, I thought it would be a little messier."

"That's because my Mom still tidies it." He brushed his hand across the shelf as proof that there wasn't a speck of dust in sight. He dropped to the edge of his single bed, smiling to himself as the younger version of himself would have been really nervous about having a guy in his room. He didn't have any experience with a guy until he was twenty two in college, making Nick the first guy to see inside his bedroom.

"It's nice." Nick turned to look at the other side. "My Mama woulda killed me if I stuck posters to the walls though." He motioned towards the Marilyn Manson against the wall, cocking his head to the side as he tried to figure out what the other one was. "We weren't allowed to add our decoration or anythin' to our bedrooms. My sister got grounded for a nearly two weeks after she cut out loads of pictures of boy bands and stuck em to her wall. My Mama used to organise things on my desk to her likin' too. It used to drive me crazy. Even our clothes had to be in an exact place in the wardrobe or somethin'. Socks had to be folded a certain way in the drawer and all lined up. She'd go mental if anythin' was out of place."

"And I thought my Mom was bad." Greg smiled back at him, shifting aside to let Nick sit down beside him. "She used to yell at me to clean up every so often, but I think she gave up doing it herself when I was ten or eleven back in San Francisco. When I was a kid she used to have these regular toy clean ups every couple of months. She'd get out this box for charity and make me go through every single toy to see if I still used it and wanted to play with it. I used to cry every time I saw that charity box. I think I gave up maybe one or two toys a year."

"My Mama did that, except she did it while we at were school. When we got home she'd have the box of things she didn't think we needed anymore and we'd have to give a valid reason why we needed to keep somethin' in there or she'd chuck it. And if we did take somethin' out, we'd have to trade it with somethin' from our rooms." He pulled himself back across the single bed, putting his back to the wall. He tried to picture a young Greg in this room, putting a smile on his face. "Is that a model jet?" He pointed towards it on top of the wardrobe.

"Yeah, my Dad and I used to build them. I think all the others are probably in a box in the attic." Greg copied the older man's actions, putting his back to the wall, shoulder to shoulder with him. "He brought one back every trip. He travelled a lot for work, so when he got back we always had that time alone together to build something."

"I used to build them too." He confessed. "My Uncle on my father's side used to buy me one every birthday. I built them solo though." He looked around at the posters again, trying to find something that proved Greg was a gay teen, but there wasn't anything that made his room that different to his own. "Did you have a hidin' spot for your magazines from your mother?"

"I did, but she found them. I think I was sixteen when she discovered my porn stash of muscular men. She wasn't exactly freaked out, but she decided to freak me out with the whole sex talk thing. My Dad had already given me one when I turned sixteen, but she thought that she needed to add a little more after she discovered that I'd be with guys and not girls."

"You're so lucky." Nick gave out a soft sigh, noticing the glow in the dark stars stuck to the ceiling. "Your parents seem like really nice people. I'm kinda jealous." He admitted, giving the younger man a smile. He reached for his hand at his side, slipping his fingers through Greg's to hold his hand tightly in his own. "Did you ever bring any guys back here?"

"To my room..." Greg smirked, shaking his head at the man. "I know you think I've been around the block because I'm more experienced than you, but I didn't date anyone until I was twenty two. I never brought anyone back to my room. You're the first." He smiled, feeling Nick holding his hand a little tighter. "Sadie is the first girl I've ever had in my room too. And baby."

"You're lucky there. I used to get a crib stuffed in my room every couple of weeks when I was in Highschool with a new niece or nephew every time. The baby's used to wake the older kids that were stayin' with us, so they always got put in my room."

"And that didn't turn you off of having one of your own?" He reached his hand out for the baby in his arms, holding her little hand between his fingers as she started to wake up. He smiled as Nick gently smoothed his hand up and down her back, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

"I honestly didn't think I would be able to love her when she was first born. I had only just found out that Grace was pregnant then she's bein' born and I have no idea what I'm supposed to do or be for her. Now... she just feels like a part of me that I have to protect. I watched her fight in hospital to be here. And I love her more than I ever thought I could love another person."

Glancing round as he heard the door, Greg gave out a sigh, before he pushed himself to his feet. "You wonna meet my Nana before I show you round the kitchen to make her formula?"

Although he still wasn't too sure about intruding during such a delicate time, he was quite curious to meet the woman he had heard so much about. He hoisted Sadie a little higher as he climbed to his feet, following Greg back down the stairs they had come up. He thought the upstairs of the house was a lot smaller than his house back at the ranch, but they had a lot more space downstairs then he ever had back at the ranch.

"Hi, Nana." Greg let her inside, hugging her as soon as she got through the door, before he helped her with the bags and the suit she had with her. "Mom and Dad should be back in a few minutes."

"I know, your mother texted me. She told me you have a hunk and baby back here." She had no idea what her daughter was on about. She assumed it was a texting typo, but then she spotted the man on the stairs with the adorable baby girl against his chest. "Oh... introduce us then," She gently elbowed her grandson beside her, hoping her makeup didn't look too scary.

It was the first time she had been back to the house she shared with her husband in a few weeks. It felt wrong being back there without him, even though she knew that his time was coming to end for some time.

"Nana this is my friend, Nicholas Stokes... Nick and his daughter, Sadie." He ushered his nervous boyfriend down the stairs, taking his hand to bring him closer to his Nana. "Nick this is the infamous Nana Olaf I've been telling you about."

"Hi ma'am, it's nice to finally meet you. Greg's told me a lot about you."

"All good things I hope." His Nana managed a smile as she shook the man's hand. "Is that a southern accent I detect?"

"Texas." Greg nodded, receiving a grin from his Nana. He had once told her that he had always fancied a man with an accent. It was just pure luck that this luscious accent came with the Nick Stokes package. "I better hang this suit up before Mom gets back. Do you want anything from the kitchen, Nana?"

"No thank you, sweetheart. I'm just going to go lie down for a while. Lovely to meet you, Nick." She smiled at the man, slowly making her way up the stairs with her bad knee. He quickly followed Greg through to the kitchen, starting to rethink the plan of him actually being here.

"Greg, maybe I should just crash in a hotel or somethin'."

"You don't need to do that." Greg brushed down the sleeves of the suit once it was on a coat hanging, hooking it on the back of the closet door. He breathed in the familiar scent of his Papa Olaf, before he closed the door. "You're not imposing. My parents are fine with you here. Nana always takes afternoon naps."

"It just feels weird bein' here." Nick followed him around the kitchen counter, leaning against the sink as Greg started the prep for Sadie's bottle. "I'm practically around grievin' people all the time at work, but these people aren't part of a case. I can't solve anythin' to make it hurt a little less."

Greg couldn't help but smile, adoring the man who continued to try and ease the pain of the people around him. "You don't have to solve anything. Papa Olaf has had cancer for three years. We've been through the process of worrying we were going to lose him so many times that's its kinda softened the blow a little. I still can't believe the last time I ever saw him was last weekend, but I have years of memories with him." He stuck the kettle on, putting his back to the counter beside Nick. "I'm not saying I don't miss him, because I do, but he's been sorta stripped away from us during all of this. He used to be so full of life, but... he's been... slipping away from us." He pursed his lips together to keep his tears back, smiling as Nick immediately put his arms around him to hold him tightly. "You're not imposing being here. Besides, I want you here. That's a good enough reason for me to keep you around." He assured him. "Are you okay?"

"I think Sadie's diaper has just exploded." Nick broke the moment, pulling back from Greg to make sure it hadn't leaked. "Sorry, duty calls."

"Duty." Greg snickered, patting the baby on the back. "I'll go get it. It's still locked up in your car. You can put her down in the conservatory. There's a soft carpet or a sofa. There might be a cat in there too."

"I don't mind cats. I've had cats for years. I'm just more of a dog person. Not to say I don't like em though. I just prefer dogs." He informed him, carrying his daughter through to the conservatory. He looked around at the cream white sofas and the wicker coffee table, before he glanced down at the white sheep skin rug that had one of the three cats laying on. She lifted her head as he entered the room, stretching out her paws in front of her, before she fell back to sleep.

"Here you are." Greg returned with the diaper bag, laying the change mat on the floor for him. "That's Trixie." He pointed to the cat on the floor. "She's fourteen or something now. She wouldn't hurt a fly. She used to sleep on my bed with me when I lived here. If you see a sorta white one with brown legs, make sure you're wearing shoes. He likes to sit on peoples feet, and he's really heavy. You won't really see the other one. He comes in for his dinner in the morning then disappears for the whole day. Mom rescued him from a shelter about four years ago. She couldn't have any more kids, so she started rescuing animals instead. We had a three legged dog once, but he left too much fur around. After he died, she didn't want another dog. She stuck to short haired cats instead."

"So you're a cat person?" Nick queried, kneeling down on the floor. He lay his daughter down on the change mat, peaking the tabby cats curiosity. She remained in her position on the floor, inquisitively studying the tiny human being in front of her.

"Not really. I like animals... I just prefer the company of people." He smiled as the older man glanced up at him. "Do you want me to make up a bottle for you?"

"Do you know how?" He buttoned Sadie's onesie, lifting her legs with one hand to sweep her dirty diaper out from under her.

"I can read instructions."

"Knock yourself out." He trusted him, leaving him to it while he slipped a fresh diaper in place around his daughter's hips. "That's a cat." He spoke softly to his daughter, catching her watching Trixie licking her paws. "I can't wait for you to start talkin', kiddo." He scooped her up with his hands, pressing a kiss to her head as he held her close. He carried her back to the kitchen, taking a seat to watch Greg at work. He had seen him do it so many times back at the apartment that he prepared her bottle as if he had been doing it for years.

Now more than ever he realised he already had the family he had longed for. He didn't think it would all happen so quickly, but he wouldn't trade them in for anything in the world.

* * *

 **Thank you for reading. Please review.**

 **~ Holly**


	13. Chapter 13 - Outsider Looking In

**Chapter Thirteen - Outsider Looking In**

Standing on the side lines of the cemetery, Nick anxiously shifted from one foot to the other, feeling even more like an outsider. He was wearing a borrowed suit from Greg's father that didn't exactly fit, holding his fussy baby girl in his arms. Mr Sanders was quite a lot taller than him and not as broad in the shoulder area, making it quite a tight fit. His daughter wouldn't take her bottle before they left and now instead of her usual nap in her car seat, she was out in the hot sun, making her more than a little upset. He tried to steer clear of the grieving family while he settled her, but the hearse was just rounding the corner. He spotted the car with the immediate family behind it, feeling his guilt coming back for not wanting to join Greg in the car. With his parents, Nana Olaf and the driver, there wouldn't have been room for him and the baby anyway, but Greg still wanted him close by.

As the car pulled up, Nick adjusted his daughter against his side, trying to hold her away from his ear so she wouldn't make him go deaf with her cries. He tried rocking her from side to side as he watched Greg's parents climbing out of the car. His mother was wearing a long black dress that did nothing for her curvy figure and an unusual looking feather hat. He saw Nana Olaf climbing out of the car next, wearing a wide rimmed black hat with a fish net veil hanging over her face. Her dress wasn't quite as long as her daughter's, but her heels weren't quite as high as Jean's either.

Finally, he caught sight of Greg climbing out of the car. He couldn't help but smile at the sight of the vintage Vegas styled suit he had on, complete with the waistcoat and hat. He could immediately picture himself marrying the younger man with that suit on, bringing back the butterflies in his stomach feeling.

"Shh, shh, shh," Nick turned his attention back to rocking his daughter in his arms. "You gonna cry through the whole thing? Papa Greg needs you to be strong for him today." He lifted her higher, patting his hand against her back as she wriggled and squirmed against him. "You don't wonna be there for Papa Greg."

Sadie gave out a grunt against his shoulder, rolling her head to the other side. He managed to stuff a pacifier in her mouth after she was settled, waiting a moment to make sure she wasn't going to have another outburst, before he joined the family. He slid his free hand into Greg's in the front row, giving it a gentle squeeze to let him know he was there.

His daughter fell asleep against him halfway through the service, giving him time to divert all his attention to Greg. He wasn't crying like his mother yet, but he looked as though he was on the verge of bursting into tears at any moment.

As Papa Olaf's coffin started going down into the ground, Nick squeezed the younger man's hand a little tighter, biting his bottom lip to keep back his own tears. He never even met the man, but the tears started to flow down his cheeks. He closed his eyes to keep them at bay, feeling Greg pulling away from him a moment later. He opened his eyes to watch the younger man and his family dropping flowers into the open grave, before Greg retook his hand, leading him away.

The younger man remained silent for what felt like hours, just staring up at the sun flickering through the trees as they walked. He strolled towards some trees near the road, giving them some shade from the sun. He was glad that Nick wasn't asking him if he was okay, but he was starting to worry about the older man himself now. "Is this too weird for you?"

"No, it's not weird. I'm here for you." He gave him a slight smile, wiping his hand beneath his eyes to swipe away the tear streaks from his cheeks. He couldn't cry in front of him, not when he needed him. He wasn't sure what to say to him at a time like this, so he decided to just hold him close instead. "What's next? I've never exactly done a funeral before, so..."

"The wake." The younger man placed his hand on the sleeping baby's back, hugging the both of them tightly. "It's back at the house for close family. Mom hired a few caterers to do food and drinks. It shouldn't last too long. We don't have to go if you don't want to."

"I'll go for you. We both will." He held him close, listening to the younger man's soft breathing for the next few minutes. "You wonna hold her?" He whispered softly.

"Won't it wake her up?"

"She's a heavy sleeper once she's out." Nick turned her around in his arms, carefully handing her over to the younger man. She remained fast asleep during the transfer, resting her head against Greg's shoulder as he held her close. "You know she likes you. She still cries and kicks up a fuss whenever I hand her over to her doc, but she's comfortable with you."

"Maybe that's because she hates visiting the doctor. I know I did. Still do." Greg gently smoothed his hand up and down her back, looking at Nick in front of him. "She's not as bad as I thought she would be. I thought living with a baby would get in the way of other stuff or that she would be really loud, but she's not as bad as I thought."

"What kind of stuff?" He tilted his head to the side, giving him a curious look. "Would she get in the way of I mean?"

"Us." The younger man spoke softly, brushing his fingertip across the baby's little hand. "I didn't really think about the whole baby thing when I asked you to move in with me. I was just thinking about you. You were pouring your heart out to me and I just wanted to be closer to you. I thought she might get in the way or come between us, but she's more like an extension of you now. And I..." He watched her peacefully sleeping a moment, before he glanced up at Nick in front of him. "I love her too."

"When you say, you love her too." Nick took a step closer, close enough to place his hand on Greg's. "Does that mean that you love me?" He felt as though he shouldn't have said anything the second the words slipped out of his mouth, but he needed to know if this was really going anywhere, especially with a baby in the mix.

Greg burst into an explosive grin after a few seconds, feeling butterflies in his stomach as he confessed, "I do. I think I have for a while now. I never knew what it was like to actually love anyone outside of family before. You're the first."

"Lucky me." The Texan grinned back at him. "You know, I think I might be fallin' for you too."

It wasn't exactly what he wanted to hear right now, but it was close enough to make the younger man's heart flutter.

The day drifted onto the wake back at the house, forcing them apart once again. Greg joined his parents to meet, greet and thank long time family friends for coming, while Nick settled his daughter in the bedroom upstairs. It was easy enough to fix a bottle with just the caterers in the kitchen, but it was harder to get her to sleep for her afternoon nap with the chatter downstairs and the constant thud of shoes across the hardwood floors. He thought the house would be a little more sound proof than this, but he could practically hear every conversation going on all at once.

He changed himself out of his borrowed suit to get more comfortable, laying on his side across the middle of the bed with Sadie laying down beside him. She rattled the plastic keys she was holding in her hands, bringing one up to her mouth to chew with her toothless gums, before she shook them again. She tilted her head back against the mattress beneath her as they heard footsteps, watching the door opening after a light knock.

"Hi, sweetheart. Only me. I fixed you a plate. I thought you might be hungry." Jean carried in a tray with a plate of food on it, setting it on the clear bedside table for him. "There's more downstairs if you want it. Help yourself to anything."

"Thank you, Mrs Sanders." He struggled to sit up. "Thank you for havin' us here today."

"I told you to call me Jean." She smiled at the polite young man, definitely preferring him over the other boyfriend's her son had brought home with him over the years. "How are you doing?"

"We're okay." He gave her a reassuring smile, noticing the woman looking at the baby more than him. "Is it okay for us to be here still?"

"Oh sure, we love having you here. You're welcome to stay as long as you like." The woman nodded, perching herself on the end of the bed. "Sadie's a very lucky little girl to have a father like you. I hope you don't mind me asking," She glanced away from the baby a moment, looking up at Nick. "But are you planning on raising her with my son in his one bedroom apartment?"

"I eh..." Nick felt as though he had a spotlight on him. "I haven't really planned that far ahead, if I'm bein' honest. I hadn't planned any of this really, it's all just sorta happened all at once. I always wanted my future to pan out with marriage, a nice house then kids, but it's all gone in the wrong order."

"It always does." She smiled at him. "I met Daniel, Greg's father in Highschool. He was a few years older than me when I met him. We didn't like each other when we first met. We were forced to work together at our part time job in the warehouse of this... toy shipping company or something. I wanted to do nails at that age, but my mother didn't want me too far from home and this box factory was literally down the street from us. I had never seen Daniel at school, but we were forced to work together sealing up these boxes ready to be shipped. He's a bit of a perfectionist and I was going too fast for him to keep up. He'd keep pressing stop on the machine to try and catch up and I'd yell at him every time he held up the line."

The woman smiled at the memory, before she continued,

"Somehow after all that, Daniel got up the nerve to ask me out on a date. We had a pregnancy scare when I was sixteen. My father hated him from the first moment I introduced them, so he was even more upset at the prospect of us having a child together. It turned out to be an ectopic pregnancy when I miscarried, but it brought us closer together and made us realise what we wanted in life. We had to go behind my parents backs after the pregnancy incident. We planned on getting married right after college, but I got pregnant with Greg right after my Highschool graduation. Daniel was in college by then. My parents didn't want me to have a baby out of wedlock like they did, but we held off getting married until Greg was about two, two and a half. We had all been living with my parents up until that point, so it was nice to finally get out from under their influence and raise our family together. I think my father finally started to warm up to Daniel after we moved out. Well... only a little."

"Greg said they never really got on."

"No, that was because my father liked to tease him. He didn't mean any harm by it. I think he was just hell bent on protecting me from everything that he didn't even realise that Daniel could have been a part of his family too. He adored Greg though. He always said there was more of me in Greg than Daniel. I see a lot of both of them in my son." The woman watched over the baby for a moment, before she glanced up at the young man in front of him. "You have no idea how happy I am that Greg has found someone like you. I understand that your own mother has cut all ties with you since the birth of your daughter."

"Greg told you?" He felt a little embarrassed that she knew, but she didn't appear to have a judgemental look on her face.

"Only because he's worried about you, sweetheart." She reached across the bed for his hand, gently lifting it from the covers. "I just want you to know that Daniel and I are here for you if you need us. You're dating our son and starting a life together after all. We don't want to get in the way of that, we just want to be there to help if you need it. Like buying a house for the three of you to live in, so this little one will have room to play."

"Mrs Sanders, I couldn't accept..."

"It's money we've put aside for Greg." She quickly pointed out to him. "We saved up for him to go to college. After he got the scholarship, he never really needed it, so we continued saving for his wedding or our grandchildren. My father didn't have high hopes of him getting married after we found out he was gay, but I know my Greg and he's a bit of a hopeless romantic behind the front he puts on. So rightfully, the money is for Greg and the family he's made with you."

"We've only been together six weeks." Nick felt the need to tell her, before she invested too much in him.

"Yes, but you've known each other for six years. He's never stopped talking about you on his visits home. I think after that amount of time together, you would have figured out by now if you were a bad match for each other. Tell me honestly, would you be wasting your time with him while you have baby to care for?"

Nick felt a little embarrassed again, shaking his head as he looked up at the woman. "I'm not wastin' my time with him. I'm with Greg because I really like him."

"There we are then." Jean smiled, pushing herself to her feet off the bed. "And please Nicky, call me Jean. We're practically family now. Oh and I'm always available to babysit, especially on short notice." She quickly added, getting a smile out of the man as she turned for the door. "Give me a shout if you need anything. I'll find Greg for you and send him up to keep you company. I think he'll be looking for an escape right about now anyway."

"Thank you... Jean." He called out to her, waving her off as she closed the door. He turned his attention back to Sadie beside him, wishing she could talk for just a moment so he could ask for her opinion. She was going to be growing up around the younger man after all, it would be nice to know her opinion on the subject.

He reached out for the tray as he felt his stomach rumbling, looking over the suspicious looking food on the plate. It smelt good whatever it was and he was too hungry to care at the moment. He lay himself down beside his daughter as soon as he was finished, listening to the soft sounds of her breaths. She ditched the plastic keys after a few minutes, trying to reach her toes instead. He was sure that she would be able to roll or sit up soon, but for now trying to pull her foot towards her mouth was her latest trick.

"Yeah?" The man rolled over onto his stomach, hearing a knock at the door. He watched it opening, lighting up the second he saw the adorable young man in question. "Hey, you."

"Hi." Greg closed the door behind him, kicking his shoes off. He threw his hat onto the dresser, before he knelt at the foot of the bed to kiss his boyfriend. "Are you okay?" He stroked his fingers through the man's hair, sealing another kiss to his lips.

"I'm okay... are you?" He looked into his eyes, trying to tell if he had been crying.

"Yeah." He hooked his fingers into his shirt collar, pulling his tie away from his neck. "I could really use a shower. My Mom didn't hassle you with questions when she came up to see you, did she?"

"No." Nick rolled over onto his side, watching the younger man removing his tie and suit jacket. He almost wanted him to keep them on while he made out with him, but it was neither the time or the place. He would have to hold onto those urges until a later date, when Greg wasn't mourning the loss of a loved one. "We just talked. She told me about how she met your father. And she told me about your college money they've been savin' up. She wants us to put it towards a family home for the three of us."

"My Mom has always hated my apartment." He smirked, taking a seat beside him. "What did you say?"

"I didn't know what to say." Nick propped himself up on his elbow, letting the younger man lay down beside him. "We could do it though, you know. Live together. In a big place for the three of us. Not just because your Mom said. I've been thinkin' about it for a while."

"You don't think it's a little too soon for that?" He slid into his embrace as close as he could, feeling the full warmth of his body against him. "I mean, I'm all for it. But we've only been dating for what... three months., give or take. Most people would consider that too soon to move in together."

"Do you think it's too soon?"

"A little." Greg nodded, looking up into his eyes. "Although technically, we already moved in together before we had a first date, so I guess buying a house together before we've had sex is kinda our thing." He grinned up at him, before he leant closer to seal a kiss to his lips. He dropped back to the bed after a moment, closing his eyes as the older man climbed on top of him, devouring his lips with his own. He felt crazy for denying this man, but he was still terrified that it was all a dream that would end too soon if he rushed it.

But then again, he felt himself pretty powerless under the older man's influence.


	14. Chapter 14 - Full On Assault

**Chapter Fourteen - Full on Assault**

"I thought you made up your mind already?"

"Well if I had, I wouldn't be going through this right now, would I?" Grace continued the never ending argument with her mother, while she packed away her clothes into the suitcase on her bed spread. She had changed her mind several times already, but she was sure about her decision this time. It was time to head back to the city that she used to call home and be reunited with the baby she left in the hospital. "I'm not going to do anything rash, I just want to see her. It's my right as her mother."

"You gave up that right when you left her there." The woman argued, folding her arms across her chest, giving her daughter the familiar look of disapproval. "You really think the birth father is just going to let you see her after what you did?"

"He'll have to." She opened her dresser against the wall, pushing aside her tops to retrieve the twenty week scan image she had kept from her first ultrasound. "I'm her mother. I let him keep her for this long. He doesn't have the right to keep her from me. He never bothered to take it all the way to court, so he must have known that I would be back for her."

"You don't even know her name."

"Only because you've blocked every call we've ever received from him." She turned it around on her mother, adding the ultrasound picture to her suitcase. "I'll talk to him when I get there. He never could resist me before."

The woman rolled her eyes at her naive daughter, giving up on the lost cause. She never listened to anything she said anyway, so it was pointless trying to argue with her over something that she had her mind set on. She knew she'd give it up or change her mind after a week or so on her own, she just hoped that no one got hurt in the process of Grace's quest to find out what it was like to actually be a mother to someone.

She feared for her granddaughter the most.

"Wait, wait..." Greg stopped the coroner from the rolling the body over, quickly pulling his tweezers out of his vest pocket. He grabbed for the tiny piece of paper he spotted on the floor, bringing it to eye level. "Looks like a corner of photo or something. It's been burned."

"Who burns a photo?" David let him get out of the way, before he rolled the body over. "As for the cause of death... can't say for sure, but looks like blunt force trauma to the head. There's something in the wound too."

"Looks like glass." Greg bagged the piece of paper, glancing up as Warrick came walking back into the front room of their victim's house. "Did you find anything upstairs?"

"There's a kids room." Warrick still couldn't look him in the eyes. "I checked with Brass, he shares custody of his nine year old daughter with his ex wife. He has her on weekends, so I doubt she was here. He's gonna try and get hold of her to check. She might even be our suspect."

Greg figured at least he was talking to him now. Looking at him might take a little longer after what he had found out, but until then they could still work a case together. He still hadn't told Nick that his best friend knew about them. He considered Nick's mind still too fragile to deal with someone from work knowing that they were together intimately.

"There's more glass over here." Clicking on the light of his flashlight, Greg examined the little bits of coloured glass on the floor, noticing some water on the floor. He followed the trail towards the decaying flowers, guessing their victim had been hit over the head with a vase of some kind. "There's a card." He picked it up off the floor. "Good luck with the new job." He turned it around to show Warrick that it had been signed with a kiss.

"Brass said he's a car salesman." Warrick examined the other side of the room, trying to look for any sign of a break in, but other than the dead body in the front room, the place was completely spotless.

"Maybe somebody didn't like his big promotion."

"There's a business card in his pocket." David pulled it out, handing it over to Greg. "And it looks as though he's been redressed. He's missed two buttons." He pointed them out, leaning back as Warrick snapped a picture with his camera.

Greg scanned the photos decorating the mantle, lifting out an empty frame from the back. He bagged it up to check for prints later, noticing a very intimate photo between their victim and an older man. He had a lot of theories when they first walked in, but now he was starting to suspect some kind of lover's tiff, especially with the burnt up photo in the mix. He didn't feel safe enough to share his theories with Warrick at the moment. He tended to avoid all things male, dating and relationships around him at the moment.

They spent another hour or so collecting evidence at the house, before they made their way back to the lab in separate cars. Warrick attended the autopsy alone, leaving Greg to dust the empty photo frame for prints. He managed to pull off a few partials off the edges, finding a full print on the inside, hoping it belonged to the killer.

"Mr Sanders," Judy from reception poked her head into the lab, giving him a smile as he glanced round at her. "There's a man looking for you at the front desk and Grissom wants to see you in his office as soon as you get a moment."

"Thank you." He nodded in her direction, taking the prints over to the scanner. He was hoping that they were in the system already, giving him some time to see who was at the front desk. He snapped off the latex gloves from his hands, removing his lab coat, before he made his way towards the front desk. He knew Grissom would be pissed about being second on his list, but he was worried that it could have been Nick, especially after his doctor's appointment this morning.

"Greg." The man jumped up from one of the seats, grabbing the younger man's wrist before he could say anything. He pulled him aside from the main traffic of the various lab technicians, giving him a smile as he looked into his eyes. "I've missed you. I just got back from a conference in New York. I heard about your Papa Olaf."

"How?" Greg pulled his arm away from Stuart, thinking this was all he needed to deal with today.

"Your Mom. I called her to see where you were, since you've been ducking my calls. We got talking and she told me about the funeral. Are you okay?"

"I've been ducking your calls because I told you to stop calling me." He pointed out to him. "We're not together anymore, Stuart, which means you can't just show up like this anymore."

"I thought you just needed some time to get over that, before we could get back together again." Stuart watched one of the lab technician's walking by them, before he grabbed for the younger man's arms. He was so much stronger than him, so he managed to pull him back towards the elevator, closing the doors before he could get away. "Greg, this isn't still about that stupid thing with that guy is it?"

"What guy?" He had never told him about Nick out of fear of what he would do, so he had no idea what he was talking about.

"The guy that you found with me. I told you it didn't mean anything and I meant it. It was just a dumb fluke. You shouldn't let it ruin what we have."

"Had. Past tense." Greg pointed out to him, going for the control panel before the elevator took them too far away from the lab. "And you cheated on me, it wasn't just a dumb fluke. You hurt me in a way I can never forgive. I only called you because I needed to talk to someone. The one thing you were ever good at while we were dating was listening and now you can't even do that right because you think I want a relationship with you after everything you put me through before."

"But I miss you." Stuart hit the button to keep the doors closed, blocking the younger man's escape. "I can make it up to you, I swear."

"I don't want you to make it up to me. I don't want anything to do with you anymore." He tried to push past him, but he was still much stronger than him.

"Just give me a chance."

"No." Greg shook his head. "Now let me go. Unless you want me to call security."

Stuart raised his hands, taking a step away from him. "I know you still care about me. You wouldn't have called me if you didn't. You have tons of people to talk to in your life. You picked me because you still care about me and you know I still care about you."

"You don't and I don't either." Greg slipped out of the doors the second they opened, turning back to look at Stuart. "It was a mistake calling you, I know that now. Just do me a favour and leave me alone, okay? I'm with someone now who actually cares about me. I don't need you back in my life right now... so leave me alone."

"This guy." Stuart wasn't giving up without a fight, practically chasing him down towards the labs. "The one that you're with, he'll never care about you like I do."

"You're right." Greg took a step back towards his supervisor's office. "He cares about me a whole lot more then you ever did." He turned on his heels, giving the door a light knock, before he stepped inside. "Hey, boss. You wanted to see me."

"Yes, sit down." Grissom motioned towards one of the chairs, while he finished up the report he had in front of him. He closed it up after a moment, glancing up at Greg over the rim of his glasses. "It's come to my attention that you and another CSI have become... romantically involved." He removed the specs from his nose, placing them on the desk in front of him. "Lab policy clearly states no dating. If this gets back to Ecklie or the lab director..."

"Technically, we haven't broken any rules though." Greg saw no point in denying it, sensing that Warrick was the culprit of this rumour. "We haven't been working together since we started dating. Not once, so none of our cases have been compromised by our relationship. Which is why we didn't feel the need to tell anyone."

"So it is true then?" Grissom leant forwards on his seat, searching for the truth in the younger man's expression. "You and Nick Stokes have become romantically involved?"

"We prefer to call it dating, but... yeah." Greg shrugged his shoulders together. "We didn't plan it. And nothing has ever happened at the lab." He flat out lied, remembering their first kiss in the locker room. "It started when he was about to leave for Texas, so we haven't been working at the lab together since. The thing is, we really don't want this getting out. Half the guys we work with have already expressed their opinions about gay guys. If they knew..."

"Your secret is safe with me." Grissom assured him, leaning back against his chair. "Thank you, Greg. I won't take this any further, but if and when Nick decides to come back to work. You won't be allowed to work the same shift. We'll have to switch one of you over to another shift to keep things legit."

"I'm sure he'll be fine with that once the time comes. It'll give him more time with Sadie too." Greg climbed to his feet, giving his supervisor a curious look. "Out of curiosity, how did you even find out about us? He hasn't been back to the lab since, so how did you know?"

"I can't reveal my source to you, Greg." He simply smiled back at him. "Although, I really can't picture it myself. Nick and you." He tried to picture it a moment, but they were so different it was hard to even imagine it. "I didn't even know Nick was gay. And I wouldn't picture you as his type. No offence."

Greg folded his arms across his chest, giving the man a slight smile. "None taken. So you're not going to tell anyone?"

"No policies were broken if it was on your own time and you weren't working together when it started, so there's nothing to report on. Unless it affects your work here at the lab, it's none of my business. Which is how I would like it to remain." He gave him a quick warning, not wanting their relationship to affect anyone else on the team. "I trust you to keep this discreet as you can."

"Don't worry about it. That's exactly the way we wanted to keep it." He turned on his heels, going for the door. He was relieved that Stuart wasn't waiting outside for him, but then he spotted Warrick making his way through the hallway. He couldn't just let him get away with almost destroying their careers. "I need to talk to you." He stopped in front of him, motioning towards the empty lab beside them. "Now." He blocked his exit again.

Warrick gave out a hefty sigh, reluctantly stepping into the lab. "Make it quick. I'm busy."

"I know you don't like me, but I wouldn't think that you would jeopardise your best friend's career over something like this."

"What?" Warrick perched himself on the table, giving him a confused look. "What exactly are you accusing me of, Sanders?"

"You ratted us out to Grissom." He accused him. "We both could have lost our careers. You know the lab policy on dating."

"I didn't say anything to anyone."

"You're the only one who knows and would do something like that."

"If that's what you think then why would I wait nearly six weeks, before I ratted you out? If you really think that I would do something like that to 'you' or Nick, then you really don't know me at all. That man has had my back more times than I can count. I would 'never' jeopardise his career over something so stupid. I didn't tell anyone." He assured him, pushing himself up from the table. "Are we done? Some of us have work to do."

"Yeah." Greg stuffed his hands into his pockets, feeling a little guilty. "What did you get from autopsy?" He caught him before he stormed away.

"Doc Robbins is pretty backed up, but he did say that the most likely cause of death was the trauma to the head. Did you get some prints of the vase pieces?"

"Mandy has the vase. I took the photo frame. I gave the burnt up photo to Hodges." Greg ushered the man towards Mandy's lab, giving her a smile as she started dusting another piece of the vase. He stepped up to the computer to see if he had any matches to the prints yet, but it was still running them. "No matches yet, are you having better luck?"

"I've got too many partials to make a full print at the moment." Mandy pulled off another print, holding it up to eye level. "This might go quicker if you could print the people he was close to."

"Brass is bringing in the ex wife and the daughter." Warrick stepped around the counter where Mandy was working, taking a look at all the partials she had taken off the vase. "Hey Greg, make yourself useful and print the wife and kid. Any luck finding out who sent those flowers?"

"Archie is on it. The card had the florists companies logo on it, so he's trying to track down the date and who ordered them." Greg turned on his heels, giving out a sigh as he made his way towards the supply cupboard. He grabbed himself a print kit, before he made his way down to the station. "Hey, Metcalfe." He stepped up to the front desk. "Is Brass back yet?"

"Yeah... interview room one. Hey, I'm sorry about your Papa Olaf, Greg. Sara told me that's why you were out the last couple of weeks."

"Thanks." Greg gave him a half smile, turning for the interrogation rooms. He gave the first door a light knock, before he made his way inside.

"Sanders, here for prints?" Brass ushered him over to the table. "Ms Walker, would you mind us taking yours and your daughter's fingerprints? Just to rule them out around your ex's house."

"I..." The woman looked at the kit in Greg's hands nervously. "I'd rather wait for my lawyer to get here."

Brass glanced round at the young CSI beside him, sensing they had both come to the same conclusion. He left her to wait for her lawyer, while he gave Judge Callen a call to see if they could get a court order to print the family. Greg waited in the hall for what felt like hours, before he noticed the man from the photos. He watched him walk up to the front desk, asking Deputy Metcalfe a question. The deputy immediately got on the phone, leaving the man to wait. His eyes looked slightly glazed, making him look a little lost. Greg immediately crossed him off his suspect list from just that look, deciding to push himself to his feet to talk to him.

"Hi, I'm CSI Greg Sanders." He introduced himself.

"Craig." The man turned around to look at him. "I'm... Luke Walker's partner. Someone called me at work and told me... do you know what happened to him yet?"

Greg knew he wasn't allowed to tell him without Doc Robbins full autopsy, but the lost boy look in his eyes reminded him of Nick. He had to tell him something. He took him through to Brass's empty office, explaining what looked like the cause of death, before he started asking about Luke's life. "Did you know if he had any enemies... rivals or anything? Maybe at work. He just got a promotion, right?"

Craig nodded, clasping his hands together in his lap. "Everyone that worked with him loved him. He was easy to get along with. Big hearted. He's been gunning after this promotion for a long time. It couldn't have been anyone there." He sniffled back his tears, perking up as he heard a memorable voice. He glanced around at the familiar woman in the hallway, shouting her mouth off at a little man in a suit. "What's she doing here?" He turned to look at Greg.

"We immediately call all the close family in a case like this. His ex wife and child were first on the list."

"She hated him." Craig pushed himself to his feet, suddenly becoming very vocal, "She did everything she could to make his life a living hell. She's tried to stop him from seeing his daughter dozens of times. The court ordered that they aren't to see each other anymore. Hayley's grandmother picks her up and takes her between the two of them now because she has made everything so difficult."

"Craig." He tried to stop him as he went for the door.

"I can't let her get away with this." He shoved Greg aside as the woman continued to shout her mouth off, barrelling down the hallway towards her. "You've got some nerve being here."

"Me? Unlike you, I was actually married to the man. Something you will never be able to do."

Craig suddenly lunged at her, shoving her up against the wall. The little lawyer tried to help out his client, but he was knocked away in an instant. "You did this, didn't you? Didn't you? You couldn't stand the fact that he was gay and he loved me. So you killed him! You took him away from me." The man shouted, trying to throttle the life out of her. He figured he had nothing to lose with the love of his life gone.

Greg scrambled to his feet off Brass's floor, hurrying down the hallway to help. The angry man easily shoved away the various deputies who tried to pull him away, only letting go of her the moment he saw Hayley's little face staring up at him. Her lower lip was trembling as she watched the man she thought of as her father trying to choke the life out of her mother.

"Cuff him." Brass ordered, putting his hand up to stop Greg from getting any closer.

"She killed your father, Hayley. She's a murderer." Craig shouted, blaming himself for not taking Luke up on his offer to skip town a few months back. He wanted him to get that big promotion he had been working so hard for. He thought they would eventually get past the influence of his ex wife, but now he would know. She had taken away the one thing he loved more than anything in the world.

Captain Brass directed his men to take Craig into one of the empty interrogation rooms rather than a cell downstairs. He checked on his deputies and the lawyer that were shoved out of the way, before he made his way over to Greg. "Get that head seen to. What were you thinking letting him see her?"

Greg wiped away the blood from his forehead, shrugging his shoulders. "I didn't know he was going to do that. Did we get the go ahead to print them?"

"Don't you worry about that. Go." He ushered him away, seeming a lot angrier than usual as a child had witnessed the whole thing. "I'll call someone else down from the lab to get their prints."

"I can still do it." Greg argued.

"I don't want you anywhere near this case. Get out." Brass ordered, making his way back to his office.

"Here." Deputy Metcalfe handed the younger man a wad of tissues from his desk, once the Captain was out of the way. "I can drive you to the hospital."

"It's just a scrape." Greg touched his forehead again, feeling a bump where his head had collided with the edge of the cabinet in Brass's office.

"C'mon," The man grabbed his car keys, not taking no for an answer. "The hospital is on my way home anyway." He couldn't say no, so Greg reluctantly followed him to the car, letting him take him to the hospital. He didn't want to worry Nick with the slightest bump, so he let them treat him, before Metcalfe drove him back to his apartment.

As he suspected, Nick was still tucked up in bed with Sadie curled up beside him. He kicked off his shoes at the foot of the bed, perching himself on the end as he watched the two of them sleeping. He couldn't imagine losing everything in one night like Craig had. He got a call from Warrick while he was at the hospital, telling him that the ex wife had been arrested after she confessed to smashing Luke over the head with the flowers vase. The fingerprints all over it confirmed her story and Archie managed to match up the burnt picture to their old wedding photo that Luke had kept on his mantle after all these years.

In one instant she had taken everything away from Craig, making him fear that his own ex boyfriend, Stuart could do the same out of jealously or anger.

Greg pulled his t-shirt off, pushing himself off the bed. He loosened his jeans on the way into the bathroom, picking the toys out of the sink so he could wash his face. He glanced up with water running down his face, looking at their toothbrushes sat side by side. Sadie didn't have a mouthful of teeth to brush yet, but Nick had picked out a toothbrush for her to get her used to it. He turned his gaze towards the shower, looking at the bottle of baby shampoo right beside Nick's shower gel. The apartment had become pretty crowded with all of their things over the past few weeks, but he never thought about moving before. At least if they moved to a house of their own, Stuart wouldn't be able to hassle them or do harm to his family while they slept in their beds.

After quickly brushing his own teeth, Greg climbed across his partner to get into bed beside him, waking him up with the warmth of his body against him. "Hey..." The Texan gave out a deep breath, tilting his head to the side to rest against Greg's. "You're home early."

"How can you tell what time it is without even looking at a clock?" He rested his arm over the man's chest, feeling his heart pounding against him.

"Because you're never home before the sun's up." He smiled without opening his eyes. "Are you okay?"

"I am now." Greg swung his leg over Nick's hip, perching himself on top of his sleepy partner. He waited for him to pry his sleepy eyes open, before he greeted him with a sunny smile. "I love the way you look at me when you first wake up."

"What happened to your head?" He noticed the white bandage on his head right away.

"The edge of a cabinet and a big guy's fist. It's okay though, he was upset. It doesn't even hurt anymore." Greg leant down to his level, sealing their lips together. He slid his hand down his partner's bare side, smiling against his lips as he pulled back. "I had a thought today."

"Uh oh." The older man teased him, placing his hands on Greg's hips as the younger man ground his hips against him. "About what?"

"You, me and Sadie, getting a house. We've been together nearly two months now. Sadie's gonna start crawling soon and this place is getting pretty cramped."

"Did somethin' happen today? Besides the bump to the head." Nick held onto him as he struggled to sit up, gently brushing his fingertips across his bruised forehead. "I think the last time I asked you about us gettin' a new house was two days ago and you still said no, so what changed?"

Greg looked into his eyes, before he leant forwards to wrap his arms tightly around him. He breathed in his familiar scent for a moment, before he told him all about the case he had been working today. He left out the part where Stuart came to visit him and Grissom found out about them, but he only really needed to know about Luke and Craig to know why he was so upset.

He kept his head on Nick's shoulder the whole time, keeping his arms tightly wrapped around him. He listened to his soft breaths after he finished explaining, feeling comforted by the pounding of his big Texas heart and the warmth of his strong arms around him.

"Nothin' is gonna happen to me." The Texan spoke softly, smoothing his hand to the centre of the younger man's spine. He pressed a kiss to his shoulder, sliding his hand down his spine as he pulled him closer. "You think I'd let anyone come between what we have now?" He pulled back from him slightly, sealing a kiss to his minty lips. He breathed out through his nose as he kissed him deeper, feeling the younger man surrendering to him completely.

He wished he was strong enough to act on that instinct, but he still didn't feel ready for the next step in their relationship. He pulled back from the kiss after a moment, resting their foreheads together.

"Are you serious about this house deal?"

"Yeah." Greg reached his hand up, brushing his thumb across the older man's chin. "I know I was never exactly for it before, but I couldn't bear the thought of losing you. I love you." He wiped his thumb across the man's lips, giving him a slight smile. "Besides, it might be kinda nice to get a bigger place together. We're practically on top of each other here. Not that I mind, but Sadie's gonna need her own space soon. There's not enough room here for her to crawl or play. And we'll need our own room. Your stuff can't stay in storage forever."

"So you're on board?"

"I'm in." He playfully nipped a kiss to his moist lips. "Just don't tell my Mom that we're house hunting, she'll want to join in and make us get a place with a guest bedroom for her visits."

"A guest bedroom wouldn't be so bad. You expect your Mom to crash on the couch when she visits?" Nick smiled against his lips, putting his arms around him once again. "What kind of house would you want to get?"

"Houses have kinds?" The younger man teased, sitting back on the man's thighs as he thought about it. "I don't know, I haven't really thought about it. I'm not too bothered about how big it is, just as long as it has the basics. You know, kitchen, front room, bathrooms, bedrooms... I guess a decent driveway would be nice. Maybe a garage and a small office where I can work at home. A garden might be nice, not that I'm really an outdoors person, but maybe for Sadie when she starts walking."

"Haven't thought about it much, huh?" Nick smiled back at him. "Do you wonna start lookin' with me? I've already started lookin' into realtors."

"You did?"

"Well I knew we'd need a place eventually. I just needed some time to bring you around to the idea. I want us to get a place where we both feel comfortable, so I haven't started lookin' at any houses yet." He gently brushed his fingertips across Greg's eyebrow, just beneath the bandage that was stuck to his head. "I don't want anythin' to happen to you either. But you can't worry about every little thing. You'd drive yourself crazy. I learnt that with Sadie."

Greg smiled back at him, turning his attention to look at the sleeping baby girl beside them. He rested his head against Nick's shoulder, nodding his head against him. "We can start looking for a house. We should probably do it before she starts crawling, then we won't have to worry about baby proofing this death trap." He lifted his head to look the man in the eyes, before he merged their lips together for a kiss. He felt the man's hands holding his hips, wondering if a change of scenery would make him feel comfortable enough to finally go all the way with him.

Groaning as he heard the door, Greg reluctantly pulled back from the man, crawling for the end of the bed. "You're not expecting anyone are you?"

"No one knows I even live here, besides you."

"True." Greg pulled his jeans back on, grabbing his boyfriend's sweatshirt off the pile of clean laundry. He quickly pulled it on over his chest, hurrying for the front door before whoever it was left. He contemplated why that was a bad thing as he opened the door, coming face to face with the nightmare ex. "You..." He pushed Stuart out into the hall, pulling the apartment door shut behind him. "What are you doing here?"

"I have something for you." Stuart reached into his jacket pocket, pulling out a small jewellery sized box. "I know I was never sure about it all before, but I'm ready now. I can be the man you need." He opened the box, revealing the man's sized silver band with a jewel crusted into the front.

Greg took one look at it, before he frowned at the man. "You are kidding."

"No, I'm serious. This is what you always wanted from me and now I'm ready to be that man for you. Greg, will you..."

"No." The younger man struggled not to laugh at what he was about to ask him. "What part of I will never forgive you don't you understand? Not only did you break my heart, but you completely destroyed any trust I had for you. There is no way in hell I would ever consider being with you again and I'd certainly never consider marrying you." He didn't mean to be harsh, but the man didn't seem to listen to anything else he had told him.

"Is that his?" Stuart lowered the ring, looking at the sports sweatshirt the younger man was wearing. He could immediately tell that it wasn't his from the size and he knew it wasn't his usual style either. "Is he here?" He pointed over his shoulder towards the apartment door. "This new guy you're seeing, he'll never love you like I do."

"You never loved me. You still don't now. If you did, you wouldn't do something like this. You're only here because I stupidly called you when I needed someone to talk to."

"Greg please, just give me a chance." He snatched the younger man's hand from his side, shoving him against the wall. He pinned him with his body, practically bending his finger back to try and place the ring.

Greg managed to clench his fist to keep the hideous ring off his finger, spotting Nick out of the corner of his eye. He had a clenched fist of his own, directed at the other man holding Greg captive against the wall. He heard the thud as his fist collided with his face, followed by the clatter of the ring against the floor.

"Are you okay?" His hero immediately checked on him first.

"Yeah." Greg rubbed his sore hand, starting to wish he had never got out of bed today. He could smell the stench of alcohol on Stuart after he was so close though, realising why he had resorted to such drastic measures. He placed his hand on Nick's bare chest to stop him from taking it further, feeling a little sorry for his ex as he scrambled across the hallway to pick up the tacky ring. "Look... Stuart, you and me... we're done. We're just not right for each other."

"And he is?" Stuart slotted the ring back into its box, looking at the man who had clocked him. He had pulled on a pair of sweatpants in his haste to see what the racket was, but he had forgotten his t-shirt, giving him a full view of what Greg saw in him.

"I think it's time for you to go." Nick motioned towards the elevator, following him all the way to the sliding doors. "Don't come around here anymore. And if you ever hurt Greg again, you'll be leavin' in a body bag." He pushed the button to take Stuart to the first floor, taking a step back with his arms folded across his chest, hoping he looked intimidating enough to steer him clear of Greg for good.

Nick returned to the apartment once the elevator reached its destination, grabbing a handful of ice from the freezer compartment. He dropped them into a towel, gently resting it on the back of Greg's hand. He made sure he could still bend his fingers, relieved that nothing bad had happened to him. "So, that's Stuart? You really dated that guy?"

"Yeah." Greg smiled back at him, putting his back to the counter. "You're not gonna get all jealous are you?"

"No." He shook his head, hearing his cell ringing from the bedroom. He handed the ice pack over to Greg, pressing a kiss to his forehead. "Because I know that you're mine." Nick took off for the bedroom before his phone woke the baby, not recognising the caller ID. "Stokes." He used his professional tone, starting to miss being at work even more.

Greg ditched the melting ice in the sink, leaning over the counter to watch Nick's expression. He couldn't tell who he was on the phone to, but he looked a little upset. He waited until he finished, before he made his way over to him, perching himself on the bed beside him. "Are you okay?"

Nick nodded slightly, giving out a sigh. "That was Grace. She's in town." He glanced at his sleeping baby girl on the bed beside them. "She wants to see the baby."

* * *

 **Thank you for reading. That's the last one for today, please review.**

 **Have a great weekend!**

 **~ Holly**


	15. Chapter 15 - Father

**Chapter Fifteen - Father**

"There's almost twenty questions on this sheet." The Texan anxiously adjusted the clipboard on his lap, feeling as though he had just been given a surprise pop quiz. He glanced up at Greg in front of him, smiling at him as he had the easy job of holding Sadie, leaving him to answer all the questions before her six month check up appointment. "Is your baby interested in the world around them? How am I supposed to know that, she's not even talkin' yet."

"She seems pretty interested." Greg brushed his fingers across her little head, trying to comb down her static hair. She almost had a full head of it now, the same beautiful brown as her father. He could almost bunch it together at one side for an adorable little pigtail, but her father had opted for a little headband that had a strawberry pinned to the side instead. "Yesterday she stared at her bear for like ten minutes, before she burst into giggles." He reminded the man. "She looks out the car window when we drive."

"Have you noticed anythin' unusual with her eyes or the way she looks at us?" He continued to ask for his input, spotting Greg shaking his head after a quick look in her eyes. "I hate fillin' these things out. It's like they want you to diagnose your baby before you even see the doctor."

"She'd tell you herself if she could. The doctor doesn't see her everyday like you do."

Nick smiled back at him, loving the way he always put things in perspective for him. "Thanks for comin' with me."

"You're welcome. It was either this or sleeping." Greg smiled back at him, removing the pacifier from Sadie's mouth as she tried to spit it out again. "Any word from Grace?"

"Yeah, I'm meetin' her later for coffee." He anxiously clicked the pen on and off as he thought about it. "Catherine is gonna look after Sadie for a while, since you'll be workin' by then."

"You're not bringing her with you?"

"She tried to take her away from me, just to put her up for adoption." He reminded the man, filling in the answer of another question. "I'm takin' my sister along for backup. Because I didn't take it further, I can't legally stop her from seein' her. You'd think it would count that she actually tried to give her up, but she has the legal right to change her mind whenever she likes."

"That's not fair." Greg lifted the baby higher against his chest, planting a kiss on her cheek.

"It's the law, G." Nick ditched the pen, leaving the last two questions blank. He took the form back to the nurse, getting a smile out of the woman as he handed it over. "Is it gonna be much longer?" He glanced at his watch. "She usually has her nap about now."

"The doctor is just finishing up with another patient. It shouldn't be too long." She tried to assure him.

Nick dropped back into his seat, looking at the time on his watch again. "Our appointment was ten forty five. It's almost... eleven forty." He rested his hands on his knees, looking at the floor tiles in front of him a moment, before he glanced up at the sound of his baby's gurgles. She had been finding her voice over the past few days, repeating the phrase 'da' more than others. He thought it might be an association to him 'Daddy' at first, but she seemed to assign it to everything at the moment.

"Stokes." A nurse exited the doctor's office, giving him a smile as she held the door open for him.

"C'mon," Nick picked up the baby carrier off the floor, making sure Greg could climb to his feet with the baby in his arms. He let him go in the office first, giving the doctor a smile, despite his annoyance for making them wait so long.

"Nick," The doctor shook his hand, glancing at the young man who was with him, before he turned his attention towards the baby. "Let's have Sadie up on the table. Have there been any problems since your last visit?"

"Not really." Nick lifted his daughter out of Greg's arms, placing her on the table. He knew the drill by now, but she still wasn't used to the routine. She cried the second she was down to her diaper, moaning louder as she was brought over to the scales to be weighed. She made the numbers on the scale bounce as she fussed, settling down the second she was lifted back onto the table to be measured. She tried to reach out for the tape as he measured the size of her head, gurgling as he stretched it out across the length of her body.

"Is she trying solids yet?" The man glanced up at Nick, gently opening her mouth to see if she had any teeth coming through yet.

"I haven't tried her on anythin' yet. She's been fine with just the formula so far. Most of the books I've read say six months is too early to try anythin', but my sister's tellin' me her kids were eatin' the same as her at this age."

"It's usually around four to six months that we recommend you start trying out a few solids. She's got one or two teeth coming in, so maybe something soft like bananas or pureed vegetables. Of course it's completely up to you when she starts. If she's not hungry with the formula then there's no reason to force it on her." The doctor pulled out his stethoscope from beneath his white lab coat, listening to Sadie's heart and lungs for a moment. He completed the rest of the checks within a few minutes, jotting down some notes in her file. "Has she shown any signs of rolling over or trying to sit up?"

"Not yet. When I lay her on her stomach, she tries to do a mini push up though." The anxious father watched him investigating any problems with her spine or legs, but she appeared to have full feeling and be able to move them on her own.

"She seems to be right on target for a baby of her size. Bearing in mind that she was premature, so she's not up to the full size of an average six month old at the moment. She's right on target though. I'd like to do her shots now. She hasn't been off her food or feeling unwell lately, has she?"

"No." Nick shook his head, reaching for her hand as she put her arm out to him. "What kind of shots?"

"The six month check up vaccines are combined in two shots. She's also due her flu shot for flu season, so it'll be three shots total. The nurse will talk you through them a little more. If you'll just give me a minute, I'll get things prepared." He gave the father a smile, stepping around the younger man to get out the door.

"Shots?" Greg leant against the table beside him. "You didn't tell me there would be shots."

"She's the one that has to get them, not you." He chuckled softly, scooping her closer to the edge of the table. "Your Mom told me you were terrified of gettin' shots. I didn't believe her until now. You went completely pale the second he even mentioned them." He gently combed down his daughter's static hair, glancing over his shoulder as the door opened. "Hi." He smiled at the familiar nurse as she stepped inside.

"Hello. Hey you," The woman gently tickled the little girl. "Look at you, you're getting big, aren't you? And you've got both your Daddies here with you today, huh? Lucky little girl. Hi, I'm Faith." She extended her hand towards the younger man.

"Greg. Hi." He felt a little embarrassed that she had identified him as her father right away, when he and Nick hadn't even discussed his role where Sadie was concerned.

"Now it's three shots today." Nurse Faith checked the notes on her chart. "And one to be taken orally, which we'll do first. She can stay lying down for this one. They usually kick up a fuss because the taste is pretty bad, but you never know, she might be one of the good ones." She smiled at them both, before she started setting up.

Sadie held onto Nick's fingers as the nurse gently dripped the first one into her mouth with a syringe. She cringed from the taste and tried to turn her head away, but she managed to get it all in her mouth without any tears.

While the nurse explained to Nick what was in the first shot, Greg reached out for Sadie's other hand, gently holding her fingers between his own. She didn't look worried about what was about to happen, putting all the worry on him as he could see the needles being prepared at the other end of the table.

Greg placed his hand over her tummy to keep her still, leaving Nick to hold her leg. The younger man cringed from the simple motion of cleaning the area of skin on her thigh, feeling a shiver running down his spine as the nurse brought the needle closer to the baby's leg. He clenched his eyes shut as it went in, keeping his hand put on her tummy as she let out a hellish scream. He knew it was for her own good, but her cries were heart breaking. He opened his eyes in time to see her furiously kicking her legs, watching Nick struggling to hold her leg down for the second shot. He could tell he wanted to pick her up and comfort her, but she still had two shots left to go.

For the final shot, Nurse Faith had to hold her little leg tight, surprised at how strong the tiny baby was. She stuck the little frog covered plaster over the final injection point, giving Nick a reassuring smile. He instantly scooped his daughter up, holding her close with one hand, while he tried to sooth her with the other.

"All done. I'm sorry, sweetheart. It's all over now though." Faith gently held the little girl's foot. She gave Nick a smile, leaving them to comfort her.

Nick pressed his lips to his baby girl's forehead as he held her, giving Greg a smile as he looked as though he was about to burst into tears himself. "She's fine. They don't hurt."

"Were you the one on the receiving end?" He took a step closer, gently placing his hand on her back. She was starting to settle already, but he could feel her chest hitching as she wheezed against her father's chest. "I think we need to go out for ice cream now."

"She can't eat ice cream, G."

"I meant for me." Greg placed his other hand on his chest, feeling his heart rapidly pounding. "That was horrifying."

"Aww," Nick reached his arm around him, hugging them both close. He pressed a kiss to soppy boyfriend's forehead, lifting Sadie into his arms now that she had settled down. "See, she's fine. She'll forget all about it as soon as we get out of here." He grabbed the diaper bag out of the carrier, finding a clean diaper for his daughter. He let Greg hold her a little longer to calm the both of them down, before he lay her down to change her, leaving Greg to dress her back into her onesie.

He held her while Nick talked things through with the doctor, learning what to look out for until their next visit. The doctor didn't seem as friendly as Nurse Faith, but he seemed to know what he was doing.

Sadie was out like a light as soon as they were back in the car, sleeping straight through their grocery shop against her father's chest, while Greg steered the shopping cart. She started to flutter her eyes open on the elevator on the way home, giving out her usual hunger cries as soon as they were inside. She didn't have to wait long for her father to heat up a bottle, before she was in his arms on the sofa for her lunch time feeding.

"Are you going to try her on solids?" Greg joined them a few minutes later, sitting cross legged with a plate of sandwiches. He took a bite of his own, watching his partner gazing into his baby's eyes.

"I don't know." Nick shrugged his shoulders, still worried about losing her now that Grace was back in the picture. "Maybe some pureed vegetables or somethin'. I might wait until she has a few more teeth though. She hasn't complained about the formula so far." He tilted his head to the side, watching Greg taking another bite of his sandwich. "You gotta bite for me?"

"Yeah." Greg picked up one of the other sandwiches off his plate, feeding a bite to Nick. He smiled as some of the sauce slopped down his chin, making him look even more delicious to him. "I kinda like spending the day with you." He admitted, brushing his thumb across the man's chin. He licked off the sauce from his thumb, giving him a smile. "Maybe not the whole baby torture thing with three needles, but I haven't seen you during the day since... Papa Olaf's funeral."

"I had an idea about that." He turned to look back at his baby girl, feeling her heart pounding against his arm. "I was goin' to ask you before, but it never really felt like a right time. Now that we're movin' in together... into our own house and everythin'..."

"You are getting to a point eventually, right?" Greg smiled at him, taking another bite of his sandwich.

"Yeah." He tilted his head back. "My point is that I don't want her callin' you Greg or Daddy's boyfriend. And to avoid confusion, you could be... Papa and I'll be Daddy. You know, after your Papa Olaf. If it's too weird for you..."

"It's not weird." Greg wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, inching a little closer to the man. "I'm cool with it, if it's really what you want."

"It is." Nick nodded his head, pecking a kiss to the man's cheek now that he was closer. "I don't want you to feel like you don't mean anythin' to her. I've seen the way you look at her when you hold her and you help me out with her in a way that makes me think you're not just doin' it for me, but for her. And I want you to mean somethin' to her, because I can tell you love her."

"I said I was okay with it." He couldn't help but smile. "I think I'm a bad influence on you. You never used to over explain things like this."

"You're a good influence on me. For the first time in my life, I can be myself around someone without worryin' that I'm gonna be locked up. I want Sadie to have that protection from you too. You may not be related to her by biology, but you're her family, because you're a part of mine now. I just wish that I could be everythin' that you need."

"I'm not pushing you to be anything other than you are, Nick."

"I know." He looked between the two of them. "But you might get sick of waitin' someday. It's not that I don't want to be with you like that... I just... I trust you, but it's hard to completely let myself go like that. It's scary how much I've fallen for you, without actually bein' that close to you."

"We've been close." He recalled their intimate moment in bed the other day. "You know not every gay couple does that type of sex. It's a myth that every gay guy likes anal. It's not something we have to do to prove that we're a couple. We can do other stuff."

Nick still felt a little awkward talking about it, but he was starting to feel more comfortable around him. "It's always been my favourite thing to do though. So I should be able to do it with my boyfriend. Do you like it?" He felt embarrassed to ask him that, but Greg seemed alright with it.

"I do."

The older man smiled through his teeth, giving him a curious look. "Which? You know, which way do you prefer or have tried?"

"Both." Greg finished off the last bite of his sandwich, keeping Nick's safe until Sadie had finished up with her bottle. "I've tried it both top and bottom. I don't really know which I prefer. I guess it really depends on the guy you're with."

Nick nodded slightly, tilting his head back as Greg slid his arm around his shoulders. "Why are you with me? You could easily have anyone you wanted. Why would you choose to be with me?"

"Maybe because I love you." He tilted his partner's head further back, sealing a kiss to his lips. "I don't want somebody else. I want you. I chose you, because I want to be with you." He gently brushed his fingertips down the side of his face, before he kissed him again. "Phone." He heard it ringing in the distance. He scrambled to his feet to grab it for him, trying not to look at the screen as he handed it over to him.

"Hello?" Nick carefully lifted his daughter into Greg's arms, letting her finish her bottle with him. "Yeah... well I think we're both available tomorrow. Okay, thank you." He hung up, giving Greg a smile. "That was our realtor. She's lined up a few houses for us to look at. You available tomorrow?"

"I sure am." Greg smiled at the baby in his arms. "I just thought it would take a few weeks, not just a few days. Are you ready to buy a house with the lab dork?"

"I'm not buyin' a house with the lab dork." He stepped closer, sliding his arms around him. "I'm buyin' a house with my gorgeous boyfriend. Besides, we don't even know if we'll find one that we both like. My Mama always said to never buy the first house you look at. It could takes us weeks or months to even find a house that we both agree on."

"Well that's no fun." Greg pouted his lip out, gently pulling the bottle out of Sadie's mouth once it was all gone. "We want a house before you start crawling, don't we? Are you gonna try her on some solids?" He brought it up again, actually a little excited about seeing her eat food for the first time.

"He said I didn't have to right away." He pointed out to him, smiling at the younger man. "Relax G, she'll try solids eventually. She's not hungry between her bottle feeds at the moment, so there's no point. My sister said she didn't try solids on hers for longer than six months. Her youngest didn't start on solids until he was almost ten months old. He just didn't show any interest." He slid his hands beneath his daughter's arms, lifting her back into his arms. He rested her head against his shoulder, gently patting her back as he took his seat on the sofa again. "Honestly, when she starts on solids is the least of my worries at the moment."

"Grace?" He guessed, returning to his side. "What's the worst she can do?"

Nick smoothed his hand up and down his daughter's back, looking into her eyes. "Take her away from me. That would be the worst thing. If she took her away from me now. She'd never remember me. I wouldn't even exist to her. She'd never know how much I loved her or remember anythin' we did together."

"That's not going to happen." Greg tried to assure him.

"How can you be sure?"

"Well I don't know the specifics of the law, but I'm pretty sure that the one who wanted to give the baby away can't then claim full custody of the baby a few months later. You're her primary carer. You've been there with her since the beginning. Grace may be her mother, but she doesn't know anything about her own baby because she abandoned her. Only an idiot would award her full custody."

"But we see it happen all the time." Nick tilted his head to the side, looking into Greg's eyes. "Fathers are pretty much second rate in the court room, especially a gay one who's currently shacked up with a boyfriend in a single roomed apartment. My own folks aren't even on my side and they don't even know about you... or me, really."

"Don't you ever get tired of seeing things in a negative way?" The younger man leant closer, gently combing his fingers through his boyfriend's luscious hair. "You worry too much. You're too beautiful to worry about so many things."

"You think I'm beautiful?" He had to admit that no one had ever said that to him before, not that he wanted them to, but coming from Greg it made him adore him even more. "You know if anyone else had said that."

"You'd punch their lights out?" Greg grinned widely, tracing his thumb down the side of Nick's cheek. "You are you know. You're the most beautiful man I've ever seen. After Hugh Jackman of course. Maybe that Shawn Ashmore guy as well. Oh and Orlando Bloom." He giggled as the older man playfully jabbed him in the ribs with a frown on his face. "I'm kidding. You're so much more beautiful than any of them combined." He swept his hand through his hair again, before he pressed a kiss to the side of his head. "Don't worry so much. It'll all work out. I got 'you' in the end, didn't I?" He smiled at him. "I better go get some sleep."

"You want us to go out?"

"No, I'm okay with you here." He pulled his t-shirt off as he backed up towards the bathroom, giving Nick a smile, before he disappeared inside to get ready for bed. He plucked out the toys from the sink to brush his teeth, smiling at the thought of Sadie learning to call him Papa as they got to know each other.

The truth was he would be devastated if Grace came in and took away the baby. He never even thought being a parent was a possibility for him, but now that he was a co-parent, he never wanted it to end.


	16. Chapter 16 - Joint Custody

**Chapter Sixteen - Joint Custody**

"Trust me, I am no stranger to the coordinating of schedules. Divvying up holidays or shuffling the kid between one house to the other. You'd think it would make me grateful that he didn't make it to the late teenage years, but I kinda wished he was around to take on half the burden. At least if he was around, I could have shipped her off to her father's for a few days to deal with her, while I got a break from it all." Catherine shared her insights with the younger man, not sure if she was helping him or scaring him at this point. He had less than thirty minutes left before Grace was due to arrive and the three of them went off to the park or something to play with their daughter and talk about the dreaded joint custody agreement. "Any idea what you're going to say to her?"

"Greg thinks we should leave it to the lawyers, but I don't feel that comfortable leavin' my kid's fate in the hands of the system. I mean I know it'll be my sister's husband representin' me and Sadie, but I don't feel comfortable about the whole court thing." Nick repacked the diaper bag for the third time, glancing up at the clock, before he started sorting through laundry. He called Catherine over for moral support, but he could really use a hug from Greg at this point.

"Did you even ask this Grace woman if she wanted custody?"

Nick shook his head, stacking Sadie's clothes on top of each other. "She mentioned it when we had coffee. I kinda ignored it, but then she went on to say that she wanted to see her. I figured custody would be the next step. What am I supposed to do?" He glanced up at the woman. "She's her mother. If I don't let her see her now, I'm gonna have to tell Sadie why her mother never came back for her. Or she's goin' to be taken away from me completely and never even know that I existed."

"You don't know that. Not for sure." Catherine realised that Greg was right about his negative attitude towards everything at the moment.

"Knowin' my luck though..."

"I don't think you have anything to be afraid of with the courts." Catherine circled the kitchen counter, helping him to fold the huge pile of laundry. "Michelle from the lab, the one with the six year old ballerina. When her daughter was first born, her ex wanted to take the baby for a week at a time, but the court awarded her sole custody for the first six months because she was breast feeding the baby. Babies bond with the parent that they're with for the first six months, so no court in their right mind would take her away from you now, especially because this is the first moment the mother has even shown any interest. Even adoptions only give you six months to change your mind. By that time it's already too late because the baby is attached to whoever has been looking after them during that time. Babies need stability. She has that with you."

"You seem pretty sure about that." Nick reached for the onesie she had folded, folding it his own way so it matched the others. "They always say that a baby needs their Mom more than their Dad."

"I think it really depends on who that Mom is." She pointed out to him. "If the Mom's a druggy and the Dad's the stable one. The court would award custody to him. I'm not saying Grace isn't entitled to meeting her daughter. I'm just saying there's no way she can take her away from you for good. You've done everything right in the parenting column. This woman abandoned her baby when she needed her the most." She handed him another onesie, noticing him glancing up to check the time again. "What's she like anyway? All I know about her is the fact that she dumped her baby on you."

"She was a waitress." The Texan remembered that much, taking the pile of his daughter's clothes through to the bedroom. "She's what my Mama would describe as an air head." He pulled open the middle drawer to the dresser, moving Greg's t-shirts aside to squeeze in a few more baby clothes. "I think her father's an engineer or a mechanic. She told me once, but I can't remember."

"That's it? That's all you know about her?" She looked at him surprised.

Knowing what they knew from working the jobs that they did, she thought he would have been a lot more cautious about something as precious as his daughter.

"No, not all." He stepped up to the crib to check on his sleeping daughter, before he turned back to the kitchen. "She has a younger brother. He went to jail for armed robbery or somethin'. He went off the rails at sixteen and they've all been cleanin' up his messes since. Her Mom's a teacher. Tenth grade, I think. I've never actually met the woman, but we've talked over the phone and through emails since the baby was born. I send her pictures of Sadie every so often. I've had more contact with her than I have, Grace."

Catherine left him to fold the rest of the clothes, putting her back to the counter. "What kind of joint custody would you be happy with?"

"None." He answered without any hesitation, but he knew that he would feel awful if he did that to her. Not because he cared about her, but because she was still the mother of his daughter. "How did you decide... with Lindsey?"

"Lindsey was old enough to decide for herself by the time we split. Plus her father and I had years worth of relationship before she was born. And a marriage. I think she kinda knew it was happening too, so she wasn't that surprised. In the beginning it was three and half days with each of us. Saturday, Sunday, Monday and Tuesday morning with me. Her father picked her up on Tuesdays and had her the rest of the week, until Friday evening. It worked out alright at first, but then it was every other week, before it turned into whenever she felt like it. I guess Sadie's not old enough to decide, so it all falls to you. You'll just have to decide on what's right for her."

Nick nodded slightly, clutching one of Sadie's onesies close to his chest. "I just can't bear the thought of losin' her, even for a minute. It sounds stupid but I even worry leavin' her with you or Greg for five minutes while I take a shower."

"That's not stupid. That's parenthood. Here you are responsible for a whole new life and you have no idea if you're doing it right. When you have a baby, your life kinda ceases to exist. I remember when I had Lindsey, I was terrified at the thought of just being someone's Mom. My life revolved around her feeding schedules, washing her clothes and watching rubbish day time television during the few hours she actually slept. But I never wanted to give her up once someone actually offered to help me with her."

Catherine checked the time on her own watch, pushing herself off the counter.

"Speaking of, I should get back home. She'll be getting back from school any minute now. I think I'll see her for about five minutes, before she retreats to her room." She smirked, tapping the younger man on the shoulder. "You have no idea what you have to look forward to with that little girl of yours. And I really don't want to ruin the surprise of the journey you'll have with her." She grinned widely, grabbing her jacket and bag from by the door. "Say hey to Greg for me."

"I will." He grabbed the door for her. "Hey, you haven't told anyone about us, have you?"

"No, you think I'd blab the one secret I managed to learn first?" Catherine grinned back at him. "I did learn it first right?"

Nick thought back to when he was packing away his apartment to leave for Texas, the moment Sara revealed that she knew about his feelings for Greg. "Oh yeah." He lied to her, letting her feel special. "You knew first. I mean, besides Greg. He knew before I did."

"Aww," The woman smiled again. "See, you can trust me. I wouldn't tell. Besides, I'm happy for the both of you. I wouldn't do a thing to ruin that." She pulled him in for a hug, sensing he needed one with the day he was about to have. "Call me later. Let me know how it goes."

"Okay." Nick waved her off, putting his back to his front door once it was closed. He pushed himself upright as he heard murmurs from his daughter. He wouldn't usually pick her up this soon after she woke up, but he just needed to feel her heart beating against him for a moment to calm himself down. He held her securely against his chest for the next few minutes, until the door buzzer finally went. He pressed his lips to his daughter's forehead, gently patting her on the back as he took her over to the baby carrier. He had a sudden thought to hide and pretend he wasn't in, but he couldn't do that to Grace. "Yeah." He answered the call of the buzzer.

"Hi, it's Grace." She shook from the cool breeze, stuffing her hands deeper into the pockets of her jacket. "Let me in, it's freezing out here." She shivered for another minute or two, before he finally pushed the buzzer to let her in. Grace hauled her suitcase in through the door, missing Nick's old place already as she saw the 'out of order' sign on the elevator, meaning she would have to take the stairs all the way up to his floor.

Flipping her pony tail over her shoulder, Grace started dragging the heavy suitcase up the stairs one at a time. She really regretted wearing her heels now, but they made her short legs look much longer than they actually were. Nick liked taller women, he said so when they were in that bar sometime last year.

When she finally reached the right floor, she gave out a long sigh of relief, carting her suitcase just a few extra feet towards the right door. She adjusted the hem of her top, sweeping her fringe from her face, before she reached out and gave the door a knock with her freshly polished nails.

Nick hesitantly made his way to the front door, inhaling a deep breath before he unlocked the door. He glanced straight towards the large suitcase at her side, feeling chills running down his spine. It appeared she had got the wrong end of the stick as he knew she already had a hotel room booked.

"Hi, you gonna invite me in?"

"What are you doin'?" Nick put his hand up to stop her from walking in. "When I said you could come by to see her, I didn't mean with luggage."

"It's just some of my things."

"Why are they here with you?" He remained in the doorway, stopping her from getting any closer. "Meetin' Sadie, it's not a way for us to get back together. There was never an us in the first place, so it shouldn't be that surprisin'."

"But you said we could figure something out to make it work between us."

"For the baby." Nick realised she hadn't even given her daughter a second thought during her decision. "Maybe we shouldn't do this today."

"What? Why?"

"Because this isn't exactly what I had in mind for meetin' your daughter."

"Yeah, like I'd want to spend any more time with a complete asshole." Grace didn't give her child a second thought again, turning in her uncomfortable heels to cart her luggage back down the stairs.

Nick dropped heavily to his sofa, disappointed that she didn't even ask to see the baby she abandoned before she left. He realised that Greg had been right all along. He had been expecting too much from the mother of his child, because he wanted his daughter to have the mother that would always be there for him in the same way his own was when he was growing up.

Glancing over to his daughter as she murmured, Nick smiled at her as she kicked her legs about, giving out an adorable squeal. He climbed to his feet to scoop her up, pressing his lips to her forehead. "You wonna go find, Papa Greg?" He already had the diaper bag packed up, so he thought they could be there when Greg finished his shift and take him out for lunch or something.

He loaded everything into his truck, giving Sadie a teething ring to play with, while he drove them off towards the lab. He texted his boyfriend to let him know there had been a change of plans, waiting patiently in the car until he finished his shift.

"Yeah, I'll see yah." Warrick waved off his colleague, pulling his phone out to check his messages. He glanced up as he saw something familiar, surprised to see Nick's truck parked up in its usual spot. He couldn't see anyone sat in the driver's seat, not like last time when he saw him kissing, Greg. As he got closer to the truck, he noticed the baby's car seat in the back and the boot of the car open. "Hey." He startled the man, watching him redressing his daughter after a quick diaper change in the back.

"Hi." Nick slid his hands beneath his little girl, lifting her against his shoulder. "You just gettin' off shift?"

"Yeah." The man stuffed his hands into his pockets, not sure what to say to him after what he had seen. Luckily he was saved from conversation by Sadie crying out in hunger. He left his former best friend and colleague to it, feeling even more uneasy about things between them. "I'll see yah then."

"Okay." Nick returned his daughter to her car seat in the back, wondering if it was the baby that had scared him off. He perched himself on the edge of the seat to feed her bottle to her, waiting for Greg to finish up with his case. He felt as though he had been waiting for hours, when the younger man finally emerged from the elevator, hurrying over to him with his bag swung over his shoulder.

"Sorry, sorry," He panted, sweeping his fingers through his wet hair. "I got held up."

"Showerin'?" His partner smiled, hooking his fingers into his boyfriend's belt loops. He gently tugged him towards him, grinning widely as he looked at his lips poised in front of him. "Did you shower for our benefit or have you got a hot date to get to?"

"A date. Older man." Greg sealed a kiss to his lips, moving his hand to his partner's hip. "Easy on the eyes. Pretty good kisser too."

"Pretty good? Only, pretty good." He curiously looked into his eyes.

"Well you kinda taste like spicy chicken and you're not really giving it much effort." Greg teased him, feeling his chest hitching as Nick suddenly pulled him into his arms, kissing him more ferociously this time. He could feel his hunger for him as their tongues tangled together in their mouths, reassuring him that he really did feel something for him.

Not that he had any doubt in his mind.

He eventually pulled back from his lips, keeping his arms around Nick's shoulders as he looked into his eyes. He had a lust for him in his eyes, but still no desire to act on that lust. He knew he said he'd be patient with him, but it was more like having a roommate in the apartment with him rather than a boyfriend.

"Much better. So, how did it go today with Grace?"

"It didn't." Nick pushed him back slightly, putting his arms around his waist. "She showed up with luggage, threw a tantrum when I wouldn't agree to her livin' with us then she left. Oh and I got this text like twenty minutes later." He pulled his phone out of his back pocket, handing it over to Greg.

"Sorry I was such a b..." Greg scrolled through the boring part of the message, making his way towards the end. "Can we do this again some time? I really want to meet, Sophie." He glanced up at Nick, realising why he sounded so bitter. "She didn't meet her then and she still doesn't know her name?"

"I'm hopin' it's a typo." Nick took his phone back, slotting it into his back pocket. "I know I wanted Sadie to have her mother, but I wanted one for her that could actually remember her name."

"I doubt she'll even notice the absence of a mother with the best father in the world taking care of her. Besides my own." He quickly added, placing his hands on Nick's hips. "She can't exactly miss something that she's never had." He slid his hands up towards his chest, hugging him tightly in his arms. "You're all she needs, Nicky."

Before anyone noticed them, they loaded into the car, making their way off to the store.

Greg held onto Sadie as they made their way around the store, pointing out various foods to try and get her to say them. She made a little effort towards the end of their trip, pointing her little finger out to something, saying 'da'.

"Maybe we should start with dog or duck?" Greg suggested, gently patting her on the back. "He's Dada." He pointed to Nick, watching the man packing their groceries into a bag. He felt his stomach rumbling as he watched the food going in, hoping they'd get to eat soon as he was beginning to feel a little light headed after his long shift. He meant to grab some lunch when they caught a break, but there was just so much to do.

He followed Nick towards the exit once he paid for their groceries, almost bumping into the back of him as he suddenly stopped halfway. He stepped around the man to see what he was looking at, following his gaze out the window. He caught sight of a woman standing beside his truck, anxiously checking her watch as she looked around the parking lot.

"Is that...?" Greg didn't even need to say her name out loud as he could tell from the look on his face. He had finally seen what Grace looked like and he felt a hint of envy rumbling through his stomach. She was nothing how he pictured. He imagined a woman from a mug shot considering how she harshly abandoned her own baby, but she was nothing like that.

Her tattered long red hair was tied back in a pony tail. She was slim built and quite pale, but he could see evidence of her former pregnancy in her abdomen where it showed through her tight t-shirt. She was wearing jeans beneath the t-shirt and a knit white cardigan than dangled over her hands. She looked nervous as she anxiously looked from left to right, waiting for Nick to return to his truck.

"You think she followed us?" Greg turned to look at the man beside him.

"Lo-jacked my truck more like." The older man bit his lip, trying to think of a plan to get rid of her. He didn't want to expose his daughter to her if she was still in a mood and he didn't really want her to meet Greg either. It would be like his two worlds colliding and he couldn't handle that right now. "Have you got my keys?" He turned to look at his boyfriend.

"Yeah." Greg dug them out of his pocket. "What are you gonna do?"

"I'm gonna go out alone, see what she wants. Stay here with Sadie. You got your phone on you?"

"Uh huh," He adjusted the baby against his side, not getting a say in the plan as the older man took off as though he was on a mission. He figured he should wait there while he carried out his escape, hoping he didn't thump Grace the way he was charging towards her. He couldn't tell what he was saying from this angle, but he seemed pretty angry with her.

Greg actually started to feel a little sorry for the woman. He didn't really know her, but she was the mother of the baby he was currently holding in his arms and she was being denied access on a technicality.

Grace threw her arms up in the air, looking as though she was trying to defend herself for a moment, before she started pleading with him. She clung to his arm, begged him to take her back, but he was adamant in his decision. Nick loaded the groceries into the back of his car, ignoring her consistent whines as he climbed into the driver's seat. He had to wait for her to move out of the way, before he could pull out of his parking spot and drive off, leaving the ones he really loved behind.

Once the coast was clear, Greg took a seat in the taxi bay, sitting Sadie against his chest. He let her hold his phone while they waited for Nick's call, feeling his stomach rumbling with hunger even more and he was no closer to filling it with food.

"You lost, Greggo?" He eventually heard a familiar voice, glancing up to see Warrick stood in front of him. He shielded his eyes from the sun, looking up at the familiar face. "Hey, where's your car?"

"Still at the lab." Greg adjusted the baby against his chest, feeling pretty pathetic.

"How'd you get here?" Warrick took a few steps closer towards him, sensing some tension. "I can give you a ride. I was just gonna pick up some stuff. You want a ride?" The man motioned over his shoulder towards his sports car that only had two seats in the front.

"With the baby?" Greg motioned towards her in his arms, giving the older man a smile. "Thanks, but we're waiting for Nick to come back." He took his phone back from Sadie before she threw it off the bench trying to wave at Warrick. "That's your Uncle Warrick, he hasn't seen you since you were tiny."

"Yeah she has a full head of hair now. Almost." He noticed, taking a seat beside the younger man. He reached out for her little hand as she continued to wave at him, giving her a smile. "So this thing between you and Nick, it's still serious?"

"Might be. Does that bother you?"

"Not so much. It's just... he's been my best friend going on six or seven years now and he never even mentioned, let alone hinted to the fact that he..." Warrick let go of the little girl's hand as she pulled away, feeling so betrayed by his best friend. "I didn't have a lot of friends growing up. Nick... he's been the first real friend I've ever had that actually gave a crap about me. The being gay thing doesn't even bother me that much, it's just the fact that he lied to me all this time. I don't even care if he does like men. He's still Nick. I only care that he's lied to me. I feel betrayed and that's hard to forget."

"Shouldn't you be telling this to him?"

"I tried. Today." He admitted. "I saw him in the parking lot with her, but I couldn't talk to him. I wanted to, but I couldn't." He glanced up at Greg beside him. "How am I supposed to know if he's even gonna tell me the truth now? I don't trust him anymore. At least you've always been open about who you are. I don't even know who he is anymore."

"He's still the same old, Nick. He hid this one part of himself from everyone, including himself since he was still a kid. How do you think he feels?"

"So I'm supposed to be more sympathetic towards the man who betrayed me?"

"Maybe just a little." Greg smiled at him, feeling a little bit like a therapist lately. "What harm could it do? He's still your best friend. I'm not going to take him away from you. I love him, but that doesn't mean that he's all mine."

"You love him?" He caught what he said, looking at him slightly surprised. "I just thought you guys were... you know, screwing or something. I didn't think that you were... like that."

"No such luck." He let another aspect of their lives slip. "Is that what you think two guys do together all the time? Because it's basically just like any other relationship. We go on dates, talk, kiss. If it helps, just think of me as Nick's new girlfriend. Only we don't exactly have to worry about any future pregnancy scares." He playfully tickled Sadie in his arms. "We both want to find love and happiness, buy a house, go on vacation... maybe exchange rings and have a family together. Normal stuff."

"I never thought of it like that."

"Why?" Greg gave him a curious look. "Because we shouldn't be together?"

"No." He shook his head, anxiously looking down at his hands. "What I've seen on TV... gay guys on the movie channel are never exactly monogamous. They're always like obviously gay too. Nick's never been like that."

"Because he doesn't wear a tight tank top or a pink scarf around his neck?" The younger man smirked, shaking his head at the man. "Don't believe everything you see on TV, Warrick. He's still Nick, he's not gonna camp it up because he came out."

Warrick gave him a slight nod, wanting to believe it and forgive the man, but he still felt as though he had betrayed him. "Looks like your ride is here. FYI, Nick never dates anyone before he's slept with them. He says they're not worth his time if they're no good in the sack. I think he's only officially dated two women since I've known him, so he must really like you." He gave him his own little piece of advice, motioning towards the truck entering the parking lot. "I'll see yah tomorrow." He climbed to his feet, leaving him to it before he had to make any more awkward small talk with Nick.

Greg waved goodbye to him, thinking over what he said. He knew he meant it to be a positive thing, but he only saw the negative side where Nick hadn't slept with him because he didn't think he was worth his time.

"Was that Warrick?" The Texan climbed out of his truck, pulling open the back door beside him. He moved the buckles out of the baby carrier, letting Greg lift her in by himself. "Is he mad at me in some way that I don't know about?"

"Yeah." He buckled Sadie into her seat, turning to look at Nick beside him. "He knows." He watched the man's jaw dropping, followed by the blood draining from his face. "He's okay with us... he's just pissed that you lied to him."

"You told him." Nick immediately accused him.

"No, he saw you kiss me. I haven't told anyone. Since you came out to me, you've told Catherine, Sara, your sister, my neighbour... thanks for that one by the way, as if she didn't already hate me enough." Greg closed the back door, pulling away from Nick to make his way around to the passenger's side door. He pulled his seatbelt on, staring out the window beside him as he heard Nick climbing inside.

"So now you're pissed at me too?"

Avoiding eye contact with him, Greg answered, "Can we please just go home?"

Nick started up the engine, slowly pulling away from the store. He had plans for a lunch date with his boyfriend, but as soon as they got back to the apartment, they went their separate ways. As far away from each other as the single roomed apartment would allow anyway.

"She's down for the count." After an hour or so of trying, Nick finally got Sadie down for her nap, perching himself on the bed where Greg was laying. "What did I do to piss you off then? Is it somethin' that Warrick said to you?" He crawled closer towards him, dropping his head to the pillow beside him. "C'mon, what did I do?" He placed his hand on Greg's hip, moving close enough to feel the warmth of his body against his own. "I can't fix it if I don't know what I did."

"Do you even like me?" Greg finally spoke, lifting his gaze to look into Nick's eyes.

"Of course I do. You think I don't?" He combed his fingers through the younger man's hair, looking into his eyes. "I didn't want any grief from Grace back at the store."

"It's not because of that." He rolled back to put some distance between himself and Nick. "Everyone at the lab knows now. Catherine, Warrick, Sara, Grissom... Brass. Oh don't worry, they're all on your side with the coming out thing. They just think you're an idiot for being with someone like me. Well except for Warrick, he's still pissed that you lied to him for as long as you did. And Sara seems to think it's my fairytale ending."

"Since when do you care what people think?" Nick crawled closer, putting his arms around the younger man as he tried to move further away again. He spooned him tightly across the middle of the bed, listening to his heart beating through his back for a moment. He often listened to the sound of his heart when he couldn't sleep. Sometimes just the sight of the beautiful angel sleeping beside him was enough to do the trick. "That can't be why you're mad at me. You were fine before the grocery store."

"I've had it on my mind all day actually." He thought about the conversation he had with Catherine earlier, followed by the topic of his love life or lack of one anyway with Warrick. "Catherine said... she said that you're only with me because I'm convenient. Grissom doesn't think it'll last once you get back to the real world. He thinks the isolation from your normal life has made it easier for you to pretend that everything is okay. And I think that's why you cancelled that appointment to view the house."

"What do they know about us?" Nick climbed over him, trying to get him to look into his eyes. "I haven't isolated myself. I still do everythin' I used to do, except go to work and hang out with Warrick. I still see the same friends I used to. What does Grissom know about relationships anyway? This is the man who isolates himself on a daily basis. And you think I'm with you because you're convenient? I gave up my family to be with you. I'll admit that it wasn't what I was lookin' for, but you mean more to me now than... anyone I've ever met. I cancelled that appointment because the house had one bedroom. The moron realtor didn't listen to a word I said to him." He lifted his chin, sensing there was still something he wasn't telling him. "What did Warrick say to you? C'mon, give me a chance to defend myself from somethin' he said about me."

"It doesn't matter."

"Yes it does." Nick snapped back at him. "I have a right to know if it's the reason why you're pissed at me. Tell me."

Greg gave out a soft sigh, feeling a little awkward for bringing it up. "He said that you always sleep with your dates on the first date so you can tell if they're worth your time. I guess Grace didn't exactly make the cut. And I do feel as though I'm just convenient for you. I was there for your escape from having to move back home to your parents and now I'm the roommate left holding the baby in the car park."

"You said you didn't care if we slept together or not."

"Maybe that's just something I need to feel when I'm in a relationship with someone. I haven't had as many relationships as you, but I've always had that intimacy connection. If I even get remotely close to you, you push me away as if I disgust you or something."

Nick rolled his body away from Greg, staring up at the ceiling above them. "So much for the tell each other everythin' clause in our relationship." He placed his hands on his stomach, feeling a little sick from where this conversation was leading. "I don't think I can... so maybe this you and me thing is a stupid idea."

"You're breaking up with me?" Greg struggled to sit up, feeling a little queasy himself.

"It's not workin'. Not to your standards, so what's the point? There's no point in stayin' with someone if they want different things."

"We had one argument and your solution is to break up." He felt tears in his eyes, wishing he could throw him out right now, but the baby was sleeping and it would take him ages to pack up enough things to leave. "Have you even been in a relationship before or is it just one night stands that have notched up your bed post? Why could you sleep with 'all' of them and not me? You're willing to give it a try with a complete stranger, but for me you're calling it quits after one argument. Why? What's so wrong with me that makes you feel sick whenever we get close?" He climbed off the bed, escaping to the bathroom before he saw him cry.

He closed the door behind him, sliding the lock into place. He wished that he would come after him or fight for him, but the apartment was completely silent.

Greg leant against the sink counter, feeling as though he was going to throw up the lunch he had only just eaten. He sank down the cupboard as he realised what he had just done, wishing he could take it all back and just go back to how they were. If he had just kept his mouth shut, things would have been fine.

But why wasn't he worth fighting for. Did Nick ever have any real feelings for him?

* * *

 **It's not over yet. Thank you for reading, more on the way soon.**

 **Please review.**

 **~ Holly**


	17. Chapter 17 - Heart Broken

**Chapter Seventeen - Heart Broken**

"Slow down, Greggo." Catching the knocked over beer, Warrick quickly stood it back up, before he got a lap full of alcohol. When he agreed to go out for an after work drink, he had no idea he'd be babysitting a man who was drowning his sorrows. He seemed a little out of it today during their case, but he just figured he was tired or something. "You don't need another one. I'm not letting you sleep it off on my couch again."

"You're such a ball buster." Greg frowned at him, struggling to get out from under the table. He stumbled over the leg of one of the other chairs, taking a moment to adjust himself before he tried to make his way over to the bar. He could still feel the pain in his heart, so it clearly wasn't enough to dull the ache of his broken heart.

"I got it." Warrick reached over the younger man, grabbing the fresh beer bottle from the bartender before he could. He held it back out of Greg's reach, keeping him at arm's length. "Not until you tell me what happened."

"Why do you want to know so badly?"

"Because you're a wreck."

Greg gave out a sigh, putting his back to the bar. "Nick left me. He doesn't think that I'm worth his time. So I guess you can have your best friend back, because he certainly doesn't want to be with me anymore." He grabbed the man's arm while he was off guard, snatching his beer back from him. "Are you happy now? You got your wish."

"Why would I be happy about that? I never made such a wish."

"None of you wanted us to be together in the first place, so congratulations you 'all' got your wish." He tipped the beer back in his mouth, spilling some drips down his chin. He spied a man staring at him from the opposite end of the bar, gently pushing the older man aside. "Onto bigger and brighter things, I guess. You can go." He ditched the beer, wiping his lips on the back of his hand. "I got things to do."

"Greg..." Warrick caught his wrist, pulling him back towards him. "You don't want this. Less than two days ago you told me that you loved Nick. Feelings like that don't just go away and you can't ignore them. If you really ever loved him, you wouldn't be able to go through with this."

"So he breaks up with me and I'm the one who gets punished?" He pried his wrist free from Warrick's grip, taking a step away from him. He continued on his route towards the other end of the bar, towards the heavy set stranger eyeing him up.

Warrick watched from a distance as they started talking, giving up with a heavy sigh. He knew what a broken heart felt like and he knew that there was no reasoning with the man. He also knew that a rebound wasn't going to help, but he couldn't exactly stop a grown man from getting what he wanted. The least he could do was give the ex boyfriend a little heads up though. He took his phone outside, gulping a deep breath before he hit Nick's speed dial on his cell.

"Hey it's Warrick," He answered, putting his back to the wall outside the bar.

"Hi," Nick sounded surprised to hear his voice. He was the last person he was expecting a phone call from. "What's up?"

"I know this is none of my business, but I heard about you and Greg breaking up. He's taking it really hard, man." He listened to the younger man breathing a moment, before he asked, "Do you love him? If you do, why don't you fight for him? It doesn't matter to me if you do, but you can't let him tear himself up like this."

"He's... he's not my problem anymore."

"He is your problem. How can you even say that? Did you forget about the fact that you used to be friends?" He waited for an answer, but he could only hear Nick breathing again. "You can't put him through this. If you ever had any real feelings for him, you wouldn't let him go through this."

"It's better for both of us." Nick finally spoke, giving out a heavy sigh. "I can't... I can't be what Greg needs. If you love somethin' enough, you let it go."

"If it comes back to you, then it's yours forever." Warrick added, peering through the open doors of the bar to search for Greg. He spotted the younger man sat alone at the bar, wearing a glum look on his face as he stared off into space. He was glad that he didn't manage to hit it off with that guy, but he still had to get him back with the man he was supposed to be with. "I admit that I wasn't exactly on board with you and him at first, but seeing how upset Greg is now... I've never seen our Greggo this torn up about something before. He loves you. If you really love him back then why don't you put him out of his misery and tell him?"

"He's... I just can't."

"Do you love him?" Warrick demanded to know, pacing the walkway in front of the bar. "C'mon man, it's a simple question. Do you love him?"

"Yes." Nick answered without even thinking, giving out a soft sigh. "But it's not as simple as that."

"It's as simple as you make it, Nicky. My Grandmother told me that. There's no need to complicate every little thing. If you love him then you should be with him. So get your arse down here before you completely ruin any chance you ever had with him."

"You don't understand." Nick wished it was that simple, but it was much more complicated than just a quick fix.

"I don't need to understand everything to know that you two should be together. We're at our usual. Come down here and talk to him. If you don't get here in," Warrick pulled up his sleeve, looking at the time on his watch. "Twenty minutes, I'm gonna drag you down here myself."

"What about the baby?" Nick glanced round at her, realising he didn't have a choice.

"Leave her with your sister." He pointed out the obvious to him. "He told me you were staying with her now. C'mon, this is Greg we're talking about. One more drink and he's gonna be flat on his back."

Nick snickered softly, throwing his head back with another sigh. "Alright, give me a few minutes to get dressed."

"Get dressed?" Warrick turned his wrist to look at his watch again. "Were you in bed, Nicky? It's barely ten o' clock."

"Yeah, but I'm on a baby's schedule." He pointed out to him, relieved to even be able to talk to his best friend again. "I'll see yah in a bit." He hung up, checking on the baby in her crib. He really didn't like leaving her while she was sleeping, just in case she woke up wondering where he had gone, but Greg was equally as important right now. He had no idea what he was going to say to him or if he'd even want to see him, but he felt as though he had to now.

Nick threw on some clothes, combing his fingers through his hair as he looked at his reflection in the mirror. He knew he couldn't be what Greg wanted, no matter how much he tried to let go, but he owed some kind of explanation after walking out on him two days ago.

When he arrived at their usual bar that they often drank at after a long shift, Nick spotted Warrick straight away, leant against the bar talking to a woman in a low cropped black dress. He rolled his eyes at the man, searching the crowd for Greg. It was busy this time of night, but he found him within a few seconds, sat in a booth on his own. The look on his face was heart breaking, but there was no sign of any beer bottles in front of him, so he figured he was still lucid enough to talk.

"Hi." Nick stuffed his hands into his jeans pockets, stepping into his line of sight. "Do you... want a ride home?"

Greg pursed his lips together, really wanting to get out of here, but accepting a ride from the man who broke his heart and put him in this state seemed a little stupid. He gave out a sigh, grabbing his jacket off the chair beside him. "Okay." He slid out of the booth, guessing Nick just rolled out of bed by the state of his hair, but he looked absolutely delicious to him.

This was definitely a bad idea.

Letting Nick lead the way to his truck, Greg felt butterflies in his stomach, not sure if it was the alcohol or because he had his eyes on the backside of the man he adored. This was a terrible idea and it was only getting worse as Nick pulled open the passenger side door like a perfect gentleman. He made it impossible to hate him or even stay mad at him over what he had done.

He held his stomach as he watched Nick running round the front of the car, getting the car ready to drive him home. He was expecting a big speech about how this would be better for them to be apart, but the drive all the way back to his apartment was completely silent.

He could hear every breath whistling from Nick's nose. It was eerie and depressing. This was his life from now on. No boyfriend and no best friend either.

The Texan finally pulled his truck up outside his apartment building, shutting the engine off. He turned to look at Greg without taking his seatbelt off, trying to think of something to say to him. He looked just as adorable as he remembered. He hadn't actually seen him since he broke up with him on his bed the other day, but he looked so heartbroken and felt so distant to him. "Greg..."

"Don't." He stopped him, before he could apologise or make up some kind of excuse for what he did.

"I just want to talk. Can you just look at me for a second?" Nick reached out for his hand, watching as he slowly turned his head to look at him. He couldn't look him in the eye, but at least he could see his familiar beautiful features again, even if they were filled with sadness. "What I did, I did it for you. I'm not what you want or what you need. You want someone who can actually..."

"I said it didn't matter." Greg interrupted him.

"You also said that why could I do it with all of those women and not you. I don't want to be the cause of your broken heart."

"Too late." The younger man snapped. "You already are."

"You would have been more heartbroken after years of waitin' for me to be comfortable with bein' that close to you." Nick tried to explain, but the younger man was too heartbroken to listen to his reasons. "You don't need me. You can find someone else to be what you need." His voice broke with emotion as he said it, but he knew it wouldn't work.

"That would work out great if I didn't love you so much." Greg muttered, reaching for the door handle beside him. "What if I don't want someone else?" He turned back to look at him. "I've wanted to be with you for six years and in less than ten weeks you've already decided that I should be with someone else. Well I don't want to be. I love you for who you are, not what you can or can't do. It's too late to tell me to be with someone else, because I've already fallen for you. It may be easy for you to just shut down your emotions like that, but I can't. Believe me I've tried before, but it's too hard."

"You think I don't love you?"

"No. If you did, you wouldn't be able to do this to me." Greg pulled open the door, stepping out onto the curb. "I don't think you ever had any real feelings for me at all. I'm just your little experiment to see if the pretending to be gay thing works out." He slammed the door shut, hoping he hurt the man's precious baby as he hurried up the stairs to his apartment. He took the stairs up two at a time, searching for his keys as he reached the door. He realised he had left his jacket in Nick's car with his keys in the pocket during his haste to get away. "Nice one, Greg." He gave out a heavy sigh, putting his back to the apartment door.

So much for the quick getaway from his ex.

He didn't even have his phone on him to call him back.

"Forget somethin'?" He heard a voice coming from the other end of the hall. He rolled his eyes as Nick made his way towards him, holding his jacket in his hands. He went to grab it back, but Nick suddenly pulled it out of his reach before he could grab it. "Can I just talk to you for a second? Just hear me out, if you don't like what I have to say, then I'll go."

"Fine... give me my keys." He held his hand out for the jacket. "Unless you want all my neighbours to hear your excuse for ditching me like that..."

Nick handed it over, waiting for him to unlock the door, before he followed him inside. He grabbed his arm as soon as they were inside, using the younger man's body to close the door behind them. He looked more than a little surprised by the sudden advance, but he was waiting for him to make the first move with baited breath.

"You think I don't want to be with you?" Nick pinned his body to the door with his own, giving him just enough room to breathe. He brushed their lips together, looking into the younger man's beautifully glazed eyes. "Ever since you kissed me in that locker room, I haven't been able to get you out of my system. You're all I think about, dream about... I want to be close to you, but I'm scared. When I pull away from you, it's because I'm terrified about what will happen. Not because I don't want to be with you."

"You're scared of me?"

Nick shook his head, brushing their noses together as he did it. "To me. I'm terrified of what will happen to me. I know nothin' bad will happen while I'm with you, but I can't stop myself thinkin' about the last time I was with a man." He placed his hands on Greg's hips, resting their foreheads together as he breathed in his familiar scent.

"Maybe you do have PTSD, just not over the psycho stalker."

"Maybe I do." Nick playfully ground his hips against his partner's, reaching out for his arms at his sides. "I thought by lettin' you go I'd be savin' you from bein' stuck with me, the psycho boyfriend who freaks out whenever you get close, but you're still all I can think about. I was ready to give you up, but when I saw you tonight... I want you to be happy. But I kinda want you to be happy with me."

"I was... until I..." Greg placed his hands over Nick's, looking into his eyes. "I meant what I said in the beginning. I'll give you as much time as you need. I just want to be with you. I can help you through this." He weaved their fingers together. "I've helped you through panic attacks before. I can help you through this. I'm willing to wait as long as it takes."

"You shouldn't have to 'settle' with me."

"I haven't 'settled'. I've dated guys that only wanted to be with me to get in my pants, before they hit the road. Believe me, you are definitely worth my time." He peeled himself off the door, making a brave move towards his former boyfriend to try and win him back with a kiss. He hooked his arm around his shoulders to pull him closer, feeling his hunger for him as their tongues tangled together. He felt Nick pulling him away from the doorway, stumbling backwards a few steps towards the bedroom. He broke the kiss as he collapsed onto the bed, watching Nick unbuttoning his shirt above him. "What are you doing?"

"I'm not denyin' I have an arm where my arm is. And I'm givin' in to my favourite chicken pizza." Nick used the familiar metaphor that Greg once used to explain his taste in men.

Greg smiled slightly, crawling back on his elbows towards the middle of his bed. "You don't have to do this you know."

"Way to motivate me, G." He grinned back at him, pushing the younger man's knees apart as he climbed on top of him.

Instead of explaining to him why he wanted to do this, Nick moved straight into kissing him, trying to block any other thoughts from his mind. He slid his hands beneath the younger man's t-shirt as their tongues tangled around each other, wanting to taste his flesh with his tongue.

"I mean it, you don't have to prove something to me." Greg tried to stop him again, actually wondering why he was doing it himself. He figured he must have been just as terrified, only he had a belly of alcohol while Nick was as sober as they come. "I want to be with you again. But you don't have to push yourself out of your comfort zone to..."

He was abruptly cut off by Nick placing his finger across his lips. He stared into the older man's eyes for a moment, feeling a chill running down his spine as the man studied him carefully.

"Greg," He brushed his finger across his lips to the corner of his mouth. "I mean this in the nicest possible way... but can you shut up?" Nick devilishly grinned against his lips, before he pulled him in for a kiss.

Sweeping Greg's t-shirt off his chest, Nick forced his arms upwards, breaking their kiss for just a moment. He gently sucked the younger man's bottom lip with his own, moving his kiss down to his chin. He licked a warm path down his neck, grinning widely as the younger man squirmed under his touch. He continued his kisses down the centre of his chest, using Greg's breathing as a guide of the intensity of his kisses. He found a sweet spot just above his navel, making the younger man's hands curl into fists at his sides. He wasn't surprised to find another sweet spot closer to his chest, feeling him squirming even more as he enveloped his mouth over his left nipple.

"Nicky..." He gasped for breath, gripping the covers tightly beneath him. He gave out a gasp of relief of he finally let go, only to move over to the right nipple, making the feeling even more intense. He thought he was about to explode right there and then, but Nick stopped just in time to seal their lips together. He started to work open Greg's jeans as they kissed, gaining just enough confidence to strip him naked, before he started on himself.

"Why are your feet always so cold?" The Texan snickered, crawling under the covers with him.

"Bad circulation? Or maybe I just need somebody to warm me up." Greg adjusted the pillows behind him, letting Nick snuggle in beside him. He lifted his arm over his head, looking into his partner's big soulful eyes. "I missed you."

Nick brushed his thumb across Greg's cheek, giving him a smile. "I missed you too." He merged their lips together, grinding their naked hips together for the first time. He almost lost it from just the first touch, but he managed to hold on to try it again. He gasped with pleasure as their body's ground against each other, seeing no reason why he couldn't at least try to give him what he wanted.

"Wh... what are you doing?" Greg lay abandoned across the middle of his bed, watching the older man searching through his bed side table. He rummaged through the top drawer, sighing softly with no luck. "Bathroom." His bed mate raised his arm over his head, pointing towards the door. "Cupboard under the sink . . . in that wicker basket thing."

"With the scented candles?" Nick scrambled off the bed, hurrying into the bathroom. He pulled out the basket from under the sink, feeling butterflies in his stomach as he nabbed one of the foil condom packets from the box. He was surprised to see that the box was still full, while the tube of minty fresh lubricant was practically empty. He made his way back to the bedroom with them before he lost his nerve, crawling back under the covers with Greg. "See if I can remember how to do this."

"I got it." Greg gently took the condom packet out of Nick's shaky hands. He bit the corner with his teeth to open it, tossing the wrapped over the side of the bed. He looked into Nick's eyes to make sure he was sure about what he was doing, before he lifted the covers, working the latex across the full length of Nick's manhood. He took the lube off his hands next, being as gentle as he could so he didn't tip him over the edge.

"No one's..." Nick softly bit his bottom lip, looking into the younger man's eyes once he was done. "No one has ever done that to me before."

"Sorry."

"No I mean... it felt amazin'." He smiled, brushing his thumb across Greg's cheek. "I never usually ask this, but how..."

"I can roll over." Greg remembered that he had never been the one on top before. "It kinda sucks because we won't be able to kiss, but it's easier for first timers."

"I'm not a first timer."

"I know." He quickly smiled back at him. "I just mean... it's your first time with me and mine with you. I want you to feel comfortable."

"I have an idea." The man got up his knees, remembering how he felt during his first time. He wanted Greg to feel that same intense pleasure with him, so he thought he'd recreate the moment. He moved the pillows to sit himself against the headboard, ushering Greg towards him to straddle his hips. He held Greg's thighs as he kissed him, feeling that familiar buzz as their body's sparked together. He had to pause kissing him as Greg got into position, fusing their body's together with a burning fire he had never felt before in his life.

"Are you okay?" Greg spoke softly, holding his position a moment. "I can..."

"Do you ever stop talkin'?" The Texan gasped to catch his breath, holding the beautiful body in his arms a little closer as he bucked his hips against him.

Smiling as he watched the pleasure rising to Nick's face, Greg whispered, "I can't talk if you kiss me." He took the hint right away, holding onto Greg's hips to keep up with his rhythm, kissing him between each gasp for breath. He remembered the feeling being very different from the other side, but it felt a lot more intense with Greg in his arms. Every inch of his being was tingling with pleasure already.

He felt in control, protected and most importantly, loved.


	18. Chapter 18 - The Tables Turned

**Chapter Eighteen - The Tables Turned**

Waking up to an obnoxious buzzing sound, Nick rolled away from the warm body in front him, slamming his hand on the snooze button. He rubbed the sleep from his eyes, getting his bearings, before he turned back towards the warmth he had abandoned. He brushed his hand across the beautiful scars that covered his partner's back, pressing his lips to his shoulder. He slid closer to spoon the younger man tightly, feeling his every breath as if it was his own. He wanted to wake him to hear the sound of his voice and let him know that he was still here, but he was too peaceful to disturb.

Nick must have held him for another hour or so, before the alarm went off for the second time. He rolled away from Greg to switch it off, feeling his partner stirring as he rolled back to him. He felt flutters in his stomach as their bare legs brushed against each other, falling even deeper in love with him.

"Mornin', sleepy head." The Texan's delicious voice rasped against his neck.

Greg rolled back into his arms to make sure it was really him, greeting him with a wide smile. "You're still here." He gave out a wide yawn, relaxing back against his pillow.

"I am." Nick brushed his fingers through his bed mates messy hair, adoring his sleepy state. "Did you expect me to leave?"

Lifting his arm over his head, he nestled in closer to the older man, until he could feel the full weight of him on top of him. He had never gone for bulky or toned guys before, mostly because he figured that they were out his league. But Nick had come back to him and the weight on his chest felt amazing. "I was worried that I dreamed the whole thing." He gave him a slight smile, putting his arms around the man's waist. "I'm glad you didn't leave though."

"Can you forgive me?"

"For what?" Greg gave him a curious look.

"For breakin' up with you. For breakin' your heart. For leavin' you." He was sure that there was much more he was guilty of, but that was all he could think of a the moment. "I thought I was savin' you by lettin' you go, but I want to be with you so badly it hurts to think of you with someone else. Turns out the only thing I needed to give me the courage was the thought of losin' you to someone else. I didn't even know if I could..." He nervously smiled at the beautiful man beneath him, moving the covers from between them so he could feel his skin against his own. "But I could definitely do it again."

"Oh, really?" The younger man lifted his thigh against Nick's, pulling his body closer. "How soon are we talking?"

"You got time to brush your teeth?"

"Do I smell?" He covered his hand over his mouth, remembering last night's binge. He didn't feel any of the effects while he was with Nick, but he vaguely remembered Nick holding him upright as he leant over the toilet bowl and threw up. "Oh god," He crawled out from under Nick, feeling a little embarrassed as he made his way through to the bathroom. "First night ever and I completely ruined it." He snatched up his toothbrush, lining it with a big dollop of toothpaste.

"You didn't ruin it." Nick followed him in, slipping his arms around his waist. "You wouldn't have been like that if it wasn't for me." He held him tightly, looking at his reflection in the mirror in front of them. "At least you waited until after we had finished. I think it would have been more embarrassin' durin'." He rested his chin on Greg's shoulder, giving him a wide smile. "You know I have a few hours before I have to go pick up, Sadie from my sister. We can go out for breakfast." He suggested, sliding his hand up the centre of the younger man's chest.

Greg choked on the toothpaste in his mouth, prying the older man's hand from his body. "Tell the truth, you'd rather stay here and jump my bones all day. You know I have a shift at the lab later. I have to get some sleep and I can't be walking around a bunch of CSI's all bow legged."

"Why?" Nick devilishly grinned against his lips. "Take the day off to be with me."

"I've created a monster." He giggled softly, turning back to the sink to finish brushing his teeth. "You know that Grissom knows we're together now, so if I call in sick he's going to assume that it's because I want a personal day to be with you. Warrick would probably fill him in with what happened last night too."

"You never used to worry this much." The Texan leant against the sink beside him.

"I did, actually." Greg rinsed his mouth out, ditching his toothbrush beside the sink. "I'm not as care free as you think I am. I worry about a lot of things." He turned to press his minty lips to Nick's, pulling back with a smile on his face. "I'm gonna shower."

"Is that an open invitation?"

"What do you think?" Backing himself up slowly towards the shower doors, Greg gave him a cheeky grin, waiting for him to follow him in. He turned the water on as Nick joined him inside, feeling his heart racing as the man put his arms around him. He just held him for a moment, looking into his eyes as if he was seeing him for the first time.

When Nick finally started to kiss him, Greg felt his knees buckle. He fell back against the tiled wall behind him, closing his eyes, letting Nick do whatever he wanted to him.

Assaulting his body with kisses, Nick brought him close to the edge multiple times, before he stopped to make him hold on just a little bit longer. He loved watching him lose control. It made him feel powerful.

He held him tightly in his arms as he finally tipped over the edge, looking as though he was a million miles away in some kind of utopian state, but he could still see the soulful look in his eyes that always reeled him in.

Thirty odd minutes later, Greg emerged from the bathroom, running a towel through his hair. He dropped to the edge of his bed, feeling a little exhausted, but it was a pleasantly spent feeling, rather than one of extreme exhaustion. He crashed back against the mattress, smiling as he felt a hand on his thigh.

"More? Aren't you bored of me yet?"

"How could I get bored of my new toy?" The Texan climbed on the bed, straddling his boyfriend's naked hips with his thighs. He sealed a playful kiss to his lips, gently running his fingers through his partner's gorgeous hair. "Are you too tired to play with me already?"

"I am a little tired." Greg admitted, resting his hands on the thighs enveloping his hips. "Are you really here? It's not a dream, is it? Two days ago we were on this bed and you were breaking up with me, now you're here..."

"I'm here." Nick smiled back at him. "It's really happenin'."

"It's unreal." The younger man looked around at his surroundings, making sure it wasn't just a dream. "This is everything that I've always wanted. You actually being here this time makes it feel a little surreal."

"Can you feel this?" Running his fingertip across his partner's stomach, Nick smiled as he watched his eyes rolling back into his skull. He slid his fingertip upwards towards his chest, before he leant down to seal a kiss to his lips. "Do you want to go out for breakfast?" He pressed his chest against Greg's, feeling his heart beating through his skin.

"I think I wonna sleep. It's been a long night."

"Oh... okay." Sitting himself up, Nick gently combed his fingers through his partner's wet hair, giving him a smile. "I love you, Greg." His grin spread wider as he saw the look in the younger man's eyes. It was a look of love that he had never felt from anyone before. "I should probably go then, let you get your rest." He knew he wouldn't be able to keep his hands to himself if he stayed. He climbed off the side of the bed, searching for his clothes among the rubble from last night.

"Phone." Greg pointed it out on the bedside table as it bleeped. He tilted his head to the side to watch Nick grabbing it off the side, judging his expression as he flicked through it. "Your sister?"

"Yeah," Nick glanced over his shoulder, giving him a smile. "I told her to keep me posted. Sadie's up and havin' her breakfast." He hit send to reply to her message, dropping the phone on the bed beside him, freeing his hands to pull his jeans on. "She's happy to look after her for a few more hours, so I don't have to go right away. If you don't want me to."

"You mean, you're not..." Greg dropped his head back, staring up at the ceiling, deciding to keep his mouth shut rather than give into anymore heart ache.

"Hey, what's up?" The Texan fastened his jeans around his waist, leaning against the side of the bed to look into his boyfriend's eyes. "I thought trustin' each other meant that we tell each other everythin'?" He sensed he wasn't telling him something just from the look in his eyes.

"You're not staying with me." He sighed softly. "You're staying with your sister, aren't you?"

"I just think..." Nick crawled closer to him, propping himself up on his elbow beside his head. "That we should take things slow. At least for a little while. Not too slow, because we finally got to the physical stuff." He gently brushed his fingertips down the younger man's arm, looking into his eyes as he finally tilted his head to the side to face him. "I don't wonna hurt you again, but movin' in together now isn't the right thing to do."

"Why not?" He sounded like a spoilt child, but he didn't care because all he wanted was Nick.

"I moved in with you on impulse. I'm not sayin' it was completely a bad idea, but we coulda jeopardised our friendship by doin' somethin' like that so soon. And we almost did. We only just broke up the other day. Most people don't move in together after their first kiss." He moved his hand to rest on Greg's stomach, admiring the beautiful body laid out in front of him. "I'm not sayin' never again, I'm just sayin' that we should try out the regular datin' thing for a while. You know instead of eatin', sleepin' and spendin' every wakin' moment of our day together. Not that it's a bad thing, but it might be nice to try out datin' each other rather than just bein' roommates."

"I guess." The younger man spoke softly, prying the man's hand off his chest. "You should probably go now then. I need to catch up on my sleep for work." He pulled the towel out from under him, tossing it over the side of the bed, before he crawled towards his pillows. He was hoping that Nick would leave him to it, but the man decided to lay down beside him instead. "Why are you still here?"

"Because I don't want to leave if you're still mad at me." Nick reached for the covers behind him, pulling them over them both. "I only just got you back."

"You're really annoying, you know that?"

"I know." Nick slid his arms around him. "But you still love me though."

"I do."

Nick smiled back at him, holding him closer. "You know that I love you too, right? I don't think I've actually said it to your face, not while you were awake anyway." He confessed. "But I know I love you in my heart. It wouldn't hurt so much if I didn't. I love the way you look at me the most." He brushed his fingertips down the side of Greg's face, looking into his eyes. "I love your smile, the way you laugh and your tendency to over explain things. You think it's annoyin', but I think it's adorable. The daily phone calls to your mother are annoyin' because you talk to her about me as if I'm not even in the room, but I'd never want to break the bond that you have. I don't like how you clip your toenails in bed. Or how you constantly try to talk me out of doin' somethin' after you just talked me up to it." He grinned against his lips. "But I think I could learn to live with some of your other habits."

"You could?" Greg thought he had plenty of annoying habits that could turn away potential boyfriends, but he could easily change just the one bad habit that got on his nerves. "I don't think I would change a thing about you. Except for the constant feeling of taking one step forwards, then about five steps back with you. I've already learnt all your habits working with you and they only made me love you even more."

"What kind of habits?" He queried, only getting a smile out of Greg. "What?"

"I'm not saying a word. The last time I opened my mouth about our relationship, you moved out and I ended up heartbroken and hitting on a man who wanted me to strip tease for him in front of his wife. He thought I was a male escort."

Nick chuckled softly, playfully ruffling his fingers through his bed mate's hair. "You shoulda done it. Charged him a fortune while you were at it." He teased, slipping his arms around his waist again. "I'm glad you didn't though. You don't have to be afraid to tell me anythin' now. I broke up with you because I thought I'd never get over the intimacy thing. I thought it was better to let you go, but I missed you and I know I can now, so I won't be doin' it again. Breakin' up with you." He quickly clarified. "And it doesn't feel like one step forwards, five steps back. Does it?"

"Sometimes." Greg shrugged his shoulders together. "So you think all our troubles are over because you finally popped your cherry?"

"Don't cheapen the moment." Nick playfully jabbed his sides. "No, I don't think all our troubles are over. But we have a reason to work at our relationship now. I thought I was trappin' you before in a one sided relationship because you'd never get what you wanted from me. I know I'm not completely cured because I was terrified when we... but I didn't have a panic attack and I didn't want it to stop. I wanted you to have the relationship that you deserved, but now I want to be the man that you deserve."

"And you say I over explain things." Greg smiled back at him, rolling his head back against his pillow. "Okay I'm in. The relationship dating thing, I'll give it a go. But we never exactly had time to date while you were living here, so how do you plan on finding the time if we're living our own separate lives?"

"Because I love you, so I'll make time. My sister can help out with Sadie more for a while. You work at nights, so you're pretty much home while I'm awake. And I know your parents' big weddin' anniversary is comin' up soon, so you're gonna need a date to that."

"It's in four months. My Mom always sends invitations out way too early. I think she does it so you have no excuse to avoid it. And I was planning on telling her that something came up at work, so I didn't have to go."

"C'mon, you can't avoid it." Nick tickled his fingertips across Greg's hip. "It's their weddin' anniversary. They're your parents and they completely adore you. They'd do anythin' for you. So it is a big deal and it's a romantic settin'. We can go together. We could dance. Can you dance?"

"With another person to romantic music?" Greg shook his head. "Not since my prom night. I didn't actually go to my Highschool prom. My Highschool prom night consisted of my Nana and Papa Olaf teaching me how to dance in the living room, while my folks were out."

"You never went to prom?" Nick found that a little upsetting. "Why not?"

"I didn't want to. I think during my whole life, I've only ever been to one school dance and I was about ten or something. The girls all stood over one side of the hall and the boys over the other. It was dull and no one really wanted to be there, their parents had just made them so they could get a free night off. Besides, if I went I would have just been sitting by myself in the corner of the room for the whole night. I was the unpopular kid with full head gear and braces around that time."

"I've seen pictures of you as a teen." The older man brushed his thumb across his partner's chin. "You were cute."

Greg giggled softly, shaking his head. "I had my Mom hide all the pictures of me in head gear. Trust me, you wouldn't have wanted to come near me."

"We have to go then. I'll be your first dance." He slid his hand into Greg's, weaving their fingers together at his side. "I love dancin'. I can't believe we haven't gone yet. We'll have to make it our next date to get some practice in." He pressed their bodies together, giving the younger man a smile as he leant in for a kiss. He brushed his thumb across the younger man's five o' clock shadow as he kissed him, wishing it would grow under his thumb. He had always liked the feel of a man's lightly stubbled jaw line, but Greg had always been so clean shaven. "Have you ever tried to grow it out?"

"What?" Greg gave him a confused look.

"A beard. Have you tried to grow it out?" He brushed his fingertips across his smooth jaw line, trying to picture him with one.

"Sort of. I end up with patches all over my chin as it grows though. My Mom said it looks like I have mange." He smiled as Nick continued to stroke his jaw. "Is that your thing then? You like hairy guys?"

"Not hair all over. Just the jaw." Nick shook his head, placing his hand on the younger man's smooth chest. "It's kind of a fetish thing, I guess. Like your thing for guys with accents. When I was fourteen, I remember my brother had this sleepover with all his friends. One of his friends had this gorgeously stubbled jaw line that just made him stand out from the others. I could imagine myself kissin' him and after that all my fantasies practically had a guy with facial hair in them. My first kiss was with a boy who had stubble on his chin, so it's just kinda been my thing."

"I guess I should be grateful that you don't have a weird foot fetish or the desire to be diapered." He gave him a quirky look to make sure that he didn't, bursting into a grin as the man blushed a little. "I get it, the thing for facial hair. It's like the most manly element of being with a guy. When you're kissing him you get that Daddy rash on your face." He remembered his own short encounter with a bearded boyfriend.

"Could you grow it out?" Nick continued to stroke his chin with his thumb. "Just so I can see you with one. Unless you don't like it. I noticed you practically shave every part of your body, except your legs."

"It's the twink look. I don't get hair on my back or chest though, so I've never had to shave there."

"Twink?" Nick gave him a perplexed look.

"You know, the boyish appearance. Slim to average build, practically no body hair. Kinda like a teen or guy in his early twenties. I think I can still pull it off in my thirties." He caught a smile spreading across his partner's lips. "Besides, I've kinda gotten used to the no hair down there. You should try it. Everything feels way more sensitive down there since I started shaving my balls. Some guys like that sorta thing. You've never heard the term twink before?"

"No. Is that what I like then if I like you?"

"I guess." Greg shrugged his shoulders together. "You don't have to like one specific thing. I've always fallen for the guy more than their body type. Their body's just a bonus. Although it does kinda make things... you know, more pleasurable down there with no hair."

"I'll make you a deal." Nick slid his arms around his waist, holding him close. "You grow your beard out a little and I'll shave my... area. Deal?"

"Your... area." Greg couldn't help but smile. "You're such a prude. Deal. And I wonna see the goods tonight before I go to work."

"You want me to shave my balls at my sister's place? Gross, Greg."

"You can do it here." Greg crawled out from his arms, holding onto Nick's hand as he slid off the bed. "I can do it for you. C'mon," He gave him a slight tug, letting him stand up straight before he gently pulled him in the direction of the bathroom. "It's quick and painless. I've done myself often enough." He turned to face the man in the bathroom. "Do you trust me?"

"With my life." Nick gulped softly as he stopped in the middle of the bathroom, watching Greg grabbing a towel to lay on the floor in front of him. He then scrambled over to the cupboard under the sink, pulling out some electric clippers. "Is it goin' to hurt?"

"Shouldn't do, unless I somehow accidentally manage to castrate you." He couldn't help but tease the man, shaking his head as he knelt down in front of him. "Relax, it won't hurt a bit. Hold still." He turned on the clippers, smiling as Nick anxiously bit his lip, looking away from what was happening between his legs. He glanced down once it was over, not feeling any different, but there was quite a few clumps of hair on the towel in front of him. "Voila." Greg climbed to his feet, sealing a kiss to his partner's lips. "You might want to avoid tight pants or sex for a little while. It chaffs a little at first."

"No sex. Why did I ever agree to this?" He smiled against Greg's lips, pulling him in for another kiss. "Does this mean you're not mad at me anymore?"

"I think I'd of at least tried to clip you a little if I was mad." Greg set the clippers aside, running his fingers through his hair. "I get what you're saying. I just don't want to spend more time away from you or Sadie. I felt like I had a family a few days ago, now I'm just a lonely bachelor again."

"You're not a bachelor and you're not alone. You have me. And Sadie." He added, putting his arms around the younger man's waist. "You can see her whenever you like. Because we 'are' a family. I just don't want to hurt you again. Workin' jobs like ours, we learn to live with the fact that life is short and we can't take anythin' for granted. I never want to take you for granted, but I kinda want a normal-ish relationship. I want to date you for as long as I can before we get to all the serious heart breakin' stuff."

"You think there's gonna more heart break?"

Lifting Greg's hands into his own, Nick gently swayed their bodies together, looking into the younger man's soulful eyes. "No one has a happily ever after forever. But I want ours to last for as long as possible."

* * *

 **Thank you for reading. I'll try and upload the last two chapters within the next week or so, before I can get started on correcting the sequel. If you're enjoying the story so far, please review. Thank you, Marymel for all your reviews.**

 **Merry Christmas All.**

 **~ Holly**


	19. Chapter 19 - Forever Deal

**Chapter Nineteen - Forever Deal**

"Picture a long walkway right here. With large pillars at the foot of the steps, decorated with red roses with petals scattered across the grass. We'll have one of those big tent things right here with all the tables and chairs facing towards that end of the garden where our table will be set up." His mother continued on down the garden path, explaining the table decorations, while Greg pulled his phone out of his pocket to check for any messages again. He sighed as he followed his mother towards the end of the garden, looking at her as she rambled on about the possible water feature or statue that she was planning as a centre piece for her wedding anniversary dinner. "And over here, we're going to have naked belly dancers."

"Huh?" Greg frowned in her direction. "Naked belly dancers?"

"Oh so you are actually listening to me then? You have that same look on your face that you used to get when you just zone me out." She made her way over to him, playfully rubbing her hands across his shoulders. "What is going on in that head of yours today? You're supposed to be helping me with all of this, not zoning me out. We have less than a week of prep now."

"I'm sorry." He stuffed his phone back into his pocket. "But I'm not sitting at the front on display to everyone. Certainly not in front of a huge cherub statue."

"What's wrong with a cherub statue?"

"They look stupid." Greg motioned over his shoulder towards the steps. "And pillars, roses and a huge tent. It's like you're trying to recreate your wedding pictures." He had seen them plenty of times, so he recognised the theme right away. "Wedding anniversaries are supposed to be a whole new celebration, not the same princess fairytale thing again. And red as your theme colour is completely wrong. It doesn't even go with your complexion. You need gold, black, silver. And a slideshow of the last thirty years is completely tacky. You're better off just blowing up a few pictures in black and white to decorate your tent with them, rather than subjecting your guests to an hour long slideshow of pictures."

"Ooh... someone's in a bad mood." Jean jotted a few of his ideas down on the notepad she had in her hands, before she followed him towards the house. "Has Nick broken up with you again? Is that what's got you in such a bad mood?"

"No, why does everybody always assume that he broke up with me?" Greg went straight for the fridge, grabbing a bottle of water from the door. "My relationship is perfectly fine, thank you."

"Well I have to say that your impression of someone who is perfectly fine is coming along nicely." His mother sarcastically remarked, ditching her notebook on the counter. "C'mon then, tell your mother all your problems." She took a seat on one of the stools. "You're no use to me if you're in a mood, even if you do come up with some pretty good ideas during a rant."

"Pretty good? My ideas ruled and you know it." He managed a smile back at her, taking his seat the other side of the counter. "I haven't seen Nick in two days and now he's ignoring my texts. He knew I was coming down here over the weekend and he said he'd let me know if he was coming, but he's just gone completely radio silent instead."

"It doesn't mean anything. The man has a ten month old baby to look after." His mother tried to give him a reassuring smile, reaching her hand out to his chin. "Is your razor broken or something?" She smirked, brushing her hand across the stubble on his chin. "Are you going through a beard faze like your father?"

"Dad grew a moustache." He reminded her, leaning back in his seat so she couldn't reach him anymore. "This is a five o' clock shadow beard and I kinda like it."

"You're forgetting that hillbilly beard that your father tried to grow out."

"It was called a chin curtain." The man defended himself, joining them in the kitchen after overhearing them from his office down the hall. "And your Nana thought I looked pretty dapper with it. Like a young Abraham Lincoln." He remembered her exact comments, finding himself something to eat in the fridge.

"It gave me a terrible rash." Jean rubbed her chin at the memory. "You better shave it before next week." She warned her son, pushing herself to her feet. "I can make you something if you're hungry, Daniel. My Mom won't be here until this afternoon, so we can eat before she gets here."

"Okay." Daniel stepped aside, letting his wife get to the fridge. "I think it looks good." He complimented his son. "It makes you look a little older."

"Thanks." Greg brushed his thumb across his chin, starting to get used to the feeling, but he still missed his baby smooth skin. "And I'm not shaving it. I'm in my thirties. You can't tell me what to do anymore." He pushed himself to his feet, giving his mother a smile. "I'm gonna go get some sleep."

"It's barely eleven." His mother glanced at her watch.

"I've been up since five yesterday working, before I drove down here to help you." He pointed out to her, making his way towards the door. "And Mom, balloons as table decorations makes you feel like you're at a little kids party. Flowers or candles work much better. Just not too big or you can't see who you're talking to."

"I love having a gay son." She gushed with pride. "It's a shame he wasn't around during the prep for our wedding."

"I was two and a half on your wedding day." Greg reminded his mother. "Nana told me you tried to pass me off as your baby brother in your white dress. You didn't tell most of your family that I was your son until after the speeches at dinner."

"It wasn't because we were ashamed of having you so young. It was your father's family mostly. His mother had this strict rule about no sex before marriage. But we already had a baby. We had already been together since Highschool, so I was surprised she didn't figure it out until you were nearly three, especially since I was round there practically every day. Even with my pregnant belly once, but she was just so naive she chose not notice. And Daniel didn't want to tell her for fear of breaking her heart, so we waited until we were married before we actually said anything."

"She didn't speak to me for a while after that." Daniel leant back against the counter, keeping out of his wife's way as she started the prep for an omelette. "She spoke to your mother though. She always thought that Jean would be the one to get me into trouble, but after she found out about you, she thought I was the bad guy."

"I managed to convince her that it was partly my idea too though. I think she forgave us eventually." His mother set up an extra plate for him, ushering him back to the counter to sit by his father. She served up half the omelette each, handing them some cutlery as they took their seats. "She adored you which softened the blow a little."

"I don't really remember her." Greg took his seat next to his father, not really feeling that hungry, but he couldn't actually remember the last time he ate something.

"She died when you were seven." Daniel remembered, smiling at his wife as she tapped him on the shoulder. "She was quite a bit older than Nana Olaf. She didn't remember half of us towards the end. But she loved her visits with you." He glanced round as he heard a car pulling up, watching his son springing to his feet a second later.

His son hurried past the window with a wide smile on his face, rushing to greet the handsome driver of the truck.

"Don't stare, Jean." Daniel warned his wife.

"I'm not." The woman hid beside the window, watching her son and the older man embracing in a loving hug. "I'm just looking. Looks like this boyfriend is a little more serious than all the others, so I'm just making sure that he's good enough for our boy."

"You already offered the man money to buy a house." He finally let onto her that Greg had told him about that. "You must think he's pretty amazing if you've already done that."

"Well he's a family man. Exactly the kind of man that Greg used to avoid, which means he's perfect. We don't even have to worry about never having grandchildren now as he already has one." She spied the man lifting his daughter out of the back, finally stepping away from the window to greet him inside. "Hello, Nick."

"Hi, Mrs Sanders." The Texan handed his daughter over to Greg, leaving his hands free to grab the bags. "I hope it's okay us bein' here."

"Are you kidding? You're practically family already. It would be wrong not to have you here." The woman smiled at her son, taking one of the bags for him. "I've still got Greg's old crib set up in the guest bedroom. Greg can get you settled in. Would you like something to eat?"

"He can have the rest of mine." Greg led the way inside with Sadie, gently tugging the pacifier out of her mouth as they approached the kitchen. She pointed her little finger up towards the ceiling fan, before her little eyes turned towards Daniel in the kitchen.

"Da." She motioned towards the man.

"That's my Daddy." He adjusted her against his side, giving his father a smile as the baby continued to observe him while he ate. "She's started eating solids now. Porridge, bananas, water melon and mashed sweet potato are her favourites at the moment. Nick keeps trying to feed her carrots or fruit, but she's not interested in them."

"You were a very picky eater when you were a baby." Daniel remembered, smiling at the memory of his wife trying to find something that he actually would eat. "You were the only one that didn't like your mother's cooking and it drove her crazy trying to find something that you did actually like." He cleared away his finished plate, making his way towards the door to help Nick with the bags and the questions from his wife.

"No, I went the other way. It was a little longer, but we still made good time." Nick smiled in relief as Daniel appeared at the doorway, taking the baby carrier off his hands. It wasn't that he didn't like Greg's mother, she just was a bit full on all the time, wanting to know everything and she barely gave him enough time to answer before she was onto the next question. "Hi, Mr Sanders."

"Hi, Nick." Daniel grabbed the other bag from his hands, ushering his wife away to at least let the young man inside the house before she jumped at him with questions. "Sadie looks good. How old is she now?"

"Ten months." Nick set her bag at the foot of the stairs. "She doesn't actually travel light though, even for a weekend."

"Baby's never do." Daniel closed the door behind them, leading him through to the kitchen where Greg was sat with his daughter. "I'm taking your Mom out to burn a hole in my pocket again." He grabbed his jacket, checking his wallet was still inside his pocket. "We'll be back before Nana gets here."

"Okay." Greg tapped the seat beside him, letting Nick finish off the rest of his omelette. "Hey Dad, no red." He called after him, giving his mother a smile as she pulled her shoes on. "It won't go with your colour scheme."

"Goodbye, dear. Get Nick settled in." His mother warned him, waving goodbye to them both.

"Bye." Nick turned to wave to them, trying to keep in a mouthful of eggs. He turned back to look at Greg, wiping the ketchup from his lips as he swallowed down another bite. "I got your message right before my phone died. It's on charge in my truck. You must have already left when I called you from my sister's, so I just made my own way down here."

"My CSI brain figured that one out when I saw the worry in your eyes." Greg smiled back at him, letting Sadie fiddle with the strap of his watch. "I admit that I did think you were ignoring me at first, but all was forgiven the second I saw you. So relax, you're off the hook."

"Good." Nick immediately leant forwards, sealing his lips to his partner's. "Mmm, I've missed you." He stole another kiss, before he grabbed another forkful of omelette from the plate in front of him. "Must have been a big case you were workin'. Have you even slept yet?"

"I got about two hours before I drove here. I was just about to get some sleep now before you showed up. I'm okay though." He gave him a reassuring smile, hugging Sadie against his chest. "I miss you too."

"She's crawlin' now. Yesterday at my sister's she was layin' on her tummy. She did that mini push up thing she's been doin' for a while, before she started using her knees to push herself forwards. She hasn't done it since, but we're gonna have to start baby proofin' my sister's and yours for when she does." Nick finished off the plate in front of him, noticing the look in the younger man's eyes. "What? What did I say wrong this time?"

"You know we wouldn't miss each other so much if you would just move back in with me."

"I thought we agreed on this?"

"No, you agreed on your pointless decision, whereas I objected and gave up arguing." Greg leant forwards to steal a kiss from his lips, before he lifted Sadie into her father's arms. "I gave up because I love you too much to argue with you all the time. Do you want me to show you where your room is?"

"I remember the way." He reached out for his partner's hand, pulling him towards him. "I don't want us to fight about this all the time."

"So we won't." Greg gently brushed his fingers through his boyfriend's hair, pressing his lips to his forehead. "We'll just continue to live our separate lives and pretend that there's nothing more going on here, because you don't really love me."

"Don't do that." He hooked his arm around him, holding him close against his chest. "Would you really want me to move in with you right after you've said somethin' like that? I do love you, even though you drive me crazy. But now isn't the time for us to be movin' in with each other again." He captured his lips for a slow kiss, feeling the younger man's heart pounding through his chest. "I want to... eventually." He spoke softly, brushing his thumb across the stubble on Greg's chin. "When we do, it'll be when we're both ready. We can get a house, like we talked about. One we both like. For the three of us."

"Do you see that dream happening any time soon?"

Nick smiled against his lips, pressing a kiss to his prickled chin. "We'll see. Go get some sleep. We can find our own way around until your folks get back. I love you." He whispered softly, nipping a kiss to his jaw line. "Do you want me to tuck you in?"

"Yes, please." Greg pulled out of his arms, leading the way towards the stairs. He picked up Nick's duffel and Sadie's suitcase, carrying them up the stairs with him. He pushed the guest bedroom door open with his elbow, ditching the bags inside, before he made a beeline towards his own room. He pulled his sneakers off as he dropped to the end of the bed, crawling back on his elbows as Nick appeared in the doorway. He had strapped Sadie back into the baby carrier, sitting her by the doorway for a moment.

He grabbed the blanket from the end of the bed, unravelling it across the younger man's body, before he lay himself down beside him. It was only a singlebed, but he managed to squeeze in to be close to him for a moment. He lifted Greg's hand from his side, weaving their fingers together as he looked into his eyes.

"Do you really think that I don't love you?"

Greg shook his head slightly, holding Nick's hand close against his chest. "You'll come to realise that I have relationship issues. My last boyfriend cheated on me regularly and I was too dumb to realise it until I found him in bed with someone else. I've never had any kind of future with anyone, so I'm sorry if I freak out a little."

"I don't mind if you freak out. It just bugs me when you always think that I don't love you. The two days of not seein' you was torture for me too, but you had to work." He inched a little closer, brushing his lips across Greg's. "I changed my whole life to be with you. Not because you forced me into it, but because I wanted to be with you. I've fallen in love with you these past few months, but I think a part of me always thought you were somethin' special before you ever kissed me. That sounds like a line, but it's the truth. I never thought about being with you then, but I'm glad I am now. Just because I don't want to move in with you now, it doesn't mean that I don't love you. And it hurts when you say stuff like that."

"I'm sorry." Greg breathed across his lips, enticing the older man into a kiss. He felt his body automatically responding to his every touch, but Nick decided to pull back before it got too intense. "Oh that not in my parents' house rule?" He remembered, sighing softly as he rolled away from him. "Typical."

"It's disrespectful to your folks. I know your mother taught you manners. Besides, you're tired. And I know you'd never break that rule either, that's why you came to sleep in here instead of the guest room with me." Nick sealed one last kiss to his lips, before he slid off the bed. "Get some sleep, I'll see you later." He made his way over to the window to close the curtains, giving Greg a smile as he made his way towards the door. "I love you, G."

Greg smiled back at the man, rolling over onto his side to finally get some sleep. He slept straight through the afternoon, giving Nick some time to unpack and explore the house again, before Greg's parents arrived home. Jean talked him through her anniversary dinner plans, getting his own opinion on the colour scheme, getting some insight into his own parents' fortieth anniversary that he went to a few years ago.

When he finally emerged from his bedroom, Greg rushed straight for the bathroom, barely making it to the toilet before he threw up. He held his stomach as he wretched up the last of the fluids, trying to remember the last thing he ate. He skipped any meals while he was working, making the first meal he ate the omelette that his boyfriend ate most of. He hadn't been drinking a whole lot lately, but he still felt sick even after his stomach was empty.

Greg rinsed his mouth out at the sink, grabbing his toothbrush off the side to freshen up, before he made his way downstairs. He smiled as he approached the living room door way, watching Sadie crawling about on all fours as if she had been doing it for years. She gave out an adorable squeal as she made it to another toy, batting it away with her hand, so she could make the adventurous crawl over to it again.

"She really can crawl." He stepped into the room, smiling at her gorgeous father sat on the floor. "Did you put it in her baby book?"

"That memory book thing?" Nick shook his head slightly. "I kinda lost it when I moved in with my sister. I know it's there somewhere and I have copies of most of the pictures I put it in."

Greg smiled softly, kneeling down in front him. He leant forwards to seal a kiss to his lips, before he wrapped his arms around his shoulders to hug him tightly.

"What was that for?" He gently stroked his hand up and down Greg's back, gently weaving his fingers through his partner's hair as he continued to hold onto him. He tilted his head to the side, keeping an eye on Sadie as she crawled towards the other side of the room. "Bad dreams?" He pressed his lips to the younger man's forehead, gently smoothing his hand up and down his back.

"No... good dreams." Greg lifted his head, giving him a smile. "Has my Mom been annoying you?"

"No, she's been alright. She showed me the setup for her anniversary dinner then she and your Nana started on the flower arrangements, so I came in here with Sadie. Your Dad keeps comin' in to check on us."

"He used to do that when I was a kid. Wherever I was in the house, he'd always find me, poke his head around the door and ask if I was okay at least once an hour. He worries more than my Mom, he just doesn't talk about it as much as she does." Greg turned to sit back against the sofa behind him, reaching his arms out as Sadie came crawling in his direction.

"I think he checked on you while you were sleepin' too." Nick remembered bumping into the man as they both went to check on Greg. "Did you sleep okay? You look like you've been tossin' and turnin'." He playfully ruffled his fingers through his tousled hair, thinking he looked completely adorable.

"Yeah, I slept okay. I think I might be coming down with something though." He wiped his forehead, still feeling a little queasy. "Maybe it's just the toll of working a double shift with no food or sleep."

"Do you want me to get you somethin' to eat?"

"I don't think my stomach can handle solids at the moment." Greg shook his head, smiling at the baby as she crawled right past him to grab another toy. "I'll grab something later."

"We can book an appointment with your doc when we get back to Vegas. No arguments." He gave him a stern warning as the younger man looked round at him. "You've been sick longer than the two days you were workin' a double shift. It probably didn't help, but you were off your food when I took you out to dinner too. Besides, I don't want you gettin' sick a week before your folks anniversary. I wonna dance with you."

"You still wonna be my date in a room full of people?"

"I do." The Texan gave him a reassuring smile, crawling across the floor after Sadie, before she reached the fire place. He steered her in the opposite direction, watching her pulling herself up against Greg's knee. "She's gonna be walkin' in no time." He realised, moving himself closer to Greg. "I may have been a little hasty suggestin' that we won't be movin' in together soon. I see your Mom and Dad's relationship and I want that with you. Your Mom says I remind her of Daniel and you're just like your Mom, so I think we'll be okay."

"More than okay I'd say." Greg slid forwards, capturing his lips for a kiss.

"So..." Nick placed his hand on Greg's knee, looking into his eyes. "When we get back home, I think we should start lookin' at places. You know for the three of us." He crawled after his daughter again, stopping her from climbing into the basket full of old newspapers. "My sister's place is full of kids and their dog, so I can't exactly leave her to explore on the floor. Your apartment is a virtual death trap. And I want a house..." He let her out of his arms to crawl towards Greg, giving the younger man a wide smile. "With you. Like we planned before."

"It's not too soon for you?" He wondered how long he had been asleep for Nick to decide that, making him worry that his mother had talked him into it.

"Sadie's about turn to be a year old. And your Mom asked me today why I'm breakin' up with you. I don't think it's too soon if we both love each other."

"Sorry." Greg gritted his teeth together, holding onto Sadie's hands as she tried to climb to her feet against him. "I didn't say anything to her."

"You told her that I moved out though. And it does seem kind of dumb." He gently combed his fingers through his daughter's short hair, smiling as he turned to look at Greg. "I keep thinkin' that what I'm doin' is the right thing... but it never really turns out how I plan. Breakin' up with you was supposed to save you from bein' trapped with me. But I loved you too much to leave you heartbroken. Stayin' away from you was hard, but I wanted a normal relationship. I thought that if we lived separately it would somehow make us stronger, but I miss you and I hate livin' with Gwen. She tries to mother me all the time. It's not like livin' with you. I don't even want to live on my own again."

"You're a very complicated man, Mr Stokes." Greg lifted the baby against his chest, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "Are you sure this time? I'm starting to figure out that you actually have no idea what you want, do you?" He smirked, patting Sadie on the back before she wriggled too much that he had to let her down to explore again.

"I want you. I know that. It's the only thing I've really been sure of since you first kissed me. I thought I knew what I wanted before then, but you've kinda turned all that upside down. In a good way though." He assured him, leaning slightly closer to the younger man. "I love you, more than I ever thought it possible to love another person. Besides Sadie of course." He quickly added, getting a smile out of Greg. "Without tryin' to sound like a fairytale prince, I want the rest of my life to be with you. I want us to have a house of memories with our family and plannin' our own anniversary or somethin' together."

The younger man grinned widely, feeling his heart fluttering in his chest. "Are you proposing to me?"

"It sounded like it, didn't it." Nick smirked, reaching out for his hand at his side. "Would that be such a bad thing though?"

"It depends on whether you're going to retract it in a few hours time. Less than a few hours ago, we were arguing over you moving back in with me again. When I wake up, you're ready to buy a house and plan an entire future with me. Did my Mom brain wash you while I was out?"

"No." He smiled back at him. "Sadie did a lot of the convincin' actually. Your Mom was showin' me some pictures of her weddin' day. She pointed out you in your Nana's arms in one of the pictures and Sadie said 'papa'. She's never said that before. She's only ever said 'da' in reference to you."

"That's all it took?"

"She's growin' up so fast. She's crawlin' and tryin' to walk in the same day." He motioned towards her as she pulled herself up against the coffee table. She couldn't quite manage the walking thing at the moment, but she seemed very steady on her legs. "She's gonna be talkin' soon and I don't want her askin' all the questions that I can't answer. Like why her Papa doesn't even live with us. Why we have to stay with my sister or why we can't see her grandparents."

"So are you proposing to me for your benefit or for hers?"

Nick gritted his teeth together, confessing, "A little of both. Does that bother you?"

"Not so much." Greg shook his head, slipping his arms around the older man's shoulders. "But I'm not ready to marry you right away. I love you, but it's a little sudden, even for me. We can start slow with house hunting. I'll promise not to freak out anymore about our relationship and you have to promise not to make any more decisions on your own." He grinned against his lips. "They're not exactly your strong suit."

"Deal. No more decision makin'." Nick closed the gap between them, sealing the deal with a kiss. He slid his arm around Greg's waist to hold him closer, not noticing the younger man's father at the door, stopping by to check on them again.

Daniel had avoided any previous talk about his son's boyfriends or relationships, but now it was right there in front of him. He tried to convince himself that it was just a phase Greg was going through at first, but he could see now that it was real. His son was completely in love with this older man. He had finally found the happiness that he had found with his own wife.

* * *

 **Thank you for reading! One more chapter to go. Please review.**

 **~ Holly**


	20. Chapter 20 - All in Good Time

**Chapter Twenty - All in Good Time**

"To Daniel and Jean, thirty years." The guests raised their expensive champagne glasses in the happy couples direction, toasting them to the finished speech of Daniel's older brother, Mark. The third and final speech of the night. Jean took a quick sip of her champagne, pressing a kiss to her husband's cheek as she pushed herself to her feet. Before anyone else decided to jump up for an unscheduled speech of their own, Jean finally made her trip to the bathroom. She hurried towards the downstairs bathroom, giving the door a light knock to make sure no one was in there, before she slipped inside.

"Mom." Greg tapped his knuckles on the door, holding his stomach as he leant against the frame.

"I literally just got in here." She called back to him, finally sitting down to pee. She didn't realise she would drink so much, but with all the speeches and everyone congratulating her and husband on thirty years, her champagne glass just seemed to keep topping itself up. She straightened up the guest towels and things once she was done, pulling the door open to her son. "What's the big emergency?"

Greg pushed past her, only making it to the sink before he threw up. He thought after a week or so his stomach would start to settle, but he still felt nauseous all day, unable to keep any food down.

"Too much champagne?" His mother closed the door, fetching him a fresh wash cloth. "You know you can't hold your liquor, sweetheart. I know we're celebrating, but you don't have to go all out."

"I..." Greg shook his head. "I haven't had a drop. Ask Nick, I've only... had water." He sat himself on the closed lid of the toilet, feeling cold sweats shivering down his arms. He felt a little faint, but he didn't want to lie down in case he threw up again. He glanced up as his mother presented him with a glass of water, kneeling down in front of him. "I'm sorry I ruined your day."

"You haven't ruined anything. Are you sick?" She instinctively placed her hand on his forehead, checking his temperature. "You don't feel feverish."

"It's not a fever. I don't know what it is." He shrugged his shoulders together, taking the glass off her hands. "My doctor doesn't think it's anything serious. I went last week." He assured her. "I'm still waiting on the blood test results. He's gonna text them to me as soon as he gets them back from his lab."

"You should go to bed. You look awful. Go on, I'll bring you up some hot soup or something." Jean pulled her son to his feet, taking him towards the bottom of the stairs. "Go, I'll be back in a few minutes. I just have to find your father before he starts to worry about me. Go." She ushered him away, making sure he actually started up the stairs, before she returned to her party outside.

Greg clambered the stairs to his room, kicking his shoes off at the doorway. He pulled off his suit jacket, collapsing back against the bed. He didn't feel sleepy, but it was nice to finally lay down. He could still hear the laughter and chatter of the guests outside, recognising Nick's voice in the crowd. He told him he'd be right back, leaving him talking to one of his uncles. He managed to convince his mother not to put them on display at the front table where she was sat, but that meant making awkward small talk with his homophobic uncle. He wanted to get up to rescue Nick from any topic of conversation with that man, but he couldn't will his legs to move once he was comfortable.

A few minutes later, he felt the mattress shift beneath him. He cracked one eye open a little, smiling as he spotted his partner crawling towards him. "Your Mom said you weren't feelin' very well." Nick lay down beside him, touching his fingertips to Greg's forehead. "Is it still that stomach flu thing you had last week? We have to take you to the doctor when we get home."

"I went already." Greg adjusted himself on the bed. "My doc said I'm fine."

"Then we need a second opinion. It's been a week already. We're lookin' at houses tomorrow." He reminded him, gently placing his hand on the younger man's stomach. "I don't want you gettin' sick."

"It comes and goes. I wasn't sick at all yesterday."

"That's because you didn't eat a thing. What if I gave you somethin'?" He feared, holding his partner a little closer. "I haven't been tested since last year. You and I have only just started... I could have given you somethin'. I could be the reason you're sick now."

"You didn't. So don't drive yourself crazy with that theory. I don't even have the right symptoms for something like that. I just can't keep any food down." Crawling towards the headboard, Greg propped up a pillow behind him, holding his stomach as Nick took a seat beside him. He let Nick gently rub his stomach, listening to the party going on outside. "Do you think we'll ever make it to thirty years?"

"I'll be sixty somethin' by then." Nick realised, giving his partner a slight nod. "I think we'll make it. We could have a couple of grandchildren by then. I see you as a college professor or maybe a lab supervisor like Grissom."

"What about you?"

The Texan shrugged his shoulders together, glancing towards the door as he heard a knock. He scrambled off the bed to answer it, thanking Jean as he took the soup off her hands. He assured her that he was taking good care of her son, before he returned to Greg on the bed. "How does your mother manage to make up some soup with a hundred guests outside?"

"She freezes them. Check the freezer next time you go down there. She loves making soups. She has a freezer full of every type of soup you'd ever want. I only just threw up though." Greg shook his head, letting Nick set it down on the bedside table instead. "Where's Sadie anyway?"

"Your Nana Olaf has her. She was gonna hold her while I asked you to dance, but you disappeared before I could."

"Sorry." Greg gave him a slight smile, actually a little relieved that he didn't have to get up and dance in front of his whole family. "You'd probably be grateful if you saw me dance though."

"You're not gettin' out of it that easily." The Texan chuckled softly. "Sadie will be alright with her for a while. She was asleep last time I checked on her." Nick perched himself on the bed beside him, placing his hand over the younger man's stomach again. "You look really cute with your smart hairdo."

"Mom wanted me to shave this." He brushed his thumb across the stubble on his chin. "I compromised with a smart hairstyle instead."

"I like it." He smoothed his hand across his stomach, checking the temperature of his forehead with the back of his hand. He still didn't feel feverish, only making him worry even more. At least when Sadie was in hospital, they detected a fever right away to treat the symptoms of her meningitis. Greg's doctor still couldn't find what was wrong with him, putting him right back in that state of worry that he felt when his daughter was still in hospital. "I can't lose you, G. If somethin' is wrong, you'd tell me wouldn't you?"

"I would. But it's nothing. Since when is feeling a little sick now and then considered something serious?"

"When the man I love isn't eatin' anythin'," Nick lifted his hand from his side, weaving their fingers together. "You can't live on nothin'." He glanced round as he heard a beeping sound, letting Greg up to grab his phone off the bedside table. "Who is it?"

Greg sunk back against the pillow beside his partner, scrolling through the message, before he handed it over to his boyfriend. "Just my doc. The lab screwed up my blood results. He's gonna run them again, which means I won't get the results back until Monday." He took his phone back from his concerned boyfriend once he was done reading it, sitting himself up straight against the headboard. "C'mon, I already feel better. Let's go back downstairs. But I'm not dancing."

"No, your Mom told me to take care of you and that's exactly what I'm gonna do." Hooking his arm under Greg's legs, Nick scooped him further down the bed, readjusting the pillow beneath his head. He pressed a kiss to the top of his head, trying not to look so worried as he looked into his eyes. "I'm gonna go get Sadie from your Nana and tell your Mom you're gettin' some rest. Stay put."

"I will." Greg ditched his phone on the bed beside him, rolling over onto his side to get comfortable. He felt bubbles in his tummy as he settled on his side, feeling a little nauseous from the chicken soup scent behind him. He slid out of bed after a while, making a beeline for the bathroom once again. He couldn't throw up this time, but the nauseous feeling was enough to make him try.

He dropped to his knees in tears beside the toilet bowl, remembering his Papa Olaf first few cancer symptoms. The man hated doctors, so he never went to them for a cold or anything before, he certainly wasn't going to see one for the constant vomiting or abdominal pain he had been experiencing. It wasn't until the pain started to affect his day to day life that he actually decided to seek a doctor's help, who diagnosed him with gastrointestinal cancer.

Greg feared his own doctor had found this same conclusion in him, chalking it up to a lab error.

"C'mon baby, let's get you back to bed." Nick lifted him to his feet, practically carrying back to bed. He climbed into bed with him, holding him as he cried against his shoulder. He didn't want to ask what was wrong at first, mostly for fear of the answer, but once he settled down, he just had to know. "Is there somethin' you're not tellin' me?"

"This is how it started..." Greg closed his eyes, spilling more tears down his cheeks. "With Papa Olaf."

"It doesn't mean that." He hugged his partner tightly, touching his lips to his forehead as he smoothed his hand up and down his back. "Your Papa Olaf had lots of other symptoms and he was sick for a while. You've been healthy up until this point and your doc would have said if it was somethin' serious like that." He stroked his fingers through the younger man's hair, messing up his smart hairdo. He thought he looked cuter with the tousled look anyway.

"Nick, I have..." Greg's Nana Olaf gritted her together as she had just barged straight into the room. She gave the young man a smile as he climbed off the bed, retrieving his daughter from her arms. "Sorry," She whispered softly, looking back at her grandson on the bed. "Is he alright? Jean said he wasn't feeling very well."

"I hope so." Nick lifted his daughter against his chest, gently patting her back as she continued to sleep. "He's been sick for the past week or so . . . and he thinks it's the same thing as his Papa Olaf." He didn't think he should tell her because she was still grieving the loss of her husband, but he was hoping she could help to put her grandson's mind at ease.

The woman smiled softly, shaking her head as she looked towards her grandson. "I know it doesn't seem like it right now, but it'll all work out. You have to be there for him." She turned her attention towards Nick. "You'll know in good time. Just be there for him." She patted his arm, giving him a smile before she turned away.

Nick had heard the younger man telling his tales of his Nana's psychic powers, but he never believed in any of that supernatural stuff, even though her words sent a chill down his spine. He lay his daughter down in the crib against the wall, returning to the bed with Greg. He felt a little less worried about him now that he was sleeping, but he still really wanted to know what was wrong with him.

When they arrived back home in Las Vegas the following day, his doctor still didn't have the answers they needed though. In an attempt to take both their minds off it, Nick went ahead with their house hunting plans, giving Greg the tour of a house he had viewed while he was working. It was in a nice enough neighbourhood with a large open hallway in the entrance.

"Kitchen." Nick led him around the large island counter, directing him over to the hidden fridge, freezer behind the wooden cupboard doors. "There's a laundry room right through there too. No more cartin' your laundry down all those stairs." He led him inside, smiling as Greg ran his eyes across the machines, before he turned to look at him. "So, a little feedback here, G. What do you think?"

"I don't like it." He confessed, stepping out into the kitchen again. "It feels like too much of a... suburban house wife kinda thing."

"We can redo the wallpaper." Nick glanced towards the fruit covered wallpaper, realising they'd have to retile the wall above the sink too. "You don't like any of it?" He slipped his hand into Greg's, leading him towards the stairs. "You haven't even seen upstairs yet. The master bedroom is huge. It's got its own bathroom and a walk in closet."

"It's not really... me." Greg stopped him from pulling him up the stairs. "It's not really you either. We don't fit in a conservative neighbourhood. We'll be chased out with torches and pitch forks before we've even unpacked."

"Did anyone ever tell you that you have an over active imagination?" Nick smiled softly, giving out a sigh as he looked around the house. "I just wanted us to have somethin' like this. Normal and safe. We could have made space for an office for you or a playroom for Sadie. It's got a big garden for her to play out back."

"I want that stuff too, but this isn't it. It didn't even feel right from the driveway. C'mon, the next one will be better." Greg turned on his heels, dragging him towards the doorway. "You know I'm right."

"Unfortunately," He turned his wrist to look at the time, checking on Greg for the hundredth time. He seemed a little more alert today. He had managed to keep down his breakfast for now, but he was starting to look a little fatigued. "What time is our appointment at the hospital again?"

"Four. And it's 'my' appointment."

"I'm comin'." He unlocked his truck at the end of the driveway, giving Greg a smile. "Catherine is happy to have Sadie for the rest of the day, so you've got me all to yourself. We can probably make it to that open house I was tellin' you about, before we make our way off to the hospital."

"Fine." Greg knew there was no point in arguing with him, so he climbed into the passenger seat, letting Nick drive him off to the next house. He felt a little motion sickness in the car, but he felt fine once they got out into the fresh air again. Like the first house, it was situated in a very suburban looking neighbourhood. He avoided all the people traipsing through the front room, taking a brochure off the smiling realtor. "I've always wondered, how can you have two and half baths?" He asked her.

"Oh," The woman smiled, leading him through the hallway. "There's a master bathroom upstairs, along with a complete guest bathroom." She pulled open the door under the stairs, clicking on a little light to show him the downstairs bathroom. "This one only has the basic sink and toilet, so it's considered a half bath, because it doesn't contain a shower or bath."

"Cool." Greg examined the cupboard sized bathroom, feeling a little claustrophobic already. "So is one thousand square foot big?" He noticed another detail on the brochure in his hands.

"It's considered quite small in this particular neighbourhood." The woman nodded, leading him over to the window. "It really depends on how many rooms the house has rather than the square foot. The neighbours on the right is a three thousand square foot house. But it has a lot more rooms than this one, so it feels much more cramped. It's also up for sale. What kind of house are you looking for?"

"You got anything in the one story range, family sized with a friendly neighbourhood?"

"Actually I do." She retrieved a card from her pocket, placing it in his hand. "I'll be done here about five tonight. Give me a call anytime, I'll be able to take your details and give you a private viewing of the houses I have available in your range. I'm Dawn Spring, by the way." She introduced herself to him, excusing herself as she went to answer some questions for another couple.

"Hey." Nick stepped up beside him, after finally finding somewhere to park. "I leave you alone for less than five minutes and you're already flirting with the ladies. Did you get her number?"

"I did, actually." He presented the card to him. "She can give us a private viewing of any house we desire. How many bathrooms do you think we need?"

Nick couldn't help but smile, reaching out for the younger man's hand at his side. "So you don't like this one either? You haven't even walked past the kitchen yet."

"It doesn't have a good vibe." He shook his head, explaining, "I don't get a good vibe from this house. The second I walked through the door, I wanted to walk back out again. Our house shouldn't make me feel like that. And there's a tiny bathroom under the stairs that just has this whole... prison vibe to it. Look at this." He pulled his boyfriend by his hand, heading towards the kitchen. He pointed directly out the window, showing Nick the view of the brick wall of the alley outside the window. "I noticed it when I first walked in. Do you want that to be your kitchen view?"

"No." He confessed, realising why it was so difficult to find a house with a fellow CSI. Like him, he immediately saw every detail, searching for flaws or things out of place. "Not this place then." Nick led the way towards the door, pointing out the garage as they made their way down the garden path. "I've always wanted a garage though."

"I'll add it to the list."

"You have a list?" Nick motioned towards his truck at the other end of the street. "What's on it?"

"Open plan kitchen and dining area. Laundry room, although not completely essential. Screen doors leading out to the garden. No stairs. And a garage." Greg memorised the list off the top of his head, putting his back to Nick's truck. "Bedrooms... maybe three or four. No half baths. And maybe a study or large family room where we can all hang out in the evenings."

"You have a bigger list than me." He realised, leaning against the car beside him. "What have you got against half baths though?"

"Too small. And what if you decide that you want a shower while you're sitting on the toilet, but you're in the wrong bathroom?"

"And stairs?" Nick queried, looking round at him.

"I like having things all on one floor. Say you're hungry and you've just got out of bed. You don't want to stumble down a whole staircase just to get to the kitchen, before you can make your way back upstairs to eat something in bed. It'll be safer for Sadie too." He gave his partner a wide smile, hearing his watch beeping at his side. He watched him turning off the alarm, feeling his heart racing as he realised it was time.

Nick gulped softly himself, weaving his fingers together with Greg's. "You ready to go?"

"Is 'no' an acceptable answer?" Greg pursed his lips together, pushing himself to his feet. "Let's get it over with. Maybe I'm just over reacting and it's just a stomach bug." He closed his eyes as his boyfriend pulled him into his arms, hugging him tightly against his chest for a moment.

"C'mon, it'll be alright." Nick pulled open the passenger side door behind him, helping the younger man inside. He dreaded driving in the direction of the hospital, but Greg's doctor had assured them that these tests would be necessary to find out exactly what was wrong with him. He held Greg's hand all the way through the hospital, leaving his side for just a moment while Greg changed into a hospital gown.

"The doctor will be with you shortly." The nurse secured the patient identity bracelet around Greg's wrist, giving him a smile before she exited the cubicle.

"Are you okay?" Nick held onto his boyfriend's things in his arms, stepping up to the bed the younger man was laying on. He looked helpless already just being in a hospital bed, but it only made him love him even more. "Did he tell you how many tests they're runnin' today?" He caught a slight head shake from the younger man, noticing his lip quivering slightly from his nerves. He leant against the side of the bed, lifting Greg's hand into his own. "Your Nana Olaf told me that this would all work out. While you were sleepin', she told me and she looked certain about it."

"She did?"

"Yeah." Nick nodded, seeing a slight smile reaching his lips. "Have you ever known her to be wrong?" He glanced up as another nurse walked into the cubicle, giving them a smile as she set down a tray.

"I just need to take some bloods."

Greg let her lift his arm from the bed, looking away as he saw the needle. "Make sure you leave me some." He smiled at her. He had taken bloods from people at the lab before, but he still hated the sight of needles anywhere near him. He looked up into Nick's eyes instead, gently squeezing the man's hand as he felt the needle going in. "Talk to me." He pleaded the man beside him.

"Um..." Nick watched the blood draining from his arm, trying to think of something to say. "What else would you want? In your ideal house. You never mentioned anythin' about a garden. How big would you want it to be?"

"Not too big. But big enough to watch you mowing the lawn topless for a while."

Nick smiled back at him, not even caring about the nurse beside them. "I haven't mowed a lawn since I was fifteen. My Dad had one of those little tractor ones that you sit on. Our dog Bandit used to follow it around the fields. He'd keep a safe distance, he just liked to keep me company while I was out there."

"Would you want another dog?" Greg flinched a little as the nurse drained a second tube of blood from his arm.

"Maybe one day. We always had animals when I was a kid. I grew up in a house full of kids and animals. There was always somethin' that needed to be fed, walked or cleaned out. Gettin' into bed at night you'd have to trip over the dog beside the bed, before you tried to squeeze in beside the cats layin' across the covers. I think my sister's hamster was the worst. It used to run around in its wheel thing all night. I do kinda miss em though."

"I've only ever had a gold fish to myself. My Mom had her rescue cats after I left for college. I think she needed something to care for once I was out of the way. Papa Olaf hated dogs, so we were never allowed one when I was little. I think he got bit by one as a kid or something and he just developed this hate towards them. He used to have a go at dog walkers if they even came close to the house."

"We could get one someday." Nick gently brushed his thumb across the back of the younger man's hand, smiling softly as the nurse finally removed the needle from his arm. "I like German Sheppard's. Bandit was a dark haired German Sheppard. He had a really dark face with a light eye patch of fur on his left side. He had been mine since he was a puppy."

"So we'll need a big enough yard for a dog or maybe a park or something nearby. Sadie loves swings, so we could get one of those swing sets too." Greg tilted his head to the side, watching the nurse labelling up his bloods. "Did you leave anything in me?"

The woman smiled, giving him a nod. "I left you some. I'll be back in a minute. We'll need a urine sample, before we take you down for your CAT scan." She collected up the bloods, leaving them alone for a moment.

"A scan?" Nick queried, setting Greg's things down so he could gently brush his fingers through the younger man's hair. "What's that for?"

"My doc said it would either be a scan or one of those things where they make you drink something that they can see on a x-ray or something. As long as I don't have to have that camera thing stuck up my butt." He remembered him explaining the procedures to him, but it felt a little more terrifying now that it was actually here. He waited with Nick for what felt like hours, before the nurse finally returned. He felt more awkward than embarrassed about the urine test, terrified to leave Nick's side once he was carted to the CAT scan.

His throat felt dry as he waited. He had an IV drip placed in his arm once he was inside, making his arm feel cold. His palms started to sweat, but he felt cold shivers running down his spine. He vaguely heard the technician explaining the process to him, before he was being pulled into the machine by the tray he was laying on. He tried to lay as still as he could through his nerves, but with his arms pinned over his head and his waist tied down to the moving table beneath him, it felt very awkward and uncomfortable.

Greg squeezed his eyes tightly shut as he heard the humming sound of the machine, hearing the tech telling him to lie still. She talked to him the whole way through the ten minute scan, but it didn't make it any easier to try and relax.

"Look, there's Papa." Nick held his daughter securely against his chest, giving his partner a smile as he was wheeled past them in the hallway. He followed them to Greg's new room, waiting for them to leave them alone, before he leant over the bed to press a kiss to the younger man's forehead. "I asked Catherine to drop her off. You don't mind do you?"

"No." Greg shook his head, waving back at Sadie as she waved her little hand in his direction. "Hi, baby girl." He smiled widely, feeling more relaxed already. "Have you seen my doctor yet?"

"No, I asked the nurse when he was gettin' in, but she just said this other doc is handlin' your case now." Lowering his daughter to Greg's side, Nick let him hold her against his chest, feeling his heart sinking in his chest as he saw a smile returning to his boyfriend's lips. "Do you know when we'll get the results back from any of these tests?"

"The tech said the CAT scan can take one to two days."

"Two days?" Nick sighed, leaning against the side of his bed. He felt about ready to put his fist through a wall at this point, but like his Nana Olaf had said, he had to be there for him. He was the strong one in this relationship now. "I'll be back." He spotted the new doctor making his way through the hallway. "Excuse me," He caught up to the man. "I'm Greg Sanders' partner. Are you goin' to make him wait while you get the results to his tests?"

"Some tests we're running can take a few days to process. I've got him scheduled for an Ultrasound scan of his abdomen in an hour, then you should be able to take him home. We'll contact you as soon as we can with the results." The doctor tried to assure him. "Nick, isn't it?" He reached his hand out to him. "I'm Doctor Rhodes. We'll take good care of Greg. I'll be there for the Ultrasound scan."

Nick thanked him, returning to Greg's side. He leant over him to press a kiss to his forehead, listening to his daughter's soft breaths as she examined the hospital bracelet around the younger man's wrist. "One more test then we can go home, baby."

"We?" Greg glanced up at his partner.

"Yeah, the three of us. You, me and our daughter." He rested his arm against the barrier around his bed, keeping a close eye on him while they waited for the final test. It seemed to take a lot longer than an hour, but the time flew by with Sadie keeping him entertained. He didn't want to give her up once it was time to go, but the doctor assured him that they'd be reunited once they had everything set up.

"We'll just sit you down here." A nurse finally brought Nick and Sadie in, sitting them down on a chair not too far away from him.

"Okay Greg, this is the transducer." The doctor lifted the wand from beside the machine. "It'll send sound waves through your body that'll bounce off your organs and project the image here on this screen. We should be able to see blood vessels, tissues, organs and any abnormalities that we might be looking for. This will be cold." He squeezed some gel onto the younger man's stomach, before he moved the wand through it. He started very close to the patient's chest, pressing the device into his body quite firmly as he examined the image on the monitor.

At first he pointed out a few of the steady flowing veins that were pulsating on the monitor, before he pointed out his spleen and things. He got quiet all of a sudden as he noticed something, worrying the two of them as he took a pass at a section on Greg's stomach a few times from different angles, trying to get a clearer image of what he was looking at.

"What is it?" Nick couldn't stand the waiting any longer, startling the man out of his thoughts.

"Something I wasn't expecting to see." Doctor Rhodes scratched his chin for a moment, before he set the device down. He excused himself from the room, leaving them worrying while he went to fetch another doctor. He came back within a few minutes with the expert in toe, letting him take over the device. "Is it what I think it is?"

"It looks like it." The other man confirmed, still keeping Nick and Greg in the dark. He moved the device further to Greg's left side, moving it a little gentler than Doctor Rhodes was, but he wasn't saying anything either.

After more than four hours of tests, Greg was returned to his room, still with no idea what was wrong with him. He was starting to feel more than a little hungry after a whole day without food, but it was the first day that he hadn't thrown up in a while, so he wasn't about to upset his stomach even more.

"It's bad, I know it is." He glanced up at Nick beside him, watching the man settling his daughter for her nap against him. "That's why they won't tell us anything. They're afraid I won't be able to take it or they don't want the law suit when I die on them."

"You're not goin' to. I heard the nurse say that other guy was an expert in this field." Nick tried to put his mind at ease, even though he was worrying about it himself. The more worrying part was that he didn't know what field of medicine this man was an expert in. It could have been anything. "Here he comes." He spotted the other man making his way towards their room, with Doctor Rhodes behind him.

"Hello there. Mr Sanders, we've gone over your results together," Doctor Rhodes started, setting his patient's notes in front of him on the tray table. "And we've figured out that you have an undiagnosed condition. It's something that you've lived with your whole life and it's gone undetected all this time because you've never had a problem before."

"In a normal male," The other doctor stepped in. "We'd see twenty two pairs of chromosomes and one pair of sex chromosomes. Females have two of the same kind of sex chromosome XX, while males have two distinct chromosomes XY..."

"I know all this. I used to be a DNA tech." Greg stopped him from explaining the boring parts. "What's that got to do with me?"

"Well, in your case, you have a slight variation from the standard XY of the average male. An abnormality if you like. It's something we call Klinefelter syndrome, where the male has a second X chromosome, making you double XX Y instead of the normal male, XY. In most cases, it goes unnoticed. Likes yours. Most men find out about it during their teens when they don't develop. The male may require testosterone replacement or assisted reproductive technology to have children, but your life expectancy is still in the normal range." The other doctor stepped forwards, giving the patient a smile with his gappy toothed grin as he explained, "Your case is a very rare one that I've only ever seen once before. Along with the extra chromosome, you also have both fully functioning reproductive organs. The female reproductive system is not visible on the outside, but with your CAT scan and Ultrasound we were able to see them on the inside. It's gone unnoticed until now, because the system was... dormant if you like."

"What he's trying to say," Doctor Rhodes jumped in, finishing his own explanation. "Your second reproductive system has gone unnoticed before because there has never been a problem with it until now." He saw the worry in his patient's eyes, deciding not to make him wait any longer. "Mr Sanders, you're pregnant. About eight weeks I'd say. The nausea you've been feeling is morning sickness. Your original doctor thought your first lot of blood tests came back wrong, because they showed an increase in a hormone that we would see in pregnant women. They weren't wrong. With your extra chromosome you have become pregnant."

Greg had dropped his jaw a few sentences back, starting to feel a little nauseous once again. He was too afraid to look at Nick beside him, fearing the look he would give him or the questions he would ask. He wanted the doctor to rewind everything he just said and tell him he was dying of some horrific illness.

It would make a lot more sense than what he was just told, that was for sure.

"As far as we can tell, your pregnancy is progressing in the normal, natural way. Because of your extra chromosome, your body is almost fully equipped to deal with this pregnancy. The only part of it you wouldn't be able to experience naturally is of course the giving birth stage, because you have no cervix to give birth to the baby. The fetus looks healthy and is growing in your womb, so there's no reason to think that you couldn't go through with this pregnancy. But if you would prefer not to, we can discuss some options. We'll give you a minute." Doctor Rhodes ushered the other man out of the door with him, pulling it shut behind him. He couldn't help his excitement for this rare case, but he still had a vulnerable patient to think about.

For the longest time in their relationship, neither Nick or Greg spoke a word. They couldn't see each other from their current positions, so it made the processing of the information a little easier. It felt like a dream or a terrible prank, but they had left his notes behind that Greg had been skimming through for the last few minutes.

"Can you make sense of it?" Nick heard the pages turning after a while, turning to look at the beautiful man that he adored even more.

Greg shook his head slightly, understanding the terms and things, but it didn't quite fit in his head at the moment. "This is impossible. And unfair. Why can't I just get normal stuff like normal people?" He returned his notes to the table, rubbing the itchy spot on his arm where the IV drip had gone in. "This means I'm a... hermaphrodite. Half man, half woman. You know I always wanted to discover or create something, but I never wanted it to be actual life inside me." He gulped as he realised that was exactly what had happened. "There's a baby inside me. I'm not dying. I don't have cancer, but there's a human life in here and I created it."

"What about me?" The Texan pushed himself to his feet, adjusting Sadie to rest against his shoulder. "Eight weeks, that makes me your partner in creation. That's the first time that we..."

"Yeah, and it's all your fault." Greg accused him. "I've had sex for years before you came along. Maybe one or two times in college without any protection at all. First time with you and I end up pregnant. It's my punishment for knocking you off your path of denial and self loathing."

"How is it a punishment?"

"How isn't it? I was just an ordinary guy before this. Now I'm a pregnant hermaphrodite. Another baby out of wedlock to the Sanders clan. My great grandmother will not be pleased." He crashed back against the pillow behind him, hoping the drugs they had him on were giving him delusions, but the results were too real to ignore. He turned his attention towards Sadie as she started to cry, watching the man he loved trying to settle her. He realised that this would make them more of a family, but he didn't want to be pregnant. He also didn't want cancer like his Papa Olaf, but he knew the old man would be giving him an earful right now moaning about having one thing and not the other.

"I know it doesn't seem like it right now, but we can get through this Greg." His boyfriend directly quoted Nana Olaf, realising what she meant now. He wondered if she had known all along about his condition or the baby. "And I'm not goin' anywhere. I don't love you any less because of this. It doesn't even change the way that I feel about you. You're still my Greg and I love you more than anythin'."

"Do you mean it?" Greg spoke softly, looking up into his eyes. "You're not disappointed that I'm not sick with something else?"

"No. Not at all." Nick swept his fingers back through his partner's hair, looking down into his eyes. "I don't want you to be sick. I didn't think it would be somethin' like this, but we can get through it together." He allowed a smile to spread across his lips, finally letting go of the worry he had been holding onto all week. "You're havin' our baby, G. It's a little soon, but it's our baby."

"That's the part that scares me the most. The other thing I can live with because it's always been there, but a baby is going to change everything." He placed his hand over his stomach, fearing how much bigger it would get. He started thinking about the birth and how Nick would see him, only adding to his fears of the man leaving him with a screaming baby. "I have to call my Mom. Where's my clothes?"

"Here." Nick carefully lowered his daughter into Greg's arms, letting him hold her while he searched through the younger man's things for his phone. He turned back to Greg once he had found it, seeing tears in his eyes and a slight smile across his lips as he hugged baby Sadie against him. She had her head tilted back to look at him, giving her Papa Greg a concerned look as he continued to cry. "Greg." He held out the phone to him, feeling a little choked up himself.

"Dial." He breathed out between his tears, pressing a kiss to Sadie's little hand as she reached out for him. She was suddenly the most beautiful creation in the world to him, making him appreciate her a lot more than he used to. "Hi, Mom." He heard the click on his phone as she picked up. "You'll never guess what..." He knew she'd never guess it in a million years, so he decided to break the surprise and blurt it out. "I'm pregnant."

* * *

 **The End**

 **For now...**

 **Thanks for sticking with it and for your reviews, favourites and follows. Please let me know what you thought. Not sure when I'll upload the sequel yet. If not before Christmas then I might start to upload in the New Year. Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year all.**

 **~ Holly**


End file.
